As some people begin to see me as female. I wondered what it is that they see that make them say, ma'am, or are you the mother? what was the first thing that gave them that impression. One thing that I found was as the hormones work in me somethings about me have changed although they are small they can be seen. I wrote in a post about waking up in the morning looking in the mirror and seeing mostly male things about me but as the day went on and night came I look more female in the mirror. The strangest thing is I realized that it was the morning light coming through the window reflecting off my face revealing masculine things. When the sun went down the over head light was reflecting off my newly female attributes and shadowing masculine features.

My cloths,voice and the light working together to create an image for others to see.

What have you thought about?

Quote from: jainie marlena on December 18, 2011, 03:41:27 AM
As some people begin to see me as female. I wondered what it is that they see that make them say, ma'am, or are you the mother?
What have you thought about?

I saw a female when I stopped hormones. I saw what I think everyone else sees... More so than on hormones. But I look at my boy pics every day to remember where this person in the mirror came from.

Are they usually women who say that? Women are more perceptive/polite when it comes to transwomen or as my Mom used to say, "They just aren't paying attention". Women are much accepting and can't usually "tell"... To some of them, a barely feminine man = pretty girl.

Men on the other hand tend to be a bit more upfront.

But of course, everyone is different....and I don't think people pay super close attention to anyone. Men are guided by hormones...so things are much different in their perceptions. Unless they are ->-bleeped-<-s.

believe it or not both cases of Ma'am and are you the mother? were men. What I am saying is what do people look at? I have shaped up my eyebrows. I have to say it helped a lot from the front view. What do we see that make us think male or female?

I'll wager that few people could say what, exactly, they're looking at in deciding gender.

I'll guess that a fair part of it is seeing what they expect.  If they expect 'woman', for whatever reason, they'll see that.  And if they expect 'man', they'll see that.  In terms of things you might do, I'll guess the eyebrows were a good idea.  Namely, something to make it easy for others to continue with the expectation of 'woman'.  And, from greater distance, some stereotypically woman clothes might help telegraph the idea.

I saw plenty of transwomen at the Charlie's Dickens Fair today. I'd be like how i am at work, and not say any gender pronouns.

 I have been receiving a lot of masculine pronouns recently; he, him, his, and even a SIR!!!!!!!!!!

I would like to add something to this thread.

I agree with Padma's quote "More hair, less beard."

I also want to add to what she said. "More breast, less shoulder."

What do you think about that?

Because, perception is everything. Each of us has a different means and definition of it.

I think that many people will say ma'am if you're presenting as a woman out of respect. Not everyone is a jerk. But some genuinely view just that, a woman, while others can tell because they have a "good eye".

It's so weird. Like one time I went to this straight nightclub and everyone was clocking me from left to right. Then I went to this other straight nightclub and there was a band playing. The main singer, who was male, kept talking about the girl in the red dress, which was me, lol. I was dancing right in front of them and he kept eyeing me and giving me compliments through the microphone. On top of that, every time I would finish dancing with someone, another guy would come up to me and ask me to dance.

The last guy I danced with bought me a drink and then escorted me to my car after the night was over. All this time he had no clue I was trans. So weird but it was such an amazing night.

Quote from: ~~♥BeeBeeLyss♥~~ on December 19, 2011, 06:04:38 AM
I have been receiving a lot of masculine pronouns recently; he, him, his, and even a SIR!!!!!!!!!!

I would like to add something to this thread.

I agree with Padma's quote "More hair, less beard."

What do you think about that?

Removing the hair won't do crap... You still have the features and your style is far from feminine.

Just because you asked....

Honestly, I think they're right with the pronouns at this moment. You have a long way to go and are basically in the 'awkward" state. You still have a "boyish" presentation.