A year or so ago, well for a while now really, I"ve really felt that i was a Ftm, like the thought of it was really strong, i felt a wave of relief whenever i am able to dress masculinely, pass once in a while and acknowledge my voice is a bit deeper than an average females.  But lately, as i decided to come out to a FEW selected friends, Its like that "so-sure" feeling is slowly fading away a little..and just so much confusion has aroused. I know going to a gender therapist would be best, but i cant drive yet, nor can i financially support myself... ultimately, i feel kind of androgynous now, but still slightly leaning towards being trans. So my question is, has anyone else felt or gone through this?

Honestly, just be you and stop trying to put a label on yourself this very second. Some people know their gender identity right away, and some people have to give it a lot of time and thought. I don't think that makes it any less valid. I've been trying to figure myself out for like 3 years now, and the more I try to force a label, the more confused I get. I too thought I might be FTM at one point, and right now I'm going with genderqueer, but who knows how I'll end up. Also know that you might be more in the middle or the gray area of things. You don't have to be strictly male or female, just like you don't have to be super masculine to be FTM. Maybe you're more of a genderqueer or androgynous guy. Just give yourself lots of time and space to think about it and try not to worry about it too much. A therapist would probably help with this, maybe you could ask your folks? I dunno. Just know that you're not alone man  Good luck!!

I agree with everything that Konnor said. 
Just don't rush yourself.  You'll figure it out in time.  Just keep thinking about it, and experiencing things.  For me, when I thought I could very likely be trans, I wanted to test that theory.  So I went out and bought male clothes and walked around in public and hand some people take me for a male.  And the way that experience made me feel just confirmed my theory for me.  and I knew.
So hang in there.  You'll just know someday as well. 

It can take a few years before u figure it out, or not.. For me I knew i was transgender at the age of 19 by 24 I knew I was FTM. By 26 I started taking T, now I'm 29 and next year I'm getting surgery. As u can see it was a process me.

Labels aren't everything, and our perception of gender is always changing. Some people feel comfortable sticking to one label their entire life. Others feel male one day, female another, or neither or both (some people label this as genderfluid). But what matters in the end is that you are YOU, and labels are for jars. 

Ah, yeah i guess i shouldn't be in such a rush, thanks for all the responses everyone

I did the opposite, personally. I thought I was androgyn for a while. But I slowly became more and more comfortable with being seen as a male and less and less comfortable with being seen as female. I'd hated my body for almost as long as I can remember, but I guess my original perception of "male" was just too stereotyped to the agressive men in my family.
I've tried to label myself, heterosexual, panromantic, ftm transsexual, metrosexual, closet-crossdresser. In the end. It'd take less time to just introduce myself and let someone really get to know me. Forget labels. Just be you and do whatever makes you comfortable.

Quote from: TheAwesomePrussia on October 07, 2011, 06:59:14 PM
I did the opposite, personally. I thought I was androgyn for a while. But I slowly became more and more comfortable with being seen as a male and less and less comfortable with being seen as female. I'd hated my body for almost as long as I can remember, but I guess my original perception of "male" was just too stereotyped to the agressive men in my family.
I've tried to label myself, heterosexual, panromantic, ftm transsexual, metrosexual, closet-crossdresser. In the end. It'd take less time to just introduce myself and let someone really get to know me. Forget labels. Just be you and do whatever makes you comfortable.

That's very similar to how I've felt/what I've gone through.

OP, you're not odd though, I've been seeing a lot of people with similar feelings on tumblr.

Yea. I've noticed a lot of people feel a tendency to lean towards androgyn for a while. For some it's the answer, for others it's just a safe middle spot. But just looking at your gender at all is a big step. Trust me, you'll spend the rest of your life figuring out who you are. So take your time and don't rush it or feel the need to pin it down. People change a lot, and they discover a lot of different things up until the day they die or go senile. You've likely got plenty of time to find you.