A friend of mine had been asking me to officiate her wedding for over two years now. Since July 2009, I happily agreed to marry her and her girlfriend this past October.

So, I did all of my papers 3 weeks in advanced (which was about 10 papers), got all my affairs in order, saved up money for the car trip from Pennsylvania to Arkansas only for her to "disappear". I was going to marry them at no charge even though it was going to cost me 200 bucks in traveling expenses plus another 200 in lodging.

As you can guess, it is now Mid November and she started to chat with me on Facebook and through email like nothing ever happened...or like I was never meant to officiate this wedding. The last time she talked about her wedding and me marrying them was just two months ago so I know she did not forget lol.

Now I realize why ministers place a down deposit on marriages.

Shouldn't that be "require" a deposit?

Something I called on in the General discussions forum ---" girl BS" :-)

Would guys do that? Nahhh, not very likely, or at least be saying, very, VERY sorry, ... or?

Axelle

yeah. She hasn't apologized yet. It's as if the last two years of discussion never happened

 

BWAHAHA!

That's just...well...rude!  At the very least, an apology is definitely in order. You don't say what happened with regard to the wedding itself, but I can think of no reason that would not have required the couple to at least let you know what was happening. Yes, weddings sometimes get postponed or cancelled. Couples sometimes decide to change ministers at the last minute. Whatever it was, they should have given you a heads up as soon as they could. It's just good manners.

Sympathies.

Quote from: Michelle. on November 16, 2011, 01:10:41 AM
Shouldn't that be "require" a deposit?

Some people have told me that I am not who I am because my postings have gramatical and typographic errors.

Jen61


What was the jesus said: he who has no sin trow the first stone, or soemthing to that effect.

Is dyslexia also a disqualifier ?

i don't understand what the last two posts have to do with the thread topic?

I now realize why Ministers place a down deposit on marriages.

So no matter what happens they still get to keep the money - or at least some of it?  Same reason that everybody else who does deposits does them.

Quote from: tekla on November 21, 2011, 10:04:08 AM
I now realize why Ministers place a down deposit on marriages.

So no matter what happens they still get to keep the money - or at least some of it?  Same reason that everybody else who does deposits does them.

Just like any other form of deposits, if you cancel ahead of time you will get your money back. If you wait until the event is about to happen and then cancel at the last minute, then you probably will not get it back or some of it.

Quote from: tekla on November 21, 2011, 10:04:08 AM
I now realize why Ministers place a down deposit on marriages.

So no matter what happens they still get to keep the money - or at least some of it?  Same reason that everybody else who does deposits does them.

In cases like this where a service is being offered, the deposit is not necessarily about the money so much as it is about ensuring that the client is serious about the arrangement and will not back out frivolously.  The deposit is often fully refundable if the arrangement is canceled with sufficient advance notice or for predefined "adequate" reasons (all spelled out in writing). Short notice or casual reasons for cancellation may result in forfeit of part or all of the deposit.

I know some computer consultants who specify a minimum number of hours (usually between 1 and 3) charged per on-site visit regardless of actual labor hours to ensure that they don't get called out (with all the attendant expenses related to the travel and lost productivity elsewhere) to reset a password and then get paid nothing because "you were only here for 5 minutes!"  It encourages the client to make sure they think about what they are asking before they ask.