Ask/Tell

    Sep. 22nd, 2011 at 11:15 PM
Alexandra Billings

http://abillings.livejournal.com/601439.html

Freedom isn't an expression. Freedom is a breath.

From the time I can remember, the world looked at me, laid claim to me, and began directing my life. Everyone around me told me in no uncertain terms what I was supposed to do, who I was supposed to love, and how I was supposed to play. None of it seemed right. None of it fit. None of it filled me up, but I was trapped with no way out. There was nothing anyone could do to help me, and my silence deafened even me. My voice laid dormant for years and the more that happened, the more that festered, the more I ran.

[...]

My parents didn't speak to me for years after I told them I was Transgender. They went through their own transition, and they needed time, as I did, to collect themselves, to make sure it wasn't some phase, and to heal. To survive what they thought were these gigantic mistakes they made. And so, for a while, there were several lonely Holidays.