I really need to decide on a name.
It's difficult, because although my name does carry gender connotations for me, it also feels like a part of who I am - it's what my friends and loved ones have always called me.
Still, a male name will be an important part of assuming my real gender identity. And it's also rather exciting. A bit like picking out new wallpaper, LOL (not to trivialise it, but it does have that giddy re-decorating-the-place feeling - like, 'I'm going to make this room like I've always wanted it')!
I reckon it's sensible to keep my initials, so my first name'll have to begin with 'A' and my middle name with 'M'. The 'M' is easy - my beloved late Grandpa's name was 'Michael,' so I'm going to go with that.
The 'A' is proving more difficult.
My progress so far:
Alvin - meaning, 'Friend of all.' Quite cute. Also rather 'rad.' But I'm not a friend of all. I'm a friend of fairly few. Also, I'd feel like a chipmunk.
Alfie - meaning, 'Wise counsel of the elf.' Adorable-sounding name. But I'm not sure I'm wise enough to counsel elves. Assuming I could even find them, I wouldn't be sure what kind of counsel to give them, or even whether I'd be able to speak their language. Assuming they'd want to talk about their feelings, their childhood and their interpersonal relationships, I'd feel the cultural differences to be too much of a roadblock to offering them sage advice.
Algie - meaning, 'With a moustache.' The pressure to grow a moustache would be immense. Plus, I'd sound like a green pond growth.
Alan - meaning 'Rock.' The pressure to become a wrestler would be immense.
Alec - meaning, 'Protector of men.' I'd prefer to protect women and children.
Archie - meaning, 'Very bold.' I'd feel obliged to find a middle name meaning, 'very italic.'
Angelo - meaning, 'Messenger of God.' I am angelic. Though I'd feel like a Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle.
I just don't know