i'm having a really rough time coping with the growth of my dick.
I like it -  but it makes me feel very very very self concious letting someone touch it.
i'm embarrassed at it being so different from female or male genitalia.
ive been sleeping with this girl and i'm finding it harder and harder to let her touch me.
as my dick gets bigger i have more trouble letting go

i'm just very torn and i suppose i need some help to swing me in favour of a bigger dick, help?

That is one of the effects you see and feel after starting T.  Does she understand what is happening to you since you have been on T?  Are you comfortable having this growth and new feelings down there?  This is definitely new to us, you had nothing on the outside and now you getting a little growth.  I have oftened womdered what it is like to have a penis and balls hanging there all the time; running, jumping, and other activities; what they must feel like.

Yeah she understands and she says she's cool with everything. I do enjoy the growth but at the same time it bothers me. Make me self-concious

I don't have any advice for you, just wanted to say that if I ever get on T, I am positive that I will have the same feelings about it that you do 

thats understandable, because you are torn between it being a large clit, or a small small dick. and either way you look at it, its not the typical male or female genitals.

I would say the key is to think of it as YOUR dick, its yours and it feels good, focus on all the cool stuff it does, like getting hard etc

Does it feel good when YOU touch it? If you've gotten to that, then you're at least half way to thinking about someone else touching it. I recommend visualization. If you're actually with someone who's cool with your body, that's a hell of a lot more than a lot of people have. That's a golden opportunity in my book to slowly let down your inhibitions to allow another person to make you feel good. I also suggesting turning off the light

Just let it go and enjoy it. If you've found someone that is comfortable, supportive, and care for you how you are then go with it. Let go of your hang ups and do what feels right. There is nothing more beautiful than that. On a lighter note, coming from someone who grew up with a penis you get used to it lol. Think of it as an extra appendage if you will. They can hinder your movement and walking sometimes though truth be told lol.