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I got SIRed! Ouch!

Started by Jen-Jen, December 25, 2011, 06:48:44 PM

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Jen-Jen

So my wife and I went out to a late dinner at like 2am on Christmas day. We drove two hours out of town to the nearest Denny's. We wanted to spend some alone time together. Anyways so we get to the Denny's and I have to make a pit stop in the ladies room. so I walk in the restroom and the hostess is in there she says Hi as she walked out and I walked in. Anyways I headed out to the table my wife was at, she had already ordered her drink and advised me the waiter would be back to take my order. So the waiter walks up and says "what will you be having SIR?" my wife replied she'll have a hot chocolate. He walked off with no apology or nothing! I was dressed completely femme with make up and earrings on, painted nails, I thought I passed very well. Anyways it was my first time being called SIR when I'm out as me. Ouch did it hurt and make me feel horrible! I almost broke down and cried right there! My wife and I both looked at each other and said" How rude!" We both got up and left, My wife wanted to Punch him!As we were getting in our car we noticed the waiter getting to our table with my hot chocolate. He then ran out to find us as if we had skipped out on an expensive tab! We drove to the next nearest Denny's, my wife was trying to comfort me the whole way. Anyways we arrived at the next Denny's we sat down and our waitress came up and said "Hi girls! what will you be having" sigh! what a relief and feeling it was to be addressed correctly, she addressed me correctly the whole night and made me feel great! even a" you girls come back soon! "yay!
Don't judge a book by its cover! My lifes been like a country song! True love, amazing grace, severe heartbreak, buckles, boots n spurs! I 've been thrown off the bull a couple times, I keep getting up and dusting myself off! Can't give up on my happily ever after!
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drvotion86

That does suck when that happens =( I'm glad your day ended well though. i got sir'd on friday
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BrokenCode

Quote from: JennyCop on December 25, 2011, 06:48:44 PM
So my wife and I went out to a late dinner at like 2am on Christmas day. We drove two hours out of town to the nearest Denny's. We wanted to spend some alone time together. Anyways so we get to the Denny's and I have to make a pit stop in the ladies room. so I walk in the restroom and the hostess is in there she says Hi as she walked out and I walked in. Anyways I headed out to the table my wife was at, she had already ordered her drink and advised me the waiter would be back to take my order. So the waiter walks up and says "what will you be having SIR?" my wife replied she'll have a hot chocolate. He walked off with no apology or nothing! I was dressed completely femme with make up and earrings on, painted nails, I thought I passed very well. Anyways it was my first time being called SIR when I'm out as me. Ouch did it hurt and make me feel horrible! I almost broke down and cried right there! My wife and I both looked at each other and said" How rude!" We both got up and left, My wife wanted to Punch him!As we were getting in our car we noticed the waiter getting to our table with my hot chocolate. He then ran out to find us as if we had skipped out on an expensive tab! We drove to the next nearest Denny's, my wife was trying to comfort me the whole way. Anyways we arrived at the next Denny's we sat down and our waitress came up and said "Hi girls! what will you be having" sigh! what a relief and feeling it was to be addressed correctly, she addressed me correctly the whole night and made me feel great! even a you girls come back soon! yay!

Something like that always crushes a girl. And the worst is, its hard to shake it off after that. That truly stinks though. :(
Hugs
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fionabell

I don't understand why some people are so nasty about this. :(
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Alainaluvsu

To dream of the person you would like to be is to waste the person you are.



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Jen-Jen

yup yup! our second waitress got tipped really well!
Don't judge a book by its cover! My lifes been like a country song! True love, amazing grace, severe heartbreak, buckles, boots n spurs! I 've been thrown off the bull a couple times, I keep getting up and dusting myself off! Can't give up on my happily ever after!
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Torn1990

I am happy that ended for you and I am happy your wife is so supportive : ) how wonderful.
queer, transgender woman, Feminist, & writer. ~
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Jen-Jen

it was all here idea actually, she came home on her lunch break and told me to be all dolled up for her and ready to go out to dinner.
Don't judge a book by its cover! My lifes been like a country song! True love, amazing grace, severe heartbreak, buckles, boots n spurs! I 've been thrown off the bull a couple times, I keep getting up and dusting myself off! Can't give up on my happily ever after!
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MsDazzler

Once again, this makes me wonder if my deafness is a curse or blessing as in terms of transitioning - I never know if someone is calling me sir or madam, lol.

Ignorance is bliss, RIGHT?  ::)
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Annah

my ex gf enjoys being deaf from time to time.

She said it was "Goddess' way to block out all the verbal bull->-bleeped-<-."

I hate the word "ex" as we're still very close.
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tekla

In a lot of cases you get what you pay for.  And places like Denny's can be hit and miss.  However, I did the circut of some of the Vegas fancy bars and clubs (Caesar's, the Mirage, the Bellagio, Planet Hollywood and Paris), and I don't pass with blind people at my best, and w/o a wig, so I'm sure even less, and never a 'sir' to be had.  Like I said I think you get what you pay for.
FIGHT APATHY!, or don't...
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Cindy

I'm not sure what a Denny's is I presume some sort of chain thingy? I'm in Australia so I'm not all hat up with the USA chains, but I do know that Americans like to eat out a lot at such places and that the staff live on the tips, so I'm surprised that staff would be so stupid. It is very rare to tip in Australian restaurants, I cannot remember the last time I tipped anyone in Australia. But if anyone was that rude to me I would have management over and they would be looking for a new job ASAP. I may accept a grovelling apology and a free meal, reluctantly of course.

I'm glad you both had a nice dinner finally.

Cindy

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fionabell

After seeing Jennycop on youtube I'm surprised that the guy could tell she was trans anyway. I probably wouldn't have guessed she wasn't a cis
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Jen-Jen

@ Cindy, Dennys is a  Family Diner chain  open 24hrs really convienient. I didn't want to cause a scene though,so we just left. But it was just so rude, I mean come on you see this person wearing all femme stuff really trying, you could at least be nice and acknoledge it, even if its just for a tip.

@ Fionabell, Thank you so so much!
Don't judge a book by its cover! My lifes been like a country song! True love, amazing grace, severe heartbreak, buckles, boots n spurs! I 've been thrown off the bull a couple times, I keep getting up and dusting myself off! Can't give up on my happily ever after!
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fionabell

He was probably some kind of ->-bleeped-<- ->-bleeped-<- and therefore(I know"therefore ":laugh:) attuned to such things.
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Jen-Jen

but if he was a ->-bleeped-<- why would he say sir?
Don't judge a book by its cover! My lifes been like a country song! True love, amazing grace, severe heartbreak, buckles, boots n spurs! I 've been thrown off the bull a couple times, I keep getting up and dusting myself off! Can't give up on my happily ever after!
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fionabell

Quote from: JennyCop on December 26, 2011, 03:10:10 PM
but if he was a ->-bleeped-<- why would he say sir?
I meant in that way that homophobes  are sometimes gay.
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Guantanamera

I'm gonna jump in and play Devil's advocate if noone minds.

If your Denny's is anything like the Denny's/Ihop/Jb's by my casa, the vast majority of the workers are either blitzed or high out of their skulls (And have a tenous grasp on the English language.) Perhaps he just was really tired/strung-out and was calling everyone sir?

Having worked stressful serving jobs before like that, I can that attest that I would sometimes mix up the sir/ma'am thing unintentionally. Mostly towards Cis-gendered people. If you have to talk to 3-500 people a night, you're bound to mix up once or twice.

Although, he didn't really apoligize when you corrected him, so my guess was he was just being an ass.  ::)
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tekla

What's a big tip at Denny's?  A couple of bucks?  Three maybe if you order the big specials.  What do you expect for three bucks?
FIGHT APATHY!, or don't...
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monica93304

I've had worse service at Denny's as a male than as a female. Go figure. 
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