Problems with my mum have already started to happen. I was in the shower yesterday and she took that as an opportunity to talk to my boyfriend. He told me afterwards that she was asking him why he was still with me and what was stopping him from leaving. Now I might be looking too much into this or I'm being paranoid but that almost sounds like to me that she was encouraging him to leave before he gets hurt. She didn't say anything like Well done for staying, this is really brave, thanks for being there for her for support. There was simply "Whats stopping you from leaving." It just didn't seem like she was concerned about my feelings at all but was more worried about his. Maybe it wasn't intended that way but its been making me feel bad all day and I feel terrible to the point of feeling ill. I know that this is probably nothing and there will be worse issues to come. I just wish I had a friend to talk to. The only person I have is my boyfriend and I don't want to put anymore pressure on him. Things must be really hard for him too which makes me feel guilty and I feel even more guilty now like I'm forcing him to stay with me.

You need to confront your mother about this.

If she is going to be like this now, what is it going to be like when the changes go into overdrive?

Hmm... there's also the possibility that she had your best interests at heart and wanted to make sure he wasn't going to hurt you by leaving, so wanted him to tell her in his own words why he wouldn't. Those things could be taken several different ways. People can be insensitive sometimes, but that doesn't automatically make it malicious.

I agree with Cynthia, you need to find out one way or the other.