Quote from: Bishounen on January 05, 2012, 01:10:23 PM
People imagine to see a lot of things that aren't even there if being fired up enough.
Reminds me of the comment section to a musicvideo with the openly transsexual Hip Hop-artist Sydney Starr. She is post-op and anatomically female, and yet there were comments posted about how you "could clearly see her penis in the pants", or, that you could "Clearly hear on her voice that she is a man"(Which you so can't), and so on.
I also agree that it is easy to fool people into thinking that a Bio-female is really a trans- All that is basically needed is that someone pretends to put up a pic of a transgendered person and people will immediately see all kind of "obviously revealling" things.
That being said, it can sometimes also go the exact other way, that people are just too nice and tells a trans-person that very obviously is unpassable, that she/he looks 100% passable.
However, unless talking about dangerous situations, I really do not think it is of any greater importance whether someone fully passes or not, as long as the person is happy her or himself, and if someone truly do not pass, then that truth should only be revealled to the unpassable if he or she actually asks about it and wants advice, not otherwise.
I have a few female friends that are very unattractive. One is very heavy and has a thick neck, she also has a lot of unfortunate facial hair. She started dating in the black community because she felt she didn't stand a chance with white guys who judged a lot more by weight. She's got a sort of mean countenance because of this and she's been treated poorly. I feel bad for her.
But she's a cisgender. She would be shredded on here. There's a difference between saying "Do I pass as female" and "Do I look like an attractive female" I suppose many trans m t f look at women through rose colored glasses and see pretty women. But there are many unattractive women. They still look like women but they are not very pretty. So an unattractive m t f will still look 100 percent female to me but just not as feminine as some others.
I really do think it's important. I've suggested before that if a person is worried about passing, they might want to lower their standards a bit and look at women who reflect more of what they really look like rather than hold up impossible ideals.
For me for example I am an amazon. I've seen people post on here numerous times that if you are tall you won't pass. I've shared my experience at being "clocked" as a transwoman when I'm cisgender. It doesn't upset me the way it would upset a mtf. When it happened to me when I was younger I'd get a bit down in the dumps about it and go on the next day and be sure to gussy up and put on make up. I mean I can hardly blame someone if I'm walking around with a shaved head and no make up. Etc. So I don't take it to heart.
The difference it seems is that when a transwoman gets clocked they immediately dive into thinking they aren't passing instead of realizing that cisgender women are often clocked as well. Cisgender women can have deep voices, cisgender women can have strong jaws or even look like they have an adams apple when they don't. Look at Ann Coulter. They can be brawny and big.
You can't let someone else's opinion that you don't pass get you down. And if you keep getting clocked that's one thing. But if it's a once in a while thing, it happens to cisgender women as well if they have some masculine features.
I will never be a petite skinny girl like Jessica Alba. I can sit around and be miserable or get on with it. When you get on with it and love who you are you set the standard for how others treat you as well.
