I miss my Mia sometimes, I have the urge to do it a lot I just haven't given in , it really doesn't matter anyways my life's not going anywhere I might as well be skinny and not huge because I don't think I'll ever be truly happy. Or maybe I should just stop eating , that's probably the better choice. I think.

Please don't fall back down the rabbit hole...I know it can feel comforting in a familliar way, but it's not a good way to live your life.

I don't want to do it again and I think I can stop doing it, because I haven't done it in about a month or so. I'm hoping I can be strong and resist. Because it is quite a nasty habit.

Stay strong, you can do it. I hate having an eating disorder and I hate just constatntly being obsessed by food and I wish I could just switch it off. mostly I just hate how quickly i run back towards the old familliar habbits.

You've gone a month or so without doing it, so that's a good thing...just keep hold of it and watch it become 3 months then 6 and so on.

Helena x

But I've been down that road before, then something just triggers me and I just think, ->-bleeped-<- it, it doesn't matter I'll just do it again. It sucks everyday feeling so strongly, you are so fat, gross and disgusting you should just lose like 20 lbs. I feel like I'm going crazy.