Hah! I'll be honest CRaSH, your bad reputation points made me get a morbid curiosity of the threads you've posted in and I must say you are a unique case. You don't strike me as a troll, and you really genuinely seem to want to learn. That's an admirable quality, and as someone else stated, expecting you to get terms right and not be offensive without being educated is akin to throwing a firefighter into a burning building without any training....you're gonna get burned, or worse lol.

But hey, let me offer you a warm welcome to Susans. Thanks for sticking around - the worst thing you could have done was storm off the boards all angry and have a permanently negative view of transsexuals as being overly sensitive and defensive beings. I'll admit, many of us ARE, and mainly because cisgender people have mistreated us in the past, but the beauty of this forum is the amazing patience and knowledge many of the users here have. Stick around - you'll get plenty of insight, both for your research and for yourself!

Now, in terms of your research, here is my piece on violent women....

I've only experienced abuse from women. I've gotten sexually harassed and attacked by cis guys in the past, but the physical, emotional, and verbal abuse that I am familiar with came from women. Now don't get me wrong, I view sexual abuse AS physical violence/abuse. But in terms of non-sexual acts...women have been the perpetrators to me.

Two close family members (both female) have physically abused me growing up. One of them threatened to kill me and another family member repeatedly. The other actually ATTEMPTED to kill me and attempted to kill the first woman I mentioned. Pretty screwed up, huh?

I've you want actual specifics, I am more than happy to discuss this via PM as it is quite personal.

But I will also say that I've never had a girlfriend physically abuse me - just emotional abuse and a controlling/manipulative nature. Sometimes I'd just prefer to get hit instead of emotional abuse. =\

Anyways, this thread is so entertaining and full of win! Everyone is awesome for their contributions. CRaSH sounds like an ally, and the last time I checked, we can never have too many allies!

Quote from: Espenoah on April 10, 2011, 12:08:59 PM
CRaSH, I'm sorry that you haven't had the most warmhearted welcome from some people here on Susan's. In my opinion, it's uncalled for. It's like putting someone on a bucking bull who's never ridden and expecting them not to fall off. You don't know the "etiquette" behind transpeople, but you are willing to learn, and I'm sure you've had respectful intentions behind every post you've made.

People of Susan's, opressing the opressors is not going to bring equality or understanding. (Not to say you're an opressor CRaSH, but if transpeople acted this way to every cis person we knew, who would want to give us rights or freedom?)

I'm sorry CRaSH.

Don't apologize for me.

I'd like three things. One, everybody go read the entire rules as written by Susan. Two, everybody go read Julie Maries thread: Getting along, a guide to forum communications. Especially the part about if you're not comfortable with the topic, find another. This poster is asking uncomfortable questions, but some are willing to discuss these things. And three, maybe it's time to put a big padlock on this topic. Not on you, CRaSH, but we're getting nowhere. JMO, Tracey

I don't think I'll ever have the spoons for this discussion.

The title of this tread is Crash's Thread for a reason.

It is to give fair warning to those who don't like the flow of this topic to AVOID it.

No one if forced to read each and every post made here at Susans.  Crash has a reputation (deserved or not) use your own reasoning when deciding to follow what is said in this thread.

Don't blame Susan's, don't blame the Moderators.

Quote from: Valeriedances on April 11, 2011, 06:14:06 AM
I'm sorry, but I dont see anything entertaining in discussing violence. Soliciting discussion on violence is even worse. What is the purpose?

Oh, I see. So various threads around Susans that revolve around asking fellow transsexuals their experiences in bathrooms, discrimination in the workplace, problems with family and friends doesn't constitute soliciting discussions on violence?

Here is the plain fact: a cismale came onto Susans with a vastly different opinion than a lot of us. The fact that some users are shunning him away and putting him down is not helping. CRaSH is willing to argue that women can be (and are) just as violent as men and I honesty agree with him. Women are more likely to take it out on their kids than on their SO though I've noticed.

But the point being this: listen to the moderators. Some of us are willing to discuss these things with CRaSH and should be allowed to whether you disagree with him, the point of this thread, or both. And if you don't like te topic of disussion, there are hundreds more to choose from around here....

And my "entertaining" comment stemmed from a combination of factors....certainly NOT including the one you listed.

Quote from: Heath on April 10, 2011, 11:57:03 PMThanks for sticking around - the worst thing you could have done was storm off the boards all angry and have a permanently negative view of transsexuals as being overly sensitive and defensive beings.

Agreed 100%. CRaSH reminds me a lot of myself before coming out, although he's cisgender and I'm not. Most people in the world just don't understand us, so we should recognize when we have a chance to spread awareness of how we truly are.

I'm sorry your feel that way Valerie, I hope you take time to relax and think things over.

I guess I am not sure where you see the aggression in Heath's post.

But, you must do as you feel correct.

Quote from: Dàwkbua on April 11, 2011, 12:00:21 PM
Agreed 100%. CRaSH reminds me a lot of myself before coming out, although he's cisgender and I'm not. Most people in the world just don't understand us, so we should recognize when we have a chance to spread awareness of how we truly are.

Yes, we as a collective are quite a misunderstood bunch. Even when I'm 90 years old I will gladly sit in front of the most ignorant person on the subject of trans issues (hopefully the last ignorant one on earth by that point) and explain until I'm blue in the face. That's just how I roll.

And I'll be perfectly honest here, I've always known I was trans, but as a child did I understand anything about trans people or trans politics? No....we all have to start out somewhere though, right?

Quote from: Valeriedances on April 11, 2011, 12:12:10 PM
Your aggression is noted. I will post no more on this site.

Aggression? I'm not an aggressive person - I was just stating my opposing point of view. Defensive perhaps as you were challenging my feeling entertained over this thread, but aggressive I am not. Just sneak a peek at all of my prior posts on this site to know that I'm generally pretty easygoing. Aggressive would entail me being a troll - and I simply never want to associate with that label, lol.


Sarah Louise: Yeah....I wasn't trying to come off as aggressive at all. Though sometimes in my room I have fantasies of becoming the Hulk. JK!! I'm more of a Spiderman type of guy. Right down to the nerdy photography habit.

Everyone forgets that crash came here not even knowing what the hell this place was. To be honest, I wouldn't doubt it one bit if someone from the Buffalo Beast came here to troll. After all, the very first comment he made was on an article I had posted about ->-bleeped-<- gate. First thing out of his mouth? something offensive. He had absolutely no interest in trans issues until he somehow magically landed here from the incredibly small interweb, huh.

I don't think the hostilty you're perpetuating here is needed, Dana. Different opinions can be discussed civilly.

Besides, really, none of us can say for sure why CRaSH wound up here. We can speculate, but to accuse him of something with no proof isn't exactly fair.

And where is he now?

Not everyone can be on all day every day.

I just find it sad that the second a potential ally joins, instead of calmly educating him, he's faced with hostility. I was under the impression that this was a more caring forum than that.

I'm locking this topic for now.

Crash is banned for a week, so continued comment is useless.