This is a true story.

One day after a gruelling 16 hours sail, bringing an 100 years old Manx Nobby¹ from Peel² to Howth³ in foul weather, tired, hungry and parched a friend and I decided to go ashore for a fish and chips take-away and a few scoopes.
While ordering our fish dinners in the local chipper my friend, who is from Scotland, was surprised to discover that, despite the cost and labour involved in its processing, Smoked Cod was cheaper than the Fresh Cod.
As we were paying, wandering why, he asked the girl behind the counter.
"How is it that smoked cod is cheaper than fresh cod?"
Handing him his change came her answer:
" I dunno... may be they are easier to catch?"
Sitting at the bar in the pub next door, we were stll drying our eyes and trying not to choke on our food when ordering a couple of well deserved creamy pints of the black stuff to wash it all down.
LLL&R
Maebh

1- Traditional Herring Fishing Boats from the Isle of Man
2- Fishing harbour on the West coast of the Isle of Man
3- Fishing harbour, marina and old Vicking strong-hold just North of Dublin

 

Melissa

You know, when you had it listed as smoked one, I figured that "one" must be cod.  Since the edit, we yanks can get it.  And it is hilarious.  It would be even more so, if we had the inherent knowledge that "one" is cod.

Cindi

Sorry still don't get it.  Is there something wrong with cod?  Is it particularly bad when it's smoked?  Why would having it be easier to catch make it gross?  or cheaper?  There must be some small piece of knowledge that I don't have on the subject.

Melissa

Quote from: Melissa on February 03, 2007, 09:00:12 PM
Sorry still don't get it.  Is there something wrong with cod?  Is it particularly bad when it's smoked?  Why would having it be easier to catch make it gross?  or cheaper?  There must be some small piece of knowledge that I don't have on the subject.

Melissa

It's like if prunes were cheaper than plums and you ask the grocer why and he said "I dunno, are prunes easier to pick?

Quote from: beth on February 03, 2007, 10:51:31 PM
It's like if prunes were cheaper than plums and you ask the grocer why and he said "I dunno, are prunes easier to pick?

Oh, thanks.  That was one of the many possibilities my mind went towards.  So they're not really smoked then.

Melissa

Quote from: Melissa on February 04, 2007, 11:51:49 AM

Quote from: beth on February 03, 2007, 10:51:31 PM
It's like if prunes were cheaper than plums and you ask the grocer why and he said "I dunno, are prunes easier to pick?

Oh, thanks.  That was one of the many possibilities my mind went towards.  So they're not really smoked then.

Melissa

Come on. Pull the other one!* 

To smoke a fish, you take a FRESH FISH, gut it, descale it, fillet it, de-bone it. Put it in salt for 8 hours. Rinse it and then you hang it over a slow burning fire of damp oak shavings for at least 12 hours.


LL&R
Maebh
* In this instance, "one" stands for "leg"... OK? 

Heh, I got it Maebh.

And of course the smoked fish swim slower, so they're easier to catch. It's like people who smoke...

Dennis

Quote from: Maebh on February 04, 2007, 04:42:30 PM
Come on. Pull the other one!* 

To smoke a fish, you take a FRESH FISH, gut it, descale it, fillet it, de-bone it. Put it in salt for 8 hours. Rinse it and then you hang it over a slow burning fire of damp oak shavings for at least 12 hours.

* In this instance, "one" stands for "leg"... OK? 

Quote from: Dennis on February 05, 2007, 08:05:16 AM
And of course the smoked fish swim slower, so they're easier to catch. It's like people who smoke...

So they were smoked before they were caught.  Now I'm trying to figure out how they did that.  Maybe pour gas in the water and light it?  Perhaps the fishing boat caught on fire?  Maybe there happened to be a nuclear explosion.  Then again this is a true story.  Maybe they made the air smoky around the water.  Would that even work?  I know how fish is normally smoked--I just can't think of any good alternative ways. 

Melissa

They buy them a carton of cigs and a case of beer and put them in a room with other fish who smoke.

Dennis

Jaysus! will you ever get it? 

So let us put the record staight for good.

Cods are much more smarter than human. They lead a very healthy life style. They swim a lot for exercise, they eat only fresh and unprocessed food and never watch television, balancing their time perfectly between work rest and play.They never touch alcohol or tobacco nor even tea or coffee. All of which make them a health and fitness food by excellence.

To smoke them out you just throw a few smoke-flares* in the water; when they surface rubbing their eyes, caughing and gasping for fresh air you just scoop them up before they even have time to see you.

Et voila! It is as easy as that!**

LL&R
Maebh

*Readily available in any boats distress & emergency pack. The orange ones seem to be the most popular as they give a nice colour to the flesh of the Smoked fishes. This also allows the Chipper to distinguish them from the Fresh ones which have white flesh.

**You only have to remember to move out fast before the Coast-guards or the Lifeboat arrive for the rescue.

Quote from: Maebh on February 05, 2007, 09:20:19 PM
To smoke them out you just throw a few smoke-flares* in the water; when they surface rubbing their eyes, caughing and gasping for fresh air you just scoop them up before they even see you.

Et voila!

Oh, I've never heard of those before, nor did I know what they did.  I told you:

Quote from: Melissa on February 03, 2007, 09:00:12 PM
There must be some small piece of knowledge that I don't have on the subject.

Melissa

Maebh, you SO have to stop pulling Melissa's leg or she'll start walking funny   

Dennis

I love smoked Cod.  But they are hard to keep lit and they make me cough.



Kristi

Quote from: Kristi on February 06, 2007, 09:00:30 AM



Kristi

What can I say? Kristy you're brill, the colour is just perfect.

Quote from: Dennis on February 06, 2007, 08:55:01 AM
Maebh, you SO have to stop pulling Melissa's leg or she'll start walking funny   

Dennis

You're right Dennis ! So I better start pulling the other one. We wouldn't want her to keel over, would we?

Quote from: Melissa on February 05, 2007, 09:34:35 PM

To smoke them out you just throw a few smoke-flares* in the water; when they surface rubbing their eyes, caughing and gasping for fresh air you just scoop them up before they even see you.

Et voila!


Oh, I've never heard of those before, nor did I know what they did.  I told you:

There must be some small piece of knowledge that I don't have on the subject.

Melissa

So Melissa for your information: Smoked flares and rocket flares are used in emergencies to attract rescue to your position. They usually don't take kindly to have been called on a mission to find out that it was a false alarm. To penalise you for wasting their time they generally would confiscate your catch and gears and impose a hefty fine to defray the costs. But if you are used to escape the attention of the Customs and Exices zooming on your turf fires when moonshining you should have no problems.

PS. I sincerely hope that all this knowledge will not make your head to heavy and topple you anyway.

LL&R Maebh