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Did/do you suffer with gender dysphoria ?

Started by Anatta, December 09, 2011, 11:17:58 PM

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Did/do you suffer with gender dysphoria ?

For The Pre-Transitioner = Yes extremely so...
9 (22.5%)
FTPT = Yes but I can handle it most of the time...
11 (27.5%)
FTPT = Not really at times maybe...
1 (2.5%)
FTPT = No but I still want to transition...
1 (2.5%)
The Transitioner  =Yes extremely so...
1 (2.5%)
TT = Yes but I can handle it most of the time...
11 (27.5%)
TT = Not really but I have my moments...
0 (0%)
TT = No so far so good...
0 (0%)
The Post Transitioner = Yes more often than not...
1 (2.5%)
TPT = Yes every now and again...
1 (2.5%)
TPT =No not really  I have my moments but they are few and far between...
3 (7.5%)
TPT = No... on the dysphoria front, life is sweet, no problems whatsoever...
1 (2.5%)

Total Members Voted: 36

Anatta

Kia Ora,

::) Because I had suffered from dysphoria because of my congenital condition, I'm some what intrigued by those members who claim to have 'never' suffered any discomfort...

::) I'm fully aware of the "Different strokes for different folks" thing, but it still deeply intrigues me...So hence this post/thread...

::) BTW The poll is for where one is at 'NOW' and is in three sections, the top/first is for pre transitioners the middle those who are in transition[that is have just started to live 'full time' 24/7/365, name change, with or without HRT etc] and last but not lease post transitioners-no explanation needed apart from the usual 'with or without surgery'....

::) So are you one of the chosen few who remain/ed dysphoria free ? Or do you suffer some or extreme discomfort ? * Or are you past all that ?

Metta Zenda :)
"The most essential method which includes all other methods is beholding the mind. The mind is the root from which all things grow. If you can understand the mind, everything else is included !"   :icon_yes:
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AbraCadabra

I suffered badly during transition, full time RLE/pre-op, but it hit me in bouts, what I then called GID attacks. It was horrible when it came down on me.

Post-op it just went away - and I hope it will just stay this way, though some might say I'm on my post-op honeymoon at present...

Yet, pre-transition, pre-epiphany before the whole house of cards came down in one fell swoop, I had 'issues' but was too much in denial about being trans.
Hell I could not even acknowledge there was such a thing. Yet, I always seemed to know I was a girl inside - just too stupid and unknowing to put 1 and 1 together.

Just a slow developer, eh
Axélle
Some say: "Free sex ruins everything..."
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Anatta

Quote from: Axélle on December 09, 2011, 11:38:18 PM
I suffered badly during transition, full time RLE/pre-op, but it hit me in bouts, what I then called GID attacks. It was horrible when it came down on me.

Post-op it just went away - and I hope it will just stay this way, though some might say I'm on my post-op honeymoon at present...

Yet, pre-transition, pre-epiphany before the whole house of cards came down in one fell swoop, I had 'issues' but was too much in denial about being trans.
Hell I could not even acknowledge there was such a thing. Yet, I always seemed to know I was a girl inside - just too stupid and unknowing to put 1 and 1 together.

Just a slow developer, eh
Axélle

Kia Ora Axelle,

::) From what I gather for some post oppers the euphoric bubble might all of a sudden burst and this can be quite an unpleasant experience for some , however if one is lucky, it will go down like a slow puncture, giving one time to adjust...

::) So have your puncture kit at the ready...Just in case  ;)

Metta Zenda :)
"The most essential method which includes all other methods is beholding the mind. The mind is the root from which all things grow. If you can understand the mind, everything else is included !"   :icon_yes:
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~RoadToTrista~

PT and yes but I can handle it most of the time. It's gradually worsening, and some days are better than others.

People who say they don't have dysphoria make me feel insecure. Perhaps we're all just crazy?
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Emily Ray

I didn't feel mfirst bout of body dysphoria until I was 6 months full-time. I think it started when men first started to really flirt with me. I really wanted to act on flirtation, but my obvious male parts stood in the way. It lasted for about 6 months and then it got better just as quickly as it came, without any apparent reason. That is the scary part, I don't know when or if it is ever going to poke its ugly head again into my life. In someways it is a ticking timebomb waiting to go off

Huggs

Emily
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Anatta

Quote from: ~RoadToTrista~ on December 09, 2011, 11:55:25 PM
PT and yes but I can handle it most of the time. It's gradually worsening, and some days are better than others.

People who say they don't have dysphoria make me feel insecure. Perhaps we're all just crazy?

Kia Ora Road,

::) Here have a +1...Things will change in time[including how you feel about yourself right now], I can guarantee they will...

Metta Zenda :)
"The most essential method which includes all other methods is beholding the mind. The mind is the root from which all things grow. If you can understand the mind, everything else is included !"   :icon_yes:
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Anatta

Quote from: Emily Ray on December 09, 2011, 11:59:20 PM
I didn't feel mfirst bout of body dysphoria until I was 6 months full-time. I think it started when men first started to really flirt with me. I really wanted to act on flirtation, but my obvious male parts stood in the way. It lasted for about 6 months and then it got better just as quickly as it came, without any apparent reason. That is the scary part, I don't know when or if it is ever going to poke its ugly head again into my life. In someways it is a ticking timebomb waiting to go off

Huggs

Emily

Kia Ora Emily,

::) Is this more so 'genital' dysphoria ? If so, will surgery fix it ? Or is there more to it than just your private parts ? * However you do seem to be coping well....

Metta Zenda :)
"The most essential method which includes all other methods is beholding the mind. The mind is the root from which all things grow. If you can understand the mind, everything else is included !"   :icon_yes:
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Padma

I'm almost 3 months into HRT, and I'm living full-time, out to pretty much everyone as someone who's transitioning.

Until recently, I didn't consider myself to be experiencing dysphoria, but I was choosing to interpret my experience in a different way. Looking back, what I was experiencing earlier was an emotional dysphoria - a strong feeling of homesickness for my female form. And now, since fairly recently, I'm experiencing quite a lot of more physical dysphoria - it just feels increasingly *wrong* to be in the body I'm in, with the shape I have, and the genitalia I have, and I'm more and more impatient to have the surgery and be myself again. I'm not sure why I say "again", but the closest I can get to explaining it is to say I feel like somewhere between conception and birth I was female and then something went wrong, something got taken from me. It's not a certainty, it's a strong feeling.

And now, when I'm with my girlfriend, a part of me feels like I can't be fully with her until my body's sorted out. We have to make do with this weird equipment I'm sporting :(.

So to begin with, I was all rational about this, but now the gut feeling of being in the wrong body is shouting louder and louder, and i can't tidy it away. And I'm glad, though it's uncomfortable - because it's real.
Womandrogyne™
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AbraCadabra

Quote from: Zenda on December 09, 2011, 11:48:05 PM
Kia Ora Axelle,

::) From what I gather for some post oppers the euphoric bubble might all of a sudden burst and this can be quite an unpleasant experience for some , however if one is lucky, it will go down like a slow puncture, giving one time to adjust...

::) So have your puncture kit at the ready...Just in case  ;)

Metta Zenda :)

Zenda,
maybe just an explanation on "euphoric bubble".
The only such bubble I had early on when I went on HRT, a sort of cloud nine feeling it was when I had no GID episodes.

Post-op there was NO euphoric bubble at all, just no more GID episodes.
I felt 'level' going into the SRS op and felt just as 'level' coming out of it as if nothing really had happened - just a nasty crocodile bite to mend :-)

Now I just have a very grounded secure inner feeling, since that 'dangle' stuff does not keep reminding me anymore of my 'mixed-up' condition.
I'm feeling very normal for the first time in my life, is how I can put it, a good feeling ,but not at all euphoric. --- Maybe after my first big O, if ever there be one? :-)

Axélle

Some say: "Free sex ruins everything..."
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Vee

With me it's mostly tolerable, but I'm kind of stoic
Most of the time it's like getting multiple error messages. Like you have installed a certain model hardware, but your drivers are for another - It works OK, but it constantly gives you error messages, both for functions that should, but are not happening, and for some that are happening but are dumbed down.
There are "waves" when it's stronger, and times when it stays calmer, but it's always there, and when it hits it's like the feeling from a high screeching noise.

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Mahsa Tezani

My jawline annoys me at times. But otherwise, I am fine...I am petite, have big cute feminine eyes/nose... HRT is comin along nicely.

I was considered a "pretty" boy before LOL
I actually miss the male role and act like the tough little femmie guy.
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Amazon D

as i start yr 14 = TPT i transitioned past gender to the spirit that lies below the surface..

Thank God for that.

I am no longer concerned about the exterior

I am more than just a shell / body

My spirit will live for infinity with those who have moved past the superficial

When i shed this outer shell physically i will still be here and i won't miss my time here on earth because

life here on earth is but a dream of the true spiritual world from whence we came to where we will return
I'm an Amazon womyn + very butch + respecting MWMF since 1999 unless invited. + I AM A HIPPIE

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El

Ugh i frikkin hate dysphoria, i get it all the time :(. Having a shower or getting changed kills my soul because it shows me all the masculine features i try to hide everyday. I hate my big feet, my tiny hips, my wide shoulders and most of my face (side fringe helps with the face no end though). being full-time has helped a lot but its still unbearable sometimes.

And then theres sex, now im 22 years old. From the ages of about 14-19 i experimented quite a lot sexually, I had relationships and one nighters with men and women but literally every experience was horrible because of my "downstairs mixup". Ive realized i can not have enjoyable sex untill ive had HRT and GRS and that is depressing.
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Anatta

Kia Ora,

::) Words can at times get a little confusing...

::) Gender Identity = http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gender_identity

::) Gender Identity Disorder = http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gender_identity_disorder

::) Gender Dysphoria = http://www.nhs.uk/conditions/gender-dysphoria/Pages/Introduction.aspx

::) Disorder = http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Disorder

::) Dysphoria = http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dysphoria

::) Just some little pointers for the newbees...........

Metta Zenda :)
"The most essential method which includes all other methods is beholding the mind. The mind is the root from which all things grow. If you can understand the mind, everything else is included !"   :icon_yes:
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Colleen Ireland

Quote from: Axélle on December 09, 2011, 11:38:18 PMYet, pre-transition, pre-epiphany before the whole house of cards came down in one fell swoop, I had 'issues' but was too much in denial about being trans.
Hell I could not even acknowledge there was such a thing. Yet, I always seemed to know I was a girl inside - just too stupid and unknowing to put 1 and 1 together.

Just a slow developer, eh
Axélle

AMEN, Sister!  Wow, that's the freaky thinkg about this journey, there are SO many others around who sound like they've been in my head.  SO many similarities.

My worst days are electrolysis days, when I haven't shaved in 2 days.  My facial hair is a HUGE trigger for me.  I'm currently going every week, so this is a weekly occurance.  I just have to keep reminding myself of the goal, and it really helps to read posts like Axelle's...  :)

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pidgeontoed

I'm a similar case so far Axelle, though I'm a freshie. I've always had extreme dysphoria until recently, when I realized exactly what caused it and stopped being in denial. I guess you could say right now I'm at the "epiphany honeymoon"? I'm happy to finally know and acknowledge who I am, but I am just waiting for it all to sink in as I begin to sort out my feelings. Instead of the hole that was there, it feels more like a warm comforting water balloon I guess, just waiting to get pricked by the pin of my thoughts... It's winter now and it gets cold when you're outside and soaked, metaphorically speaking.
"Playing things too safe is a popular way to fail... dying is another way."
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