I was a few years younger than you are now when I finally came out and told my family about me wanting to be a woman (mid-late 90s, don't remember exactly), by your age I was seeing a therapist and eventually hormones. I thought the same as you, was I getting too old, was it too late, but then if I don't do something now, I would continue to be depressed, always unhappy inside with myself and what I was, which could have eventually led to me killing myself (I must've thought of thousands of ways to do it, some quick, some brutal), and sometimes I wonder now, what would have happened to me if I didn't seek help, didn't get on hormones, didn't start living my life the way I needed to, I still wonder if I'd still be alive today.
You can try to do many different things to suppress who you really are, by keeping yourself busy and whatnot, even being yourself in privacy, still hidden away from the rest of the world, still having to put on that costume which is not you and present yourself as the world (possible disapproving family, most other people in general) wants you to, its not enough, those feelings are still there, lingering, waiting to be set free, you'll go through long periods of time seemingly doing okay, at least outwardly, but then one day, just some random occurance, total breakdown, everything, all those pent up emotions and things that you've been denying yourself, come bursting out, sometimes at the wrong time and place. You at least have to find someone to talk to about this, a profession whom can help you, at least, then see where you can go from there. But at least you've come here, plenty others with the same kind of turmoil, get whatever off your chest that you feel comfortable sharing.
