Wow!
OhMaiGawd!
I went for my blood draw today. Being a fasting draw, I wanted to do it first thing in the morning. But I popped awake at 3:30 am and couldn't get back to sleep, so at 6:30 I was the first car to pull into a parking space in front of the lab that would open at 7.
I tried to read, but the sleep monster that was elusive earlier found me and I nodded in and out for the next 20 minutes. I did notice a car arrive about 3 minutes after I started courting Mr. Sleep Monster. I nodded in and out.
At about 7 minutes to, I heard some Cummins diesel engines approach, idle and stop. First out of his truck was a construction worker dressed in the International Orange Don't-mess-with-me construction worker teeshirt. He walked briskly to the door, followed by his buddies. Others who had been waiting in their cars got out and started lining up.
I got out of my car and thought to myself, "Ya snooze, ya lose". Oh, well, life's not fair -- I'll get some reading done waiting my turn.
One of the men standing around said to me, "That's not right, ma'am, you were here first, you should be a the head of the line. I was the second to arrive, so I know."
I thanked him and told him not to worry -- if the three guys driving pickups with dualies and budd wheels wanted to go first, let them.
"No," he said, "That's not right! You should go first!" And he kept saying that over my protests, getting louder and louder, while I kept protesting that life's unfair and if the three guys at the head of the line wanted first that much, they were welcome to have it -- it's fine with me!
Finally, he addressed Orange Shirt directly, "Buddy, the lady was here first, let her go first!"
"**** ***, go to hell", said Orange Shirt. Now I was begging him to just give it up, as he was telling Orange he'd be waiting outside for him.
The lone lab technician opened the door and Orange strode purposely to the sign-in sheet -- and White-Knight follows him in and starts shoving and trying to get the sign-in sheet away from Orange and to me. The lab tech was freaked, to say the least, I'm still protesting to just leave it be, and the two are using language I remember well from my Marine Corps days.
They both go outside, followed by the two other workers that came with Orange. Someone makes the observation they might be drawing blood samples on each other in the street. But they each get in their separate vehicles and roar off.
I'm still quietly freaking...
I'm called to the counter to take care of the paperwork, and I hand her the order form. As I'm still changing IDs over, the form has my old name on it, and the clerk asks (LOUDLY!, it seems) if I'm using {old_name} and I'm thinking, "Now someone's gonna figure me out from that male name." More internal freaking. But I think she realized she was outing me, and the rest of the conversation implied but skirted that issue.
Finally -- "Karen?", and I go back into the draw area of the lab. My tech was the hapless one who had the almost-fight spill into her lobby when she opened the door. She apologised, I apologised back, and then I said, "I was really worried -- what if those guys had found out the TRUTH about me?", and we both start laughing at the absurdity of the whole episode.
We both agreed that males, as a group, are dangerous and not to be trusted.
Epilog -- On the way back to base, I got to use my new CAC card with a current picture and correct name on it. The old ID card created cognitive dissonance moments, but this time it was thank-you-ma'am-have-a-nice-day. And it was.
Karen
