I'm going to see my new GP for the first time this afternoon, to talk about referral to the gender identity clinic. And it turns out I'm scared as hell, in a, you know, contained British sort of way...

So far, I've worked out that it'll go a lot easier if I start out by telling her this is difficult for me to talk about! I decided I'd feel easier seeing a woman doctor, and I'm lucky to be able to choose based on the photos of the local doctors - this may sound like a daft way to decide, but I have an unfortunate history of being misdiagnosed or dismissed by medical practitioners, so I'm pretty careful who I see. Faces tell you a lot.

How it works in the UK is that the GP has to refer me to a psychiatrist for assessment - even though gender dysphoria is no longer classed as a "disorder", historically it's still a psychiatrist who makes the diagnosis, and then refers me to the GIC. This could all take a while (as in months before I actually get through the clinic's door), but I've decided I'd rather go the NHS route than do all of this privately. It's not just to save money! I also want to be part of a local support network of other people in transition, rather than dealing with all this more on my own.

I've just started seeing a gender therapist in the meantime, as that seems a worthwhile investment in my emotional state .

But this feels like a very significant day - I hope I don't turn into a scared little child in front of the GP.

Hi Padma

Don't be scared, why should you, you have nothing to be scared off.
Just tell here your feelings, these are real feelings and it's a problem to you in your daily life.
Let's just solve the problem honey.

In Holland it works about the same way, they send you to a psychiatrist, not to treat you for the transsexuality and you don't have to prove that you're a transsexual but to make sure that there is no psychiatric disorder before you can be treated.
Otherwise, they could be charced later for negligence, due to lack of examination.

Hey, Padma, everything is going to be okay, you'll see.
Please keep us updated.
So, no shivers down your spine, no clacking knees, just on your way to be the woman that you are.

I wish you a lot of success with your first meeting with your GP.


Hugs
Annette

Padma,

It can be scary, everything is scary. I had to come out to a GP who had known me for more than 20 years, not a newbie .

The easiest way to deal with any medical person is to tell the truth.

Hi Dr, My name is Padma, I've just moved into the area for several reason but one is to deal with my sexuality. You see I have always identified as female gender, even though I'm in this rather large male looking cask. I have tried very hard to deal with my feelings but it keeps coming back to that I am female. I'm at a point were I need help to deal with this by a referral to a therapist who deals with transgender people.  I hope this is not a shock to you, I am very nervous in this discussion but I really do need to move forward.

Thank You for listening to me. Again I am quite nervous and emotional

Go for it Sis

Cindy

Call it a "growth" experience which truly it is.
Most GPs are fine (on the surface at least) even if they will not fully be able to understand you. Saying goes: "What you can't feel, you can not (ultimately) understand"
And as the others said. Keep your cool, don't mind showing your insecurity, be sincere - above all be HONEST.
That did it for me, (getting HRT from my GP, rather then my "gate-keeper" shrink, idjet). So it should do it for you too, I'm sure.
Strength honey, the real crunchy stuff seems to be starting.
Axelle

Hi Padma;
I know it's easy to say but don't be scared hon.  I was at the end of my last doctor visit and I asked her if I could talk about something that I knew since I was 12. She said  "of course" and out it came. we talked for 15 or 20 minutes after that and it was probably the best 15 minutes of my life. we're still deciding where to go from here but it was a great beginning.
Be brave sis.
Hugs
Beth

It never hurts to shave VERY closely, wear a little mascara, and maybe a bit of lip gloss.  This isn't jumping through hoops or putting on a show, it's expressing who you are and want to be.  Too much is over the top, a little bit is perfect.

Caith, who I am is a bit more hippy dyke than that, so lip gloss and mascara don't feature, but the dungarees and purple boho shirt and red sports shoes do . I'm cursed with only being able to shave every 4-5 days, in fact I still have painful razor rash from yesterday.

I'm less cranked up about it than I was this morning - we'll see who we both are when I get in there later this afternoon.

Pip pip,  Chin up.  all that typical British stiff up lip sorta thing.

Or to say it the America way ...

Hey Padma

Hopefully the GP you have chosen will be the right one. I was lucky, my GP was brilliant, totally supportive and really easy to talk to. She has even phoned me a couple of times since to let me know what is going on with the referals etc. The psych appointment was about a month later, and was very straight forward, but don't assume they have any knowledge or specialism in gender issues. The one I saw from the local psych team was at best, a 'generalist'. She was very nice, asked me all the usual questions, and came to the conclusion that I am not mad, nor do I have any underlying issues that might be the root cause of my gender dysphoria, and so recommended that I be referred on to the people who do know their stuff, i.e the Gender Clinic at CX.

Since the first referall, my GP is also being quite proactive in chasing up the PCT with regard to funding etc as the 18 week NHS waiting list directive only starts after letters are exchanged and the funding is approved and only then can the clinic arrange my appointment (and the waiting list clock starts ticking...).

So I am in the waiting stage now. It is exciting, scary and frustrating, depending on what day of the week it is... :-/

I hope your appointment goes well, and the psych appointment comes round pretty quickly! Onwards and upwards, as they way!

Best

Amy.x

Well, that was a lot easier than I expected! But then the GP I chose was lovely, very lighthearted (whilst taking me seriously) about it. She said "Ooh, it's been years since I've referred someone for this, I'm not entirely up to date on how it works now, but we'll learn together!" So she's referring me to the nearest psychiatrist, which is in Torquay (road trip!!) She reckoned a month to 2 months' waiting list for that.

It was also made easier by the fact that she looks like an older, leaner, chirpier version of Sinead Keenan, the fine-looking werewolf gal in Being Human (the English version) . I'll have to try not to fall for her...

Quote from: amybenedict on May 26, 2011, 11:00:24 AM
Since the first referall, my GP is also being quite proactive in chasing up the PCT with regard to funding etc as the 18 week NHS waiting list directive only starts after letters are exchanged and the funding is approved and only then can the clinic arrange my appointment (and the waiting list clock starts ticking...).

That's really useful information, thanks!

congrats. Sounds like you got a nicer one than me on my first go.