Okay so my wife and I have some questions regarding oral sex for MTFs. We've been discussing starting to save up for her surgery and it's brought up some questions about how it would change our bedroom situation. We figured the best thing to do would be to ask people who may have experience in this arena. If anyone would be willing to talk about it that would be super nice of you and we'd appreciate it a lot

Mostly we have questions regarding oral sex. I've always dated women, the idea of a sex life with her after surgery is far from a turn off for me. Our first set of question is about oral sex. For anyone who's been in a lesbian relationship with a post-op transwoman or who has had a partner who you talked with and got feedback from how different is it? Basically we are thinking along the lines of similarities or differences in things like taste, smell, feel (both literally and sexually), visual appeal. We're just really curious about that stuff.

With sexual response we're also wondering how sensitivity changed for some people. We know that obviously this will be different for everyone but we're curious about what kinds of things may feel best for her. Is oral sex stimulating enough to bring you to orgasm, or have you found that you're less sensitive and it isn't really enough? And I generally assume that intercourse is stimulating enough for orgasm for most transwomen, but obviously that is just an assumption since I have no experience in this arena. From everything we've read it all seems to work out for most people but we're just wondering what the answers are directly from the women who've experienced this.

Thanks in advance to anyone willing to talk about some of these things. And of course you can feel free to PM me about it too if you'd rather talk in private.

Well, as far as sensitivity is concerned, the neoclitoris doesn't have anywheres near the number of nerves that a GG has, since it's made from part of the glans. Having fewer nerves involved during sex seems to make a big difference for the worse, in my experience.   On the other hand, we get a G-spot that can be capable of a lot of sensation.

Well, what a post. If a trans woman can reach orgasm while masturbating then I can't see why they would not reach that same point by oral stimulation. It really comes down to how sensitive the clitoris is after GRS surgery. I know some are not very to some who are very. It comes down to the success of the surgery which is an unknown until you have done it. The only safe guards you can put it place is to talk to your surgeon and express the importance of being sensate. This is what I did and WOW he did a good job, lol.

Hope that helps

Stardust   

Oh wow. Something I can really talk about!  As you know I am a long term postop ItF intersex woman who has a longterm MtF postop partner. So we are both on the page here.

Is there any difference from a natal woman in terms of taste etc? That will depend on your partners hygiene being optimal. Some of the older methods of hygiene did used to lead to problems with a slight metallic tang, and of course if the routine was sub-optimal then there could be issues with odor. I was a little less problematic in this respect than my partner because I am weird (but you knew that ) I am self lubricating which seems to help.

Thankfully these issues have now been completely solved for both of us. The regular use of probiotic pessaries of creams helps.

Visually, if you get a decent modern surgeon, it is pretty good. I needed a revision to get to the point where it looked completely right, but then I was done over 25 years back and things have moved on. It is dependent of course on what the original anatomy was like so there may be some differences, but not horrendous.

Sexually my partner and I find do each other appealing and attractive.

For both of us oral sex is plenty plenty plenty enough to bring us to orgasm. My partner doesn't like it as much as I do but yeah - it presents no problems for either of us.

I think this question of what works is a real YMMV question because different surgeons and different starting anatomy will mean that no two of us will end up the same. I have three very distinct separate erogenous areas (four if you include my breasts) the labia, the clitoris and the vagina itself. Stimulation of any of those things (or indeed my breasts) can bring me to orgasm just fine, but then I have very fine and sensitive skin. I am SUPER ticklish, so it probably doesn't take much.

I do also enjoy being penetrated.

For my partner it is more centered around her clit and she finds penetration "difficult" to enjoy. I do it sometimes, because paradoxically as a "switch" I actually also enjoy using a strapon, but I have to take extreme care. So it really does vary from one person to another.

Good news is if you love each other and are prepared to experiment to find out what works you will certainly find out something which will work for both of you.

Right I think I have said all that I can in a public thread without transgressing the rules. if you have more specific questions you want answered PM me by all means.

Is oral sex stimulating enough to bring you to orgasm?

The answer is yes.

hug
annette

50% of your sexual pleasure comes from your BRAIN actually. If a girl doesnt like oral sex (for diff reasons. for example she has insecurities or something.) even the best lover in the world wont bring her to orgasm this way. In opposite - if girl LOVES oral sex, the moment she is receiving it would be extremely pleasant for her, cause shes open for it and she loves it. Even if her partner isnt that great in giving oral sex

If I liked sex I would not of transitioned. It is smelly, dirty and uncomfortable.

First time a partner went down on me I thought he was going to have to scrape me off the ceiling. For me it is much better than masturbating and he never complained about odor or taste or anything.

Thanks for all of the feedback ladies. It sounds like in the long run there really isn't any reason to be concerned, it will all work out some way or another and we'll just have to see what works when the time comes.

Sorry we weren't around during this convo, computer issues with our internet for some reason. Finally got everything up and running today

I dont know if it is just ME or my surgeon BUT, i am HIGHLY sensitive in my labia area as well as my clitoris and g spot.  Orally, I climax over and over and my partners say i am one of the WETTEST women they have ever been with.  They say i squirt tremendously.   I cant sit still while the man performs oral sex on me.  EVERY man i have been with say they enjoy eating me more than any other woman they have ever been with because i AM highly sensitive and wet.  So all n all it is DIFFERENT with every person.  Dr Bowers did my surgery and my vagina is FULLLY and i mean FULLY functional as a NATAL female.  Everytime I have sex, I almost want to cry  because it is so euphoric that I lose my mind.  I NEVER had an orgasm prior to surgery because I never touched it but OH MY GOD, Dr. Bowers HOOKED A SISTER UP!

Oral sex shouldn't be a problem. Taste, smell, touch, looks, etc, all are good and normal -- nothing scary! LOL

Quote from: missyzanta on March 15, 2011, 12:13:44 PM
I dont know if it is just ME or my surgeon BUT, i am HIGHLY sensitive in my labia area as well as my clitoris and g spot.  Orally, I climax over and over and my partners say i am one of the WETTEST women they have ever been with.  They say i squirt tremendously.   I cant sit still while the man performs oral sex on me.  EVERY man i have been with say they enjoy eating me more than any other woman they have ever been with because i AM highly sensitive and wet.  So all n all it is DIFFERENT with every person.  Dr Bowers did my surgery and my vagina is FULLLY and i mean FULLY functional as a NATAL female.  Everytime I have sex, I almost want to cry  because it is so euphoric that I lose my mind.  I NEVER had an orgasm prior to surgery because I never touched it but OH MY GOD, Dr. Bowers HOOKED A SISTER UP!

MAN. I HOPE SHE HOOKS ME UP, I HOPE I FEEL THIS GOOD AFTER BOWERS LOL. YOUR POST HAS ME THINKING OG GOIN TO HER AND CANCELING WITH SUPORN.

Well if you do go to Suporn, you *will* be sensate. Recently I've found that my partner can make me scream.

This has been a huge concern for me, especially with my medical background. From what I understand Dr. Suporn keeps the part of the gland that isn't used for the clitoris and puts it at the end of the vagina, but it isn't attached to the dorsal nerve anymore so I'm not sure how effective that is.

-Lef

Quote from: Dàwkbua on February 26, 2011, 03:20:40 AM
Well, as far as sensitivity is concerned, the neoclitoris doesn't have anywheres near the number of nerves that a GG has, since it's made from part of the glans. Having fewer nerves involved during sex seems to make a big difference for the worse, in my experience.   On the other hand, we get a G-spot that can be capable of a lot of sensation.

Quote from: Dàwkbua on November 04, 2011, 11:38:12 AM
Well if you do go to Suporn, you *will* be sensate. Recently I've found that my partner can make me scream.

glad to hear that. im so happy you orgasm. and have a pretty vagina

depth and width is your only problem.

i would contact marcie just to get an idea of what she can do.

I have contacted her already. I know what the only option available to me is and I am not going to do it.

Quote from: Dàwkbua on November 04, 2011, 06:08:33 PM
I have contacted her already. I know what the only option available to me is and I am not going to do it.

colon?

Yes.

Quote from: Dàwkbua on November 04, 2011, 06:56:20 PM
Yes.

when you heal and feel better , go for it, i would

have u heard anything bad about marcie btw

No, I've not heard anything bad about her. But it's too late - I've had my SRS already and there are no do-overs.