Hi guys,
(oh, not sure if that's PC when talking about having babies?)
just felt like so, as most GGs are just fine with that "Hi guys" part, but may get a bit (very?!) freaked when we TGs try share about our deep inner desire having had our own child/baby. (talking in own self tummy, not surrogate, yes).

THAT is that ONE GG bastion when the chips are down! And boy (PC?) are we put into our place. When it happens I just want to vanish down a plug-hole and never resurface – feeling SO horribly inadequate.
OK, may just be me so this why I bring up the subject.
Honey, GGs may be SO accommodating to us, but the buck stops when we talk pregnancy and having your own, very own baby! Actually NOTHING beats that! (not even a Porsche 4 seater).

So is this here poor chick (self) just having a flight of E induced fancy, or what?

Can handle it (of sorts) these days, but the plain jealousy, baby jealousy, is it there to stay? Forever? So far it looks that way...

I do have a son but obviously not quite what I'm talking about quite and even then I was jealous as hell. Just turned it around and got quite ar**holes about it all at the time. Hope I'm forgiven by now. But THAT be another story yet and even more mortifying.

It be nice to know what you TGs feel about that. Warts and all if you please.
Axelle

I have no idea what 'TG's' might think about it...from my perspective as someone who previously had medical intervention to correct a transsexual condition, it has NEVER been an issue.  But then again, the only time the question has come up about me having kids, those asking understand when I tell them I never had a desire to be intimate with a turkey baster (harkening to the old lesbian jokes).  Within the office, where admittedly the personal medical history is not known to most employees of the firm and they know me as a highly skilled lesbian, there is often a consensus that follows that life probably MUST be easier without having to put up with a husband.  Now into the age where few people recommend getting pregnant to begin with, the closest I get if someone pushes on pregnancy is whether I regret never having had children...

I have NEVER had any significant maternal instinct.  Had I been born natal, I don't know that I would have had it either given that I have identified as lesbian since my very early teens...

MOST natal women know that not all women have a maternal instinct...

+++ MOST natal women know that not all women have a maternal instinct... +++

Aye Ann, so that fine then for you... what about if you DO have maternal instincts?! I do, so then what?

Yes, like getting one self "set-up" I realize that. Yet, hanging with GGs, new babies and all, just causes this jealousy.
Female jealousies that of course pervade beyond babies, to all the others stuff. No need to go into it here, or.
Axelle

Within ten years or less genetic engineering of somatic stems cells would afford the generation of uterus, vagina, and ovaries for females born with the wrong genitalia. Thus, young TS/TGs will be able to have their own children, not different than the so called "natal" or "cis-female"

Personally, my mind says I am 19, my body says I am 35, but my license says "extinct"

I have 4 children, an hopefully I will be a Grand something soon. When I was of bearing age, I used to fell such an aching in my abdomen when I saw pregnant ladies ... Thee pain went away when my kids come alog ...

+++ I was of bearing age, I used to feel such an aching in my abdomen when I saw pregnant ladies ... +++

Good to know, exactly what I'm referring to.
Difference being I'm not of child bearing age and I do also have a kid, yet the aching is still there when I see a pregnant woman. (The prettier the worse! :-) Really!

It actually keeps stabbing me in the tummy and it makes me wonder will it pass some time? Ever?
Somehow it must be related to E because I never noticed this before, and it IS one powerful emotion.
Axelle

I convinced myself that my children come from within myself, this delusion help me imensly. I even created memories of the pregnancy. In the future I WILL SAY i WAS TOTALLY DRUNK WHEN i WROTE THIS

I was thinking about this just yesterday. I had a dream where I was pregnant and had a baby.

Anyway. I can't tell you if the maternal instinct will go away. I do hope it doesn't as I see it as a good thing. However, I can give you my perspective on the subject.

Axelle, pregnancy ins't a GG, natal women or whatever label fits bastion. As a example, there have been FtM guys who had babies and got pregnant. In addition, transsexualism is one of the many medical condititions that could render a woman sterile, so in addition to us there are many other women who can't have babies. There are women who are insensible to male hormones, so developed a female body though they are XY. There are women who had carcinoma. There are women who were born with defective organs. There are women who had serious traumatic accidents. There are women that due to certain diseases are too fragile to have babies. There are women who's HUSBAND is sterile. Certain infectious diseases can also render a woman sterile if not given proper care.

There are a millions ways a woman can be sterile and transsexualism is just ONE of them. As such, it can't be a bastion of "they". There is no us or they, we are all women.

I do not find myself getting jealous, because honestly, pregnancy sounds like an all around terrible experience culminating in an awful hospital trip.

And really, even if I wanted kids, I don't think our world really needs the contribution... there are just enough people already.

But I know the issue here is "but what's inside me is not what's inside normal women." Well, I think living as a trans person, in some way or another you have to get over that, and just be thankful that at least the outside appearance can match.

This is a significant issue for many people. I don't know if there will ever be a biological solution, but in theory at least, it could become possible in the next 50 years or so...

Meanwhile on a more positive and immediate note, here in the UK adoption by a trans parent is now perfectly acceptable. Sadly by the time it became so i was already too old and my financial circumstances were no longer ideal to do so. Had i been 10 years younger when these social changes happened I would have adopted formally.

As it is I seem to have acquired two de-facto children through informal adoption. One came to us when he was a troubled teen, the other... well she was a wee bit older . Ok they are both of adult age now but you would be surprised how nice it is to have someone to pass things on to and to feel that they will at least remember you as you get old and eventually depart.

Kate,
I think have to go with your idea. Gets the closest to what I feel. AND AM DEFFINATELY NOT DRUNK, honey :-)

Thanks for inspiration. I mean all this realism stuff is all so RIGHT but still leaves me with tummy ache in womb --- what womb? Gosh, here I go again. Oh no.
Hug,
Axelle

Quote from: Axelle on May 29, 2011, 12:37:52 PM
Kate,
I think have to go with your idea. Gets the closest to what I feel. AND AM DEFFINATELY NOT DRUNK, honey :-)

Thanks for inspiration. I mean all this realism stuff is all so RIGHT but still leaves me with tummy ache in womb --- what womb? Gosh, here I go again. Oh no.
Hug,
Axelle

Ow Honey, My eyes feel with tears, I feel  you pain, OOOO. Some of us, like you and me, are more females that other. I was luke this even before spro, I am afraid waht is going to happen when I star my E.
Kate DE

Being barren was a HUGE issue when I was young!

It was the birth of my nice and holding her for the first time that pushed me over the edge a long time ago, a flood of maternal feelings that I had fought to suppress, feelings that exploded when I held that baby.

I had SRS at age 24, at an age when my friends were starting families, so there were always baby showers and new babies around. God that was HARD! I always hoped to adopt but didn't have the best of luck with marriage and years slipped by without the situation being right. By my 50s it was grandchildren that I missed so much.

It stinks but all you can do is play the cards you were dealt.

I wish...    I get an empty feeling whenever I see a pregnant woman, especially if she is around my age.  All I can do is hope technology improves enough to make it happen in the next 10-15 years.  In the worst case I can adopt, but I would really like my children to be genetically mine and my partner's if at all possible.

Hi girls just keep it coming, it make me feel SO not alone in this one.

Helena,
+++ "Babies make my non existent ovaries explode..." +++ how much better can one out it. It makes it a bit less sore to know I'm not so alone in this.

What we haven't even touched on is breast feeding going along with it all. Have that new born in your arms, making the appropriate noises and then WHAT?!?
Honey! Run in circles like a crazed chicken, cry, can't just whip it out and get over and done with. Actually been in the situation more then once. Worse then just beholding a lovely ripe pregies' melon and proud mummy so fine with it all. So full of pride.

OK, hon I better stop. Like a cupboard full of the fine chocolates and lost the keys. Actually so much worse yet.
Thank you for sharing,
Axelle

There are soem pediatrcians who advocate fahers use their nipples as pacifiers on two accounts: most hygenically clean than their pinky nails, and becouse it bonds the child to the father.

The last assertion can bring up the old "but the baby will be confuse as who is the mother" BS. babies recognize Mom by: smell, voice, and milk. Dad does not meet any of those criteria.

Last, it is the reward for the father (pleasure), and the awaking of protective and nurturing instinct in the male.

Here s the clincher, how does the mother feels about this? How does she respond?

Controversial, you said? This is not a topic I am willing to talk with anybody. The tribe is still to superstitious and ignorant to deal with this topic in a logical way.

Kate D