Quote from: Jen on April 26, 2011, 09:52:20 AM
No ma'am, play all you like. Maybe you'll find something important there, even if it is simply that you aren't androgyne. All I meant to say is just because it sparkles doesn't mean you'll understand it
.
I think I will march back home. I like it here, but I know I don't belong. That doesn't mean I will ignore the thread, but I've dug through enough here to learn what I needed to know.
Quote from: Virginia on April 26, 2011, 08:04:35 AM
I think Jen summed it up pretty well. It's not about what we want; it's about who we are. Therapy, hormones, the relief of allowing myself to express the half of who I am I had locked away so long I forgot it existed; what I want is to go back to the cisgender life I lived for 30+ years; what I want is to live my life without an hour going by that I don't think about gender; what I want is something, anything, that will make the dysphoria go away.
The monkey jungle, among the blooms with the fairy princesses, their is a place for each of us. Despite the allure, the unicorn forest is a barren wasteland for all but those destined to call it home. It was a long hard struggle to get to here. It's not what I want. But the forest is my home.
Trust me: I, for a period of two months years ago, and then again for two days right around the time I started this thread, felt like you do all of the time. I could not cope and went to a bad place, so I moved forward with full transition. I am not saying that I would recommend it, I would never suggest such a radical thing, I'm just trying to somehow relate. As someone who is out and on the road to full transition but forced by circumstance to live as their birth sex the majority of the time, I often feel crises of identity and pass over the clinical threshold. I too can not take my mind off of things concerning gender, but it is because I know I'm not in a good place.
Bye for now friends, I'm off to join others among the blooms. My time here was very informative :