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Do You Feel That Being Trans Has "Aged" You In A Sense?

Started by King Malachite, January 12, 2012, 01:03:17 AM

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King Malachite

It can be physically, emotionally, spiritual, mentally, etc. you name it.

Feel the need to ask me something or just want to check out my blog?  Then click below:

http://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,135882.0.html


"Sometimes you have to go through outer hell to get to inner heaven."

"Anomalies can make the best revolutionaries."
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Maegan

Physically? Mmmm.......younger!! ;D
Emotionally definitely more mature.
Spiritually, well, no real changes.
Mentally? At times as confused as hell!!! :-\  At times moody but mostly happy. At times like a time bomb waiting for a fuse.
I really think the most difficult aspect of being trans must be the ability to suppress your own impatience. (Why are these boobs taking so long to develop????)

Of all the ups and downs of being trans, I still wouldn't trade it for anything else.
Life is a journey, get in, sit down, shut up and hold on! You are in for a hell of a ride! Enjoy!  :laugh:

Huggs

Maegan


Sometimes you find yourself in the middle of nowhere, and sometimes in the middle of nowhere, you find yourself.
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Butterflyhugs

It's interesting that you brought this up, because I literally had a conversation about this exact topic with my friend tonight over dinner.

A little info about me: I'm 22, and just restarted college as a freshman. Between pre-transition depression, during-transition awkwardness, and post-transition family fallout, I never got around to finishing my education/pursuing my professional goals. (I had kept my transition a secret from everyone in my family, except my mom, up until 3 days before I got FFS.)

I absolutely feel that my transition journey has "aged" me at least in terms of consciousness, and perhaps emotion too. The stress of transition for me (which was concentrated mostly in the 3rd phase I mentioned, the fallout) makes me feel years older than I actually am, based on "life experience" alone. Rape, homelessness, hunger, cold, alcoholism, attempted suicide, prostitution, etc--all in less than a single year. It takes a toll on you. Someone said to me over Christmas that I "lived" enough in one year to fill the entire lives of at least 3 average people. The rational part of me considers that hyperbole, but the part of me that still relives all those memories daily can see her point.

Add to that the fact that now my school peers and my friends, with whom I interact everyday, are all 18 and 19, and I feel ancient! Someone complains that the Internet reception on their iPhone4 isn't fast enough, and I almost want to give them the "walked uphill naked in the snow in my day" speech (which isn't even that far from the truth honestly).

The irony though, is that I now look several years younger than I was when I started transitioning. One of my clearer drunken moments from last year consisted of a concerned woman asking me "What are you 16 or something? And you've been out drinking like this???"
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Kreuzfidel

Mentally, yes.  Because I've suffered with gender dysphoria since kindergarten, I never felt that I belonged with other children since I was so obviously flawed.  I couldn't enjoy my childhood because I wasn't allowed to be a boy.  Since I was little I've always hung out with older people.  Even now, I feel so inadequate around people my age and younger it's almost a phobia to have to be around teens/young adults.  I feel that I went from a 5-year-old to a 35-year-old between kindy and second grade.
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King Malachite

@Magen I love your last quote.  I kind of needed that!

@Butterflyhugs  I wouldn't have known that you were 22 until you told me.  You look as though you would blend in with the 18 and 19 year olds. :)

@Kreuzfidel Thats how I exactly felt.  I just hung out by myself and started thinking about things (or think in extreme detail rather) you wouldn't expect younger child to think of in terms of sexuality and life.
Feel the need to ask me something or just want to check out my blog?  Then click below:

http://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,135882.0.html


"Sometimes you have to go through outer hell to get to inner heaven."

"Anomalies can make the best revolutionaries."
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