I don't think it's so much of a trend more than people are using it for attention.

I think people will do things like surgery and go on T just for attention. Some people are so f**ked up they will do anything for it.

Just look at Ashley Kirilow... she faked CANCER just for attention. CANCERRR. She shaved her head and plucked every single eyelash and eyebrow out. She even created a fake fundraiser and got money for it. Can you believe that?

And yes I remember when everyone was bisexual. Notice how those bisexual women never showed an interest at all in women BUT EVERYONE HAD TO BE AWARE THEY WERE BISEXUAL.

And for me to get T I just needed a referral from my family doctor and didn't need anything for my surgery.

I think if anyone is dumb enough to do those type of things and pay for them for attention just let them be stupid and ignore it.

funny enough i had this girl friend she told everyone she was gonna be a boy and call herself (insert boy name) and everyone went thats nice, didnt really give her attention about it. so about 1 month later she was (girl name again) and Denys ever saying she wanted to be a boy.......... Sad that some people use a curse to get attention.

Quote from: LilKittyCatZoey on July 30, 2011, 02:57:40 PM
funny enough i had this girl friend she told everyone she was gonna be a boy and call herself (insert boy name) and everyone went thats nice, didnt really give her attention about it. so about 1 month later she was (girl name again) and Denys ever saying she wanted to be a boy.......... Sad that some people use a curse to get attention.

Yeah I know exactly what you mean.

It pisses me off because being trans, this is serious, this is real life. I'm not playing dress up or some ->-bleeped-<-.

Quote from: Da Monkey on July 30, 2011, 03:08:15 PM
Yeah I know exactly what you mean.

It pisses me off because being trans, this is serious, this is real life. I'm not playing dress up or some ->-bleeped-<-.

Exactly!!!

Quote from: Solobear on July 30, 2011, 03:50:35 AM
Anyone who dares bring it up gets flamed for it, but yes, I think it's become trendy. It's still a lot more socially acceptable for a girl to dress and present as male, particularly teenagers. And when I browse Youtube or Tumblr blogs, the younger users are often the same type of kid - badly dyed hair, ugly piercings, ear plugs, baggy clothes and everything in their life is so random LOL. The same sort of kids as when I was fifteen, were saying they were gay, and blogging about being bisexual. Now that they're in their twenties, they quietly shut up about how gay they so were. Maybe it's just the types of channels and blogs I've visited, but most young teenage trans people are FTM. MTF is still taboo in a lot of places ie, not as trendy. It's too different. I can't work out why there are so many more alleged FTMs than MTFs online, when statistics indicate the balance is with a big MTF majority in the real world.
Of course it's not true for everything. Just like there are young people who are genuinely trans, genuinely homosexual, genuinely socialist, genuinely into metal, genuinely have addiction problems, there are many more who jump on the bandwagon, because it's always been cool to have something 'wrong' with you, and be outside the norm.
Maybe I'm being ->-bleeped-<-r-than-thou, but I just can't take a sixteen year old whose biggest problem is 'omg, my mom won't let me cut my hair short', and only posts about how awesome and/or 'beautiful' their friends are on Formspring, while not seeking any kind of community support or professional help, entirely seriously.
But, whatever. Maybe I'm wrong. I grew up in a small English town largely devoid of anything or anyone LGBT-related. Maybe that's how kids cope these days. But if it was (and is? I don't know) acceptable to say being outside the sexual norm was trendy, why is it so insensitive and ignorant to say that being outside the gender norm could be too?

That's just my opinion. It's not like I'm going around telling people that they're not trans enough, or thinking that they're lying. Teenage years are confusing. Is it offensive? I dunno. It's not directed at anyone here on Susan's, and I don't spend enough time in the blogosphere to think of any examples in particular. But it's something that grates on me from time to time, and I'm glad I'm not the only one to consider it.

I couldn't have said it better. I live in a small town on the east coast and every middle school/early high school aged kid here acts like this.

Quote from: Solobear on July 30, 2011, 03:50:35 AM
Anyone who dares bring it up gets flamed for it, but yes, I think it's become trendy. It's still a lot more socially acceptable for a girl to dress and present as male, particularly teenagers.

Bottom Line Here? Anything "male" is trendy and anything "feminine", no matter who practices it . . .   IS DEAD!

ie: "Sexy" Is Not Feminine - how did telka put it? It's the result of the Hollywood Satin Worshipers, worse than homosexuals (effeminate, nurturing males?)

Quote from: Da Monkey on July 30, 2011, 02:08:10 PM
I don't think it's so much of a trend more than people are using it for attention.

I think people will do things like surgery and go on T just for attention. Some people are so f**ked up they will do anything for it.

Just look at Ashley Kirilow... she faked CANCER just for attention. CANCERRR. She shaved her head and plucked every single eyelash and eyebrow out. She even created a fake fundraiser and got money for it. Can you believe that?

And yes I remember when everyone was bisexual. Notice how those bisexual women never showed an interest at all in women BUT EVERYONE HAD TO BE AWARE THEY WERE BISEXUAL.

And for me to get T I just needed a referral from my family doctor and didn't need anything for my surgery.

I think if anyone is dumb enough to do those type of things and pay for them for attention just let them be stupid and ignore it.

Quote from: LilKittyCatZoey on July 30, 2011, 02:57:40 PM
funny enough i had this girl friend she told everyone she was gonna be a boy and call herself (insert boy name) and everyone went thats nice, didnt really give her attention about it. so about 1 month later she was (girl name again) and Denys ever saying she wanted to be a boy.......... Sad that some people use a curse to get attention.

Hahaha oh god.

A girl I went to high school with (and unfortunately shared a bedroom with for a few months) pulled the cancer bs on a smaller scale and told me she had brain cancer while she was in a hysterical fit after getting into a fight with our other roommates. Needless to say I, nor anyone else, heard any more of it.

She was also the type of person to go on about being bisexual, and even lesbian, and then immediately sleep with and date several men.

It's annoying, but it definitely happens in the trans community too. Some people have attention problems. I believe there is a personality disorder, called Histrionic PD (I think), that involved just that sort of drastic attention-seeking behavior, that often causes a shifting, complicated sense of identity, sexual orientation, and gender identity.

Anyway. I do believe that the majority of those who identify as trans* are trans*. Like the counterargument to the argument of homosexuality ("Why are there so many f**s these days?"), it's because this generation is pushing social change. People feel safer to come out, regardless as to what they are coming out. A lot of young people see their peers and think, "Well coming out solved their problems, which sound a lot like mine. Maybe that's what I should do."

Hell, even before I came out I occasionally joked (to myself), "Man, now so-and-so's trans, and so-and-so is trans. Who's gonna be next, me??"

Lol.

There might be some people identifying as androgynous, 'bois', genderqueer, etc. because it's trendy. I'm open to that possibility. Genderqueer in particular seems to be adopted by some people as a political label.

I seriously doubt any but a small handful actually end up transitioning, and those probably don't go very far (maybe top surgery?). If you're not transsexual, physically transitioning will make you transsexual - and having endured cross-sex hormones for 15 long years, I can be pretty much assured from firsthand experience that it would be immediately obvious how wrong it is. My brain doesn't function on E...in fact, it tried to kill me quite a few times.

(Just in case, for anyone reading this who's having doubts about your transition: if hormone treatment is making you feel worse, stop. Now.)

Quote from: Ryan J on July 30, 2011, 04:32:52 PM
Hahaha oh god.

A girl I went to high school with (and unfortunately shared a bedroom with for a few months) pulled the cancer bs on a smaller scale and told me she had brain cancer while she was in a hysterical fit after getting into a fight with our other roommates. Needless to say I, nor anyone else, heard any more of it.

She was also the type of person to go on about being bisexual, and even lesbian, and then immediately sleep with and date several men.

It's annoying, but it definitely happens in the trans community too. Some people have attention problems. I believe there is a personality disorder, called Histrionic PD (I think), that involved just that sort of drastic attention-seeking behavior, that often causes a shifting, complicated sense of identity, sexual orientation, and gender identity.

Anyway. I do believe that the majority of those who identify as trans* are trans*. Like the counterargument to the argument of homosexuality ("Why are there so many f**s these days?"), it's because this generation is pushing social change. People feel safer to come out, regardless as to what they are coming out. A lot of young people see their peers and think, "Well coming out solved their problems, which sound a lot like mine. Maybe that's what I should do."

Hell, even before I came out I occasionally joked (to myself), "Man, now so-and-so's trans, and so-and-so is trans. Who's gonna be next, me??"

Lol.

Its is so sad they couldnt even begin to know how we really feel because they so self obsessed in begin the centre of attention they will fake anything!! I have had people tell me their sisters were the charlies angels and stupid thing like that its sad when people seek attention through lying. All it will do is cause the "cried wolf to many times" effect.

Quote from: emil on July 29, 2011, 05:50:06 PMthen of course there's always the claim that young girls want to find male privilege and thus decide they want to be boys.

I have a lesbian friend who claims transitioning was sweeping through her social circles in S.F.  She also claims they're seeking male privilege.  Apparently she was presumptuously asked on more than one occasion when she was planning to start transitioning and had to explain that she didn't have any such plans.  I think that might have been what set her off onto a somewhat negative viewpoint and feeling like it was trendy.  She's pretty admittedly on the butch side of lesbian with a short haircut, being a carpenter, starting bar brawls for fun, (Just kidding about that last part.  That's my now-deceased aunt, God rest her soul.) but says she very much likes being female.

Quote from: Nezhi on July 29, 2011, 04:35:27 PM
More FTMs open on youtube, with their channel = trend.
Being FTM = not a trend.

I think this does relate to a question that was frequently discussed on Susans several years ago. "If there are supposed to be as many FtMs as there are MtFs, why don't we seen them posting anywhere?" Fast forward to today and the answer is that they are here and they are posting.

Quote from: Ryan J on July 30, 2011, 04:32:52 PM
A lot of young people see their peers and think, "Well coming out solved their problems, which sound a lot like mine. Maybe that's what I should do."

Hell, even before I came out I occasionally joked (to myself), "Man, now so-and-so's trans, and so-and-so is trans. Who's gonna be next, me??"

Lol.

Actually trans people suffer same health issues as rest of society.  After you transition you still have all life issues.  E makes me feel better than T but my clothing is rather in between.  You are trans by your feelings inside not by your clothes.  Clothes are just an outward expression and also change with times.

I would love for males to just wear pretty things and it be cool.  I like positive attention but not negative attention. 

I would be interested in FTM's opinion of wearing "pretty" clothes.  Do you think it is cool and wear them or just "not male" so that you will not do that?

Quote from: LilKittyCatZoey on July 30, 2011, 02:57:40 PM
funny enough i had this girl friend she told everyone she was gonna be a boy and call herself (insert boy name) and everyone went thats nice, didnt really give her attention about it. so about 1 month later she was (girl name again) and Denys ever saying she wanted to be a boy.......... Sad that some people use a curse to get attention.

well I do sometimes put lies on me who cause attention but it manly because I don't like to tell the trust.
ex I have told people I got a illness with my lungs but the trust is I been binding since I where a teen
and that's why there so damaged. generally I don't like to tell people so I just say I got a "illness." I know i'm so bad.. hehe
---------
im sorry if this gonna be a little of topic I just write whats on my mind.

I have a couple of people who said they wanted to be a guy/girl not nessesarry as being trans.
it can annoy me endless in some cases,
I love people who are open about themself, as being manly femenine, trans, crossdresser, genderqueer or whatever,
but people should do it because of them self and not just to be cool.. (its also annoy me before getting out I where like
"wow your so cool because your so boyish" and now there like "your so girly I don't want to be with you" )
in the end I think someone who put up with this only for other people gonna pay the hardest prize because its really not easy to be diffrent specially not in your gender.
--
but the "funny" thing is, its everywhere that people try to fit in, or look smarter than they are not just in this case.
a time ago I felt strange because I where hanging a little out with people from the alternative comunety.
you know, people who dress as they like and in many ways, cyber, punk,goth, and whatever..
my feelings of the word "alternative" is to be people who just want to be them self and not following fashion, or the pattern other want to or think is cool, (please correct me if i'm wrong but that's my view of it)
still, I felt not all got that view and underneath the blue hair they where still somehow only fitting in where they could and the only alternative with them where the alternative style but there mind where still focusing on fitting in.
its hard to explain but ex I where sitting close to one of my friends who are a virgin and
said she where proud of it in a conversation with another girl,
the other girl said she shouldn't be proud of it because she lost her virginity at the age of 14.
well
my friend are 16, and I thought there's really nothing wrong with her being a virgin and being proud about it. (its not even that abnormal in her age) but there little conversation made me feel so strange.. because, if she where really just being herself, not minding about fitting in,
then why would she mind other to fit in in her pattern? refering someone to lose there virginity because it where uncool to be a virgin when you where "that old"?
for me that sounded like someone who just wanted to fit in, and made other fit in not thinking about how she feel, or the fact shes actually happy and proud of being a virgin and its not something shes wasn't sad about at all and still she dont like it because its uncool?..
for me its not much diffrent form so many other people. whatever its a matter of alcohol, fashion, sexualety and so on, theres a presure of fitting in and be cool.

it really made me think...










 

I had a tumblr for a week, but it was irritating because it seemed like EVERYBODY on there was flaunting that they were genderqueer or trans - mostly FTM. I don't get it. I thought that if you were a transgender guy, you didn't want people to know you were female.
I have a "friend" who is, truthfully, only "friends" with me because I'm trans. She has 10+ "transguys" as friends, all who flaunt it to the extreme and dress as feminine as possible. I'm really trying to not sound rude, but I don't get it. If you're a transguy, I would think that you would stay away from girl clothes and whatnot, but the transguy that my "friend" is practically in love with dresses in Hollister girl clothes, skirts, pink wigs, and then gets mad when someone calls them a girl.
Then again, they hate me because they think I'm being "stereotypically" male. I'm a dude. I'm masculine. I didn't know I was trying to be a stereotype. I'm sorry I don't want to strut down a street in bright wigs and girls clothes and get stared at like you do. He LOVES attention though, apparently. Ironically.
Another transguy I know is apparently having an identity crisis, in his own words, because he doesn't know if he's transgender or genderqueer. Am I the only one who has never had an identity crisis? When I found out what being trans meant, I was all, "Holy ->-bleeped-<-, that's me." I had a difficult time trying to be a girl.
I hate when people find out that I'm trans. I don't want to be trans. Being trans sucks ass. I'm just a guy - that's all I want to be.
On another note, can someone explain the whole genderqueer thing to me?
I'm trying to understand it, but I just don't. I understand being a girl in a boy's body or vice versa due to a hormonal imbalance in the womb, but how can you feel like both or neither? Not to mention, the only time I ever see a genderqueer is on tumblr and they're female-bodied with gauges, poorly dyed hair, etc.


Edit:// I feel like I should note that I don't have a problem with transguy who are feminine.

I think its more like you feel like both, than feeling like 'neither.'

Tumblr is not exactly a good representation of the general population - I went on there *because* it seemed like that's where all the FTMs were hanging out.  Maybe because it seems so much more anonymous than most other social networking sites.  I think once a topic reaches a certain critical mass over there, like that or Glee or Harry Potter, it exerts its own gravitational force and sucks in more of the same.

FTMs aren't trending, information is.  You haven't really arrived until you've got your own awareness ribbon!   

Quote from: Devyn on July 31, 2011, 02:42:15 PM
I had a tumblr for a week, but it was irritating because it seemed like EVERYBODY on there was flaunting that they were genderqueer or trans - mostly FTM. I don't get it. I thought that if you were a transgender guy, you didn't want people to know you were female.
I have a "friend" who is, truthfully, only "friends" with me because I'm trans. She has 10+ "transguys" as friends, all who flaunt it to the extreme and dress as feminine as possible. I'm really trying to not sound rude, but I don't get it. If you're a transguy, I would think that you would stay away from girl clothes and whatnot, but the transguy that my "friend" is practically in love with dresses in Hollister girl clothes, skirts, pink wigs, and then gets mad when someone calls them a girl.
Then again, they hate me because they think I'm being "stereotypically" male. I'm a dude. I'm masculine. I didn't know I was trying to be a stereotype. I'm sorry I don't want to strut down a street in bright wigs and girls clothes and get stared at like you do. He LOVES attention though, apparently. Ironically.
Another transguy I know is apparently having an identity crisis, in his own words, because he doesn't know if he's transgender or genderqueer. Am I the only one who has never had an identity crisis? When I found out what being trans meant, I was all, "Holy ->-bleeped-<-, that's me." I had a difficult time trying to be a girl.
I hate when people find out that I'm trans. I don't want to be trans. Being trans sucks ass. I'm just a guy - that's all I want to be.
On another note, can someone explain the whole genderqueer thing to me?
I'm trying to understand it, but I just don't. I understand being a girl in a boy's body or vice versa due to a hormonal imbalance in the womb, but how can you feel like both or neither? Not to mention, the only time I ever see a genderqueer is on tumblr and they're female-bodied with gauges, poorly dyed hair, etc.


Edit:// I feel like I should note that I don't have a problem with transguy who are feminine.

I'd like to point out that not every trans* person has an "a-ha moment" about being trans. For some people it's a process and others, they've known forever. I'd be careful to pass judgement on those having an "identity crisis" as your friend puts it. Everyone's journey is there own and no less valid than any yours. I have a friend who feels like they are both, but does consider themselves transgender. I can't quite explain why since I don't think that's my place and frankly, can't explain why someone else feels that way. What I will say is I don't think it's any less valid then someone claiming to be a transman. I consider the word transgender to be an umbrella term for all gender variants anyway.

I see some judgement on this thread as to what trans is and isn't. Who is and who isn't. I guess I kind-of opened that can of worms by asking the question. I would like to see some of these tumblr kids in 10 years though.

You know what, it bother me too sometimes.  I even had a facebook friend who was transgender for a month and than changed HER mind.  I knew her before my transition so she knows my story.  She changed her name and gender to male in her profile, cut her hair, wore male clothing and posted trans related links.  Then one day she was back to her old self and refused to talk about what happened.  It was really strange.

It got under my skin because it seemed she was invalidating my experience.  Also I'm not sure how she regards me now, since it was so easily thrown aside for her.  Worse yet, it hurts the transgender cause when outsiders see people claiming to be trans one day and than changing their mind.  It really makes it all seem like a choice.  You don't see people backtracking to much in homosexual circles.  At least not with gay men. 

Then I thought more about it and decided that she was entitled to her own experience and her own journey.  The choices she makes does NOT reflect on the choices I make for myself.  If other people think her choices define me, that's their problem, not mine.

There are plenty of young teens out there trying out the FTM route who will end up going back to female.   I can say that with certainty because that is the way it is.  That's good for them, that's fine for them.  They are attempting to figure themselves and they should be allowed to do it.  I will respect whatever pronoun people ask me to say and think.  Even if I do think in the back of my head that it is a phase.   There is a very good chance I might be wrong.

Everyone defines their own experience.  It's not up to me to make up their minds for them.  In the end most will find their correct path.  Now, then and after they will have my support no matter what they choose.  It doesn't matter because I just like people.             

Quote from: Devyn on July 31, 2011, 02:42:15 PM
On another note, can someone explain the whole genderqueer thing to me?
I'm trying to understand it, but I just don't. I understand being a girl in a boy's body or vice versa due to a hormonal imbalance in the womb, but how can you feel like both or neither?

Sounds like a good question to ask the androgynes on this site.

Quote from: Alexmakenoise on July 31, 2011, 05:37:06 PM
Sounds like a good question to ask the androgynes on this site.

Perhaps I will.