I am used to weman being attracked to me. They are looking at me but it feels like they are looking at what I am wearing. I think they think I'm gay. I took my youngest son with me to the mail to day to get some clothes. My son kept call me dad and the looks on the girls faces change when they realized I wasn't gay. All I could think is I'm going take him everwhere with me. Lol. You should have seen the looks on their faces it was not of disgust. I miss women checking me out and well I am sick of men looking. I don't think I would care if they were straight men. I hope I'm not saying something upseting. Transitioning is about going from fisically looking like a male to looking female. My mannerisms have change even facial expressions and many other things. I'm very comfertable with  the changes in my life except for the sexual attraction. I no longer feel like a woman trap in a man's body. I feel like a lesbian trap in a gay man's body.

But wait, lesbians are women and gay men are men, so it sounds that you still feel like a woman trapped in a man's body. I feel like that all the time these days as well. It really puts a lot of weight and self loathing on my shoulders. I know I can only live in my own little hell if it keeps up, but knowing that it IS my own little hell works, and doesn't necessarily reflect the real world. Transition takes a lot of courage I think and it might help to think about it in these ways. It's easier to deal with the rest of the world versus dealing with the rest of the world and yourself at the same time.

Your heart and soul are attractive to me if that helps

Quote from: Amazon D on September 25, 2011, 06:54:14 AM
Your heart and soul are attractive to me if that helps

Took the words right out of my mouth (or the keys from under my fingers!).

You have an incredible amount of inner beauty. Let that radiate from within you and shine on into the world. Yes, we all have minor setbacks every now and then, things don't always go to plan or the way we want it to, but please don't let it get to you or sway the way you are.

Love yourself, and others will love you. Believe in yourself, and others will believe in you. You hold the power, Jainie, use that power.

You are still a woman trapped inside a man, but that woman is coming out. She's beautiful and will attract love and happiness into your life, honest!

Give yourself some time, hun. If I've learnt anything in my short life thus far, it's that things always work out in the end.

Love,
Karlee.x

@Amazon D and Karlee, thinks.

That means more to me than you may know. Sometimes knowing that others can see through this false image of me to my true image shows the true love that is hide.

I know Amazon D we have talk on the phone. If the words were taken out of your mouth by her than I may know you too. You said, love yourself and others will love you. This is true and it runs deeper than you may know. You said, believe in yourself and others will believe in you. This also is true and it runs along the same path as love. You can't seperate faith and love they always are found together. Know yourself and others will know you.
Who believes IN you Karlee? Your words say you know this even if you think you don't know the answer you will.
You write like a poet your words are as a deep well to my soul. When I was thirsty you gave me a drink for that I am thinkful. My love for you is in you even as your love for me is in me.