My family is making it almost impossible for me to live at home. I haven't even come out yet. My dad and sister do nothing but shout at each other and just being in the house with all three of us is so stressful. I had very bad suicide thoughts the other night. My dad is a homophobiac and I don't know how to confront him with this. My sister, I don't know. I don't think she'd be against me transitioning but I do know she wouldn't support me either. If I come out now I have a feeling I'll get a bad reaction from them. I've been out of school for a year now (I graduated but I don't know what to do with my life) and have a minimum wage part time job. I'm making it a goal to move out by the end of summer. But is it realistic? I don't think I could get a job that will support myself well enough by that time. I haven't even gotten around to finding a therapist yet. I've got two very good and supportive friends. But I'm lost. My thoughts are all over the place, sometimes it will get to a point where I self harm. I think all this would go away if I moved out and found a quiet place to plan out my life. But... like I said, is that realistic? Most careers that lead to well paying/supportive jobs take at least a year in school. Argh.. anyways advice would be greatly appreciated, and sorry if I didn't make myself clear in this post.

If you just graduated HS, look into to going to college.  Some where that you have to live on campus maybe.  Otherwise look for another job that pays better, second job ( I shudder at this one, I tried and could not do it. ) or budget your wages to save to get out.  It is always better to be out on your own.  Removes the stress of the family.

Hopefully you can be out, on your own, by your plan.

I'd agree with the college thing, if it is at all possible - maybe a community college in another city.

I went from wanting to die pretty much 24/7 to loving life in the span of my first week away from home at college.  The second benefit of college was it let me move far enough away to be the person I wanted to be.  The college thing itself didn't work out so well (I'm graduating this year, 16 years after I entered college the first time!).  But the freedom I had there was absolutely wonderful.

There are other ways of getting away from home if college isn't a good choice, but I can't speak too much about them.  I would say two things though:  1) Not every change is a good change, so make sure whatever you do is really better and not just different (but there are plenty of good changes!), and 2) if you can't get out right now, keep the hope alive - you WILL get out and it will be wonderful when you have the freedom to be who you are!

As for affording to live on not much money, do you know people you can safely share an apartment with?  That was the way I could afford to do it.  And I won't say that I lived in great places - I lived in some real dumps.  And I certainly had no money for fun.  But it was way better than being at home.

find a full time job or possibly 2. you'll be busy but you'll also be comfortable if you want to live alittle more lavishly we could say (cable, internet, name brand food ect). if you still dont make enough money and you have no problem with it ego wise, check out food stamps.i'm on social security and will be on food stamps and living in subsidized housing since i 'm mentally ill and cant work. even i may get a part time job eventually though...if i can handle the stress but thats another subject. i wish you the best. self harm and a unstable, fighting household are two things which made my life hell. *hugs* you can do anything you put you mind to.if you need me i'm only a click away.dont be afraid to ask for my number either cuz i dont want you to have suicidal thoughts either.please be safe.
love,
alex

Thanks alex, I appreciate your kind words! Really though, I do. I can't imagine being here any longer. I want to get out and possibly take my dog with me (she's a Pomeranian). I think I'd be heartbroken if I had to say goodbye to her. Things already seem to be looking up today. I decided I have two options: 1) to get a roommate and live in my area, close to my neighbourhood or 2) live with my grandparents further away (in their basement suite, they won't charge me either, but I wonder if it would be the same as being truly independent. After all, I'd be living away from my dad and sister, but like I said, I'd still be living with family and technically not "out on my own"... but it's a start?). I wonder which option would be better in the long run.

grandparents for sure! you can save up your money and keep your dog.

^^ maybe... but I could still find an apartment that allows pets and be able to keep her then. Well for now I suppose I will look at my grandparents house. But what if they don't accept me for being trans? Because eventually they'll find out too.

my grandparents thought it was wonderful.lol

My granparents are your traditional homophobiac and sexist type... but then if that's the case maybe my whole transitioning thing because me being a boy would be a miracle to them. You know what I just realized I can't live with them. For personal reasons. Well, ok.. let's just say I'll PM you