Susan's Place Logo

News:

Visit our Discord server  and Wiki

Main Menu

Is ->-bleeped-<- becoming a fad?

Started by Xybergeist, August 20, 2011, 01:16:05 AM

Previous topic - Next topic

0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic.

Xybergeist

For a while now, i feel that transgenders (FtMs mainly) have become a fad, i mean it's like how everyware i look on the internet, are all wanting to become men, not just that but, gay men, girl-crossdressing transmen, even "bisexual and/or gay boi sometimes crossdressing transman" , i mean i'm ok with that, but it's when friends who are suddenly all 'i am totally a male inside and an effeminate male too, and want to have sex with ex-ex-gay men because i like yaoi it's hawt", then after a year she wasn't really bothered because she didn't feel like it anymore. Another one i know, a butch lesbian, was thinking of going through transition so she could get married as a male on the certificate.
In all honesty, I never wanted to be part of the GLBT community, i support it all the way, but i hate being a transmale, i just want to be male, born one, but i know i have to know i have to go through surgery to be happier. I did join this website though since people seemed more serious about it.

I've tried keeping quiet with this because i felt like i was judging people, because it's alright to be who you want, but when it comes to a point where girls suddenly feel like being a male because of a hunch and their friend did, when alot of us had gone through our whole lives feeling like we're in the wrong body. it kind of puts me really down, it also kind of makes me feel worse that i came out after hiding it for years, a little while after the girl who didn't take it seriously, then people thought i copied her.

I really don't want to seem terrible, and i guess i really shouldn't judge the person unless i met them, but i didn't know where else to talk about this.
Is ->-bleeped-<- a popular trend these days? It would be good to know from the experts.

  •  

Gravity Girl

Lets be honest now, despite becoming more understood, within the rather hetronormative binary western world, gender is still the last taboo. there are plenty of people who question their gender at some point in their lives and used the fact that it's taboo to make a statement. This does not make there questioning of their gender identity less valid or indeed yours...the people who are going to transition will, while those that are just exploring as it were won't. Which is why that year is quite important...even though I absolutely hate being in this inbetween limbo.

Besides I feel exactly the same way about hipster [expletive]s who cruise around on long boards acting like complete [expletive]'s and think 20mph is quick. They give those of us who actually give a damn about the sport a bad name, but seeing as I can't go push each and everyone of them down a 40mph hill all I can do is make sure I'm polite and friendly to the people who tar me with the same brush.
  •  

Alexmakenoise

This is something that happens when a new idea is introduced to mainstream thought.  People explore it.  Some try it on for size, some reject it, many make jokes about it, and the few of us who were familiar with it to begin with roll our eyes and bemoan its many new incarnations.  Next thing we know, it will be "normal", and so will we.
  •  

eshaver

WOW, I must be in a very small part of the U. S. here as I've had a lot of health issues and haven't been to many other places in the last couple of years . This is Bothersome to say the very least . Hell, I wouldn't wish being "Trans " on anyone !!!!!!!!! ellen
See ya on the road folks !!!
  •  

ativan

Quote from: Alexmakenoise on August 20, 2011, 09:47:30 AM
This is something that happens when a new idea is introduced to mainstream thought.  People explore it.  Some try it on for size, some reject it, many make jokes about it, and the few of us who were familiar with it to begin with roll our eyes and bemoan its many new incarnations.  Next thing we know, it will be "normal", and so will we.
Used to be abnormal to even talk about it. I like the, 'yeah? so?', attitudes much better.
  •  

Torn1990

I believe more people are just feeling safer coming out as transgender nowa'days.
queer, transgender woman, Feminist, & writer. ~
  •  

Cindy Stephens

I have no trouble with someone who needs surgery to transition.  I don't have a problem with someone, "trying it on for size."  I am a bit afraid that some will make physical changes that they come to regret.  The current regret rate is very low, because it was so difficult to do in the past and the ramifications were so extreme.  Today, some get so much affirmation and support that I could easily see the error rate going up.  Some threads on some websites actively encourage lying to gatekeepers.  At least a poorly chosen or misplaced (even misspelled) tattoo can be removed or covered up with makeup.  Going mtf is pretty permanent.  I am in no way questioning the need or identity of some who transition.  Unfortunately surgery is often presented as the first and only solution.  I don't want to stop anyone, just present the seriousness of the decision.  I mean cops get confused, easily swayed people to confess to murder all the time.  Some people are that lonely for acceptance that they don't think first, then regret with leisure.  Again, this is not a slam against transition, but please, read some of the questions from kids asking if they are "really trans."  I hope that this hasn't offended anyone.
  •  

Vincent E.S.

I haven't really seen any signs of it being a fad. Where I live, breaking gender norms at all is frowned upon. That said, there were two girls I knew who did do and say things simply in an effort to be rebellious.
One girl had a few older family members who wanted her to be a girl in makeup and pretty dress, so, out of spite, she tried to appear as androgynous as possible. She failed at androgyny, but in the end she moved further away from those family members and has been living happily with lots of makeup and... pretty dresses. Even though she enjoyed the things they wanted her to do, she went through a stage where she was trying to be rebellious in every way. I don't particularly mind that because she wasn't claiming to be transgendered, she was exploring the way she presented herself.
The other girl seriously did do the 'because i like yaoi it's hawt' thing. She actually talked a lot about how she was going to go to a "->-bleeped-<- doctor" to have top surgery done so that she could "run around with my shirt off shouting, 'I'm a pretty boy!'" and then make "yaoi films". All of that stuff just infuriated me. She wasn't transgender/transsexual/gender-variant/whatever-other-word-you-want-to-use; she was just some crazy girl saying those things to get attention.
  •  

yaka

I doubt the people who are transitioning as a trend get far in their transition - no way would any fad be worth the discrimination one faces as a transgender.
I notice it more as an online thing rather than in real life. It reminds me of the bisexuality/pansexuality trend.
  •  

RomanAlexander

I identify as an effeminate transguy. For me it's not a phase at all or a fad. I've felt like this since i was 9 years old.  The feeling has never gone away. I've been able to repress it for a few months at a time, but the feeling always surfaces itself again, and every time that it comes back it hits harder than it did the last time. No, I do not fit the stereotype of a typical man, and I never will. I plan to go to beauty school after I graduate to become a hair stylist, I love dressing up and looking good, I like to sew and knit. I could go on and on about all the things that don't make me a "Real Man" or "trans enough" in our society, or even in the trans community. But I never decided to just blindly jump on the band wagon because all of a sudden Chaz Bono has a documentary and a book out. I feel like the only way that I will ever be happy, the only way I'll ever be able to function in society, and the only way that I'll be able to have healthy relationships with people, both platonic and otherwise, is if I can transition medically and socially so that I can be accepted as a man. Not as transgender, but as a man.
  •  

valkyrie256

I wouldn't really call it a fad around here. At most, we have a student who is a drag queen, and will even crossdress in public sometimes, but still firmly identifies as male. Additionally, the GSA has ran a few drag shows. I have no idea how popular they actually are.  I only know two transgendered individuals in person, both FtM. One is just some random guy I've spoken with a few time, who attended my University, then dropped out, but still hangs around. The other is my boyfriend, who I met at my University.

I agree that attitudes are lightening up ever so slightly, and people are perhaps becoming a little more comfortable coming out, but I still don't think people would consider it "cool" to be part of a group that receives a great deal of discrimination and criticism from a large part of society.
Pansexual.
Atheist.
Stoic.
Nerd.
Anything else?
  •  

Xybergeist

Thankyou all who replied, i thought it was only me who kinda noticed this.
I understand very well that they won't be that way forever, Also i do know very well that you don't have to be a stereotypical man to be a MAN, honestly i've got the personality of a timid little child and i know men who are the same, because no man is the same. It's just those who are in it for the rebbelion/shock factor you know? Also i am on the internet, and the numbers of certain people always seem larger, even though we are all split across the world.
thankyou all
  •  

gennee

#12
Whenever some thing goes mainstream, it becomes 'official'. People question themselves from time to time and that's good. Being trans certainly isn't faddish. It's who I am. I agree that it isn't the taboo it once was but being trans runs much deeper than fads, clothing, or feelings at the moment.                                                                                                         


Gennee
Be who you are.
Make a difference by being a difference.   :)

Blog: www.difecta.blogspot.com
  •  

Luc

Transgendered people have always been around. However, as being trans becomes more widely accepted, we are seeing far more publicity about it. This is not a "fad", it's a sign of acceptance. If it seems that every news story is talking about someone wanting to transition, it's quite likely because trans people who would otherwise have stayed in the shadows are now feeling confident to let people know who they are and what's going on with them. I, personally, didn't know what it was to be trans until I was 18 and saw Boys Don't Cry. Did Boys Don't Cry make me trans? Hell no! It just alerted me to the answers I was seeking. However, because of rampant transphobia and lack of information at the time, I didn't have any way of looking further into transition until I was 23. I say the more news on us, as long as it's positive, the better! Do we really want to be the tiniest minority on earth, and therefore stay in the closet forever? I know I certainly don't.
"If you want to criticize my methods, fine. But you can keep your snide remarks to yourself, and while you're at it, stop criticizing my methods!"

Check out my blog at http://hormonaldivide.blogspot.com
  •  

Torn1990

It would deeply piss me off if being transgender became a fad because we struggle so much just to identify while these assumed others are appropriating our struggles, for the sake of it being a fad? That sounds absolutely ridiculous and so is this dialogue. not that discussing this is ridiculous, I just don't think it is true. As I stated above i feel more people are feeling safer coming out. These are just later drawn thoughts and not a reaction to anyone's post.
queer, transgender woman, Feminist, & writer. ~
  •  

Pica Pica

People have often played with visual ->-bleeped-<-, especially certain hipster circles - and those hipster circles break out, get lots of headlines and copycats for a while. I don't think identity can be a trend though, unless more people are raised in ways that are all of a sudden springing out as people with trans-identities, but I doubt it.
'For the circle may be squared with rising and swelling.' Kit Smart
  •  

RebeccaFog


It is probably better that people can explore who they are more freely now in most places. The younger a person is when they question who they are, the less likely they'll have gender issues as baggage later. I would think. If some people appear frivolous about it, that's okay too. Everyone is different.

Another good thing is that the people who explore their gender while young may be better about accepting it if their children do the same thing.

I think
  •  

eshaver

Let me share something I found interesting at a Hospital I visit here , ( VCU ) . I was talking with a new doctor who was surprised in my answer that I said I wasn't Gay as I was dressed as usual in a skirt suit and low heels . She asked me what preference I had . I said I had none as the medication I had been on has taken away all of what ever sexual appetite I had ................. ellen
See ya on the road folks !!!
  •  

PidgeTPN

This will sound far more rude than I mean it to, I warn you now.

Looking at the first post, it seems you think that anyone identifying as FTM that wants to stay feminine isn't trans, and if they consider themselves gay men that they're not trans. Or any FTMs who call themselves cross dressers or Queens.

I'm an effeminate gay Queen FTM, and here is why: I want to be a pretty man, not a pretty woman. I want to keep my general looks, not my born bits. FTMs/MTFs come in MANY different types.

There are also a lot of young FTMs who treat it as a fad because they don't know how else to go about it, and stop "being trans" because they don't have the support to feel they're allowed to be themselves.
  •  

Taka

Quote from: Xybergeist on August 20, 2011, 01:16:05 AM
'i am totally a male inside and an effeminate male too, and want to have sex with ex-ex-gay men because i like yaoi it's hawt", then after a year she wasn't really bothered because she didn't feel like it anymore. Another one i know, a butch lesbian, was thinking of going through transition so she could get married as a male on the certificate.
while the lesbian sounds like she has quite a lot of problems leading her to consider transitioning, the yaoi fangirl made me lol. yaoi really is a fad, i'm sure it doesn't make too many girls wish they were a man, but i've seen enough girls who want to have sex with gay men, and being a man would definitely make that easier. i wondered for a while if i too was only affected by yaoi, but in the end i realized that can't be it. i've always been different, not only after becoming a fan of interesting genres
  •