I'm having my second therapy appointment tomorrow afternoon, I was very disappointed with my first one, seeing as it turned out I had actually been to this same guy 6 years ago when I originally wanted to start transitioning, but he wants me to do 12 months real life experience without hormones and I need to figure out a way to get around that,

I've already takene 6 years to decide this, I do not need a real life experience, especially not for this amount of time.  I am already out to everyone, using my male name full time and everyone around me is trying their best to remember to use correct pronounces.

I'm feeling so frustrated with my therapist and how he wants to try tell me this amount of time is mandatory and standard,  I am perfectly fine with some amount of RLE but asking me to be out there with a female voice trying to experience real life as male for 12 months is inhumane!

I just need to find some way to convince him I am not about to change my mind, I tried to change my mind for so long, I did everything before deciding I needed this, including getting married.

I just needed to rant this out

thanks for reading

Mark

Show him the SoC version 7. Does he know what you've been doing and for how long?

The standards of care are supposed to be guidance, not rules. And they do not even say you require a year of RLE before HRT anywhere.
I actually had 5-6 months of HRT before going full-time and the people who treat me do put a lot of stock in the SoC. They are flexible standards and supposed to be made to fit the individual in question.
It's indeed inhumane. you could try and point him to the workings of other gender teams (which never works) or find a more realistic therapist.

Quote from: Nygeel on December 04, 2011, 01:59:14 PM
Show him the SoC version 7. Does he know what you've been doing and for how long?

Miniar is also Icelandic and has been guiding me a bit with information and he showed me SoC version 7 and I did tell my therapist about it and asked him if he had read it, which he said he had but then said there was no changes in the real life experience requirements,  It's documented, in HIS documents that I went to see him 6 years ago about transitioning but had gone into denial which we talked briefly about, my marriage fell apart, and I fell apart and I finally went back to square 1 with him, having spent all those years constantly thinking about this and regretting not doing it, I just wasn't strong enough then, but I am now.

Quote from: Eve87 on December 04, 2011, 02:04:44 PM
The standards of care are supposed to be guidance, not rules. And they do not even say you require a year of RLE before HRT anywhere.
I actually had 5-6 months of HRT before going full-time and the people who treat me do put a lot of stock in the SoC. They are flexible standards and supposed to be made to fit the individual in question.
It's indeed inhumane. you could try and point him to the workings of other gender teams (which never works) or find a more realistic therapist.

I'm not even sure we have another therapist that deals with transgender people, I'd have to look into it, and yes RLE should be flexible and made to fit each individual, if I had only recently starting thinking about these things, I would probably welcome a good time of RLE before making this huge dramatic life altering decision, but I have already been consumed with these longing for a really long time now, and 12 months does not fit me at all, 6 months is the most I could stand, but 3 months or no months at all is what I need,

I also really do not like that people that self medicate get around this "rule" as he put it, because they would rather people medicate under doctor supervision so trying to do this the correct way, the responsible way I get punished with inhumane RLE time.

I have read through SoC 7 a bit, but I don't think I understand it to well, my english isn't fantastic, so if anyone could simplify the language in the HRT portion of it, I would be really grateful.

I know this is an obvious question, but is it possible for you to see another therapist?

Quote from: JohnAlex on December 04, 2011, 02:31:44 PM
I know this is an obvious question, but is it possible for you to see another therapist?

I'm not sure, I dont know if there are any other therapists that deal with transsexuals in the country, I would have to look into that,

Hi Kitoro
Iceland isn't part of EU so you can't use the Human Rights to get treatment.
With 320,000 people Iceland should have anything between 20 and 60 transsexuals so they must have access to therapists so you better ask the countries Health Dept for list of therapists.

QuoteI am already out to everyone, using my male name full time and everyone around me is trying their best to remember to use correct pronounces.

This doesn't count as RLE?

Um, I really hope there are more therapists.
That would suck if they are telling you that you have to try to live as a guy when you're mot even sure you can pass how you are - I never understood that; wouldn't trying to live as a guy pre-hormones be really dysphoria inducing to some people if all they wanted to do was take hormones, because they hated the way their body looked?

I dunno. It sure would've driven me in insane.

I think you need to be clear and maybe try and bluff him into writing the letter by telling him you are prepared to self medicate but would prefer supervised HRT. There is no requirement for HRT or gender therapy before starting HRT under Soc 7. All you need is to be cleared of any other possible diagnosis that could becausing your gender dysphoria. Put him on the spot and ask him to point his position out to you in the standard of care. Don't be shy about this it is your life and you have a right to live it as you see fit.

Huggs

Emily

Excellent news! everyone that replied thank you so much for your input,

I just had my session today, and things are looking fantastic, I was more clear on my history this time and I am expecting to start T soon in the new year, I am soo excited, I guess he didnt quite get my history the first time around.

Thanks everyone for replying to my post, but I think I dont have a problem with this anymore I am starting T soon on the new year!  I will update when I know more :D:D:D

Glad to hear its sorted out.
we all have times when nothing seems to go right.

Congratulations Mark!

Yay.

Congrats.