Personally, I think transitioning on the job has to be one of the worst things you can ever experience. Especially if you are the first the company has ever had. I cant get co-workers to address me by my 1st name, or even the right gender. And everything you say or do is scrutinized and/or twisted to make you a horrible person.  I think my new year's resolution is not to take their bull crap anymore. I'm trying to get all my ducks in a row so I can find another job and start out as myself. I'm just tired of all the ignorance and religious ass hats and their lack of respect for another person's feelings! GRRR

If that had happened to me... woaa, I would have raised so much hell >< Called meetings with HR and management and all sorts of people to "discuss the issue"... (of course, before the meeting, they would have all recieved a very long letter lecturing them on the obvious hypocrisy of the sittuation).

That is just how I handle things If they want to "play business professional" to hide their discrimination... ohhh, I am more than willing to play too

Of course, that is if where you live has legal protection for trans people (like in california)... without legal protection, you pretty much can A) make noise and get fired B) Leave C) keep quiet and just take the abuse.

it's in the parent company's Non-discrimination policy that gender identity and expression are protected but it isnt in the state of Indiana.

My little personal opinion in this diverse population of a country is screw your company! You have a basic 1st ammendment right to talk about what you want to who you want how you want. And people have the right not to listen to what you say, so talk about your transition all you want!

I was asked to have my daughter not talk about my transition at her school. It made me feel bad. I don't like that some people act like transition should be a shameful secret.

As a parent too, I can tell you that that won't happen. If your child is proud of your accomplishments, they will talk about it. I don't think your daughter is ashamed at all and is quite proud of your transition. She's probably noticed you to be happier and less stressed. And so much more loveable because you have this huge weight off your shoulders.

Quote from: Keaira on December 25, 2011, 03:46:14 AM
As a parent too, I can tell you that that won't happen. If your child is proud of your accomplishments, they will talk about it. I don't think your daughter is ashamed at all and is quite proud of your transition. She's probably noticed you to be happier and less stressed. And so much more loveable because you have this huge weight off your shoulders.

Yep yep, so much. She's perceptive and I am so much happier, and our household is so much more playful and laid back. She is proud. Thank you Keaira.

Quote from: Felix on December 25, 2011, 03:55:13 AM
Yep yep, so much. She's perceptive and I am so much happier, and our household is so much more playful and laid back. She is proud. Thank you Keaira.

You're very welcome Felix ^_^
I would also tell the school that if they find it uncomfortable that a student is exercising her right to freedom of speech then they may as well ban discussing interests, parents jobs and any sporting event a student might have or attend because that is your daughter expressing her pride in her family and what kind of people are in it.  And I would tell them that I am as equally proud of my child for doing it.

I just work at work. Unless they ask, then I'll stop to talk about it. I can't imagine someone not being able to talk about their other medical problems if asked.

The funny thing is everyone talks about their problems that they are going through at work just a few days after this the same person had the nerve to talk to me about is uncle's "sergery" and the "help he was getting." I will sit back and take it for now but I usually explode when the time comes. I have made my point known just not in a way that is verbal. If you read my other post I am making tee shirts that reflect me in this middle gender state of being. I just finished modifying my blue jean jacket and it is ready to go. someone told me at the bar new years that I need to sale it online. Hum maybe future income for transition.

It's a sign of the times sweetie.  I agree with those who have said it is unprofessional for you to discuss your personal business at work.  Friend the person and exchange emails and share that way AFTER WORK HOURS.

Also it's not just about transgender issues.  People are often unaware of how their voices carry.  It's a major complaint about people discussing personal issues at work.  It also opens the company up to liability issues.  Your situation is interesting and the type of thing that people would probably gossip about.  And so it could quickly turn into a hostile work environment that sets the company up for a law suit.


Consider this scenario  The "Offended Party"   goes to the boss and says "that Freak is out there talking about all this crap and I think it's disgusting, it's against the bible and I feel like it's being jammed down my throat."


If you were the boss what would you dol?   First of all the person is crossing major boundaries, you realize that if he or she is feeling this way he might say something to someone else who may then complain that it's hate speech.  I would for example. 

So the easiest thing is to ask you not to talk about it.   Then he's also documented an action.  Technically he can say that you are not working when you are talking about your "issue"

Pick your battles. 

Quote from: jainie marlena on January 03, 2012, 01:08:28 AM
The funny thing is everyone talks about their problems that they are going through at work just a few days after this the same person had the nerve to talk to me about is uncle's "sergery" and the "help he was getting." I will sit back and take it for now but I usually explode when the time comes. I have made my point known just not in a way that is verbal. If you read my other post I am making tee shirts that reflect me in this middle gender state of being. I just finished modifying my blue jean jacket and it is ready to go. someone told me at the bar new years that I need to sale it online. Hum maybe future income for transition.

The uncle's surgery isn't a hot button topic though. Trans and gay issues don't have a place in the workplace. It's unfortunate people get offended...But it's how it is.

Quote from: jainie marlena on January 03, 2012, 01:08:28 AM
The funny thing is everyone talks about their problems that they are going through at work just a few days after this the same person had the nerve to talk to me about is uncle's "sergery" and the "help he was getting." I will sit back and take it for now but I usually explode when the time comes. I have made my point known just not in a way that is verbal. If you read my other post I am making tee shirts that reflect me in this middle gender state of being. I just finished modifying my blue jean jacket and it is ready to go. someone told me at the bar new years that I need to sale it online. Hum maybe future income for transition.

Be calm quite and lady like and DON'T GET FIRED  you have a whole house full of children

@mixie it is well documented that I am the best worker every month I sign my name on a paper that my supervisor shows me. I don't talk at all when I work. I am also on the seal team to find ways to make our company a better place to work. as far as bible goes I classify my self as a eunuch which is biblical the only person there that claims to be a Christian knows this.

@disco I stopped talking about it. I just think it is crap.

@amazon D I'm not going to do anything to get fired. I like the work that I do just I am feeling really lonely at this point. I'm just having mixed feelings and am feeling sorry for myself. lol. I'm getting over it.

I guess I didn't explain myself clearly.   I'm not saying that you'll get fired.  I'm saying you could sue the company for a hostile work environment because of the things people are saying about you.  Legally the company could be faced with thousands of dollars in a lawsuit which you would likely win.  So I think this might be why the boss is asking you not to discuss it.  This is a legal way of him shutting down the gossip that could happen about you.  Most companies of statements about gossip in their employee policies.   Matthew 19:21 is the passage. Cheers.

@ mixie The one thing I find about gossip whether good or bad is people become aware of things through it. I see your point about a lawsuit.

Hey love the new pic jainie

but    next time 

Girl alone is my look. smiling is something I do when others are looking. I guess I was not thinking about that part when I was taking the picture. lol. My grandma said one time. "I am not a happy go lucky person. I don't have to smile all the time so stop asking me to."

happiness show in many ways. My hair is washed. lol.

Quote from: jainie marlena on January 07, 2012, 03:11:14 AM
Girl alone is my look. smiling is something I do when others are looking. I guess I was not thinking about that part when I was taking the picture. lol. My grandma said one time. "I am not a happy go lucky person. I don't have to smile all the time so stop asking me to."

happiness show in many ways. My hair is washed. lol.

I smile more often when no one is looking. That's when I don't have to come up with explanations for why I'm happy. Reasons, pfft.

Keeping you free from harassment does not take away their responsibility to protect others who also may feel harassed - hence the ruling.

As for whether or not working with men or women or both is better... Working with people who show up, shut up and do the job is the best.