So, a bit of background information --- I have been with my wife for 11 years now (well Aug2nd it will be) and last Oct. I came out to her as transgender.  We started counseling in March.   She has been very controlling of my transition - but I love her so much that the thought of living without her is too painful to imagine.   We also have a son who is an ftm - who started medically transitioning a year ago.

Well, the past couple weeks she has made progress -- she has started using male pronouns and refering to me as a guy.   Today - she said she is ready for me to start using my male name --- Robert Scott --- I am so excited!!!  She also said she would be okay with me having top surgery this year since we have reached our deductible --- super jazzed.

YAY!
That is very exciting to hear.
I am so happy for you.
~hugz~

Quote from: Robert Scott on June 29, 2011, 01:09:51 PM
So, a bit of background information --- I have been with my wife for 11 years now (well Aug2nd it will be) and last Oct. I came out to her as transgender.  We started counseling in March.   She has been very controlling of my transition - but I love her so much that the thought of living without her is too painful to imagine.   We also have a son who is an ftm - who started medically transitioning a year ago.

Well, the past couple weeks she has made progress -- she has started using male pronouns and refering to me as a guy.   Today - she said she is ready for me to start using my male name --- Robert Scott --- I am so excited!!!  She also said she would be okay with me having top surgery this year since we have reached our deductible --- super jazzed.

That's great that she is letting you go ahead but I am not understanding why she was willing to let a child transition but is controlling you in such a way. 

It's a bit out of her hands with our son ... he's an adult who lives a state away

I think the hard part of the transition is coming to terms with the fact that people will view us as an hetrosexual couple and she is proud to be a lesbian.  She also is attracted to a female body ... and is unsure of the body changes and if it will make me unattractive to her.

That's a very interesting situation, but that's great you're able to still be with her and move forward instead of backwards. Congrats.

Quote from: Da Monkey on July 26, 2011, 09:41:21 AM
That's a very interesting situation, but that's great you're able to still be with her and move forward instead of backwards. Congrats.

I agree with this. 

Good news that your wife is coming to terms with your changes.  Maybe she can look at it as you being the ultimate Butch, at least for a while.
Also, there is the consolation, for her if not for you, that phalloplasty is not advanced enough at the moment to give you functional male genitals.  Your body will not be totally alien to her.
Hope it keeps getting better for you.

Karen.

Well, I have had some medical issues --- so currently I can't even take T --- hopefully in the next month or so it will be sorted out and I can start hormones.

Currently, I don't plan on having bottom surgery. 

She is doing great with my transition --- she gave me a watch for our anniversary with Robert engraved on it.

Then, for my birthday (they were days apart)  she gave me a pocket knife.  I once told a story about how as a kid I always wanted a pocket knife b/c I always saw my dad with one and then when my brothers got older he gave them one.  So, she got me one.

Good luck, Robert!

Transition is very hard on relationships, for sure.  Hang in there.


Jay

Good luck Rob! It sounds like your wife is being awesome about it all Hope the month goes by quick!

Happy Birthday Rob.  Definitely sounds like she is accepting the situation, Engraved gifts show a lot of thought.
Karen.

YAY super happy for ya!