I know we have a gaming section, but it's tiny. I'm writing an article for a website and it centers on ->-bleeped-<- in gaming. So does anyone feel (like me) that games helped/help with being transgendered? I.e. for escape, the freedom to play as your actual gender, feeling free in an environment free from judgment, the fact that gaming culture is open-minded, etc.

Thanks!

For me, games were simply a place for me to hide away from the world..

I played an online game (WoW) for a few years as my correct gender - well, accidentally kind of, people assumed I was a girl, and I let them. It felt nice for a while, but I'm not sure if it was actually healthy for me. Would have been better if I'd come out rather than hid away inside a game.

I don't play them anymore. My ex was a big gamer and I originally met her through that game, and I don't really want to get sucked back into that world. I might play an offline game again someday, but I'll never do another one online.

I have no friends, so all I do is play video games... It definitely does help me. I already beat Saints Row: The Third, so now nearly half of my time playing that game is spent dressing up my character, changing her hair and makeup, etc. I love the freedom to choose my gender in games like that.

It helps to alleviate frustration and loneliness and, of course, feels great to play as your true gender.  Sometimes, for me, it compounds the loneliness - reminds me that I'm a loser with no friends

I have played second life for many years and still love it. It was a great place to explore gender and it's where I met my present partner. We have a long distance relationship but we stay close spending time together in second life. I suppose people could get too lost into worlds like this but it helped me.

I used to love WoW. I had male and female characters, and that was okay with everybody.

Quote from: Lyra Dash on January 16, 2012, 08:41:54 PM
I have no friends, so all I do is play video games... It definitely does help me. I already beat Saints Row: The Third, so now nearly half of my time playing that game is spent dressing up my character, changing her hair and makeup, etc. I love the freedom to choose my gender in games like that.

That's not good.  Why not seek out a glbt support group nearby?  Interact with real people face-to-face.

Does your school have a gay-straight alliance?  Have you tried clubbing?

Quote from: Jamie D on January 17, 2012, 01:24:24 AM
That's not good.  Why not seek out a glbt support group nearby?  Interact with real people face-to-face.

Does your school have a gay-straight alliance?  Have you tried clubbing?

I try to socialize, but I live right along the bible belt and nearly everyone hates me just because I wear pink shoes; they don't even know I'm transgender yet. The few tolerant people I've come across always have better friends already, so they just ignore me. I do have a few acquaintances to get me through the day, but by now I've decided that all I can do is wait for college.

Dungeons and Dragons Table dice with good friends. I'm always playing a female character.

To me games didn't really help at all.  Although you do a pick a gender for your character, ultimately I feel it was just me hiding from reality.

D&D in my youth (table top)... Although I didn't play female characters out of fear of the group I played with, the ability to imagine alternative lives was something that allowed me to explore various ideas, values, and play with different gendered aspects but usually just one aspect at a time so I didn't out myself and my general inability at the time to accept what I already knew. That being said, I honestly believe that without being able to explore other realities I probably wouldn't be here now. Needed an outlet that was imaginative, creative, social, etc. I did get more chances to play a plethora of female characters when I was DM because we are common in a market square or inn. Always when I felt most at home!

Quote from: grrl1nside on January 17, 2012, 08:14:41 PM
D&D in my youth (table top)... Although I didn't play female characters out of fear of the group I played with, the ability to imagine alternative lives was something that allowed me to explore various ideas, values, and play with different gendered aspects but usually just one aspect at a time so I didn't out myself and my general inability at the time to accept what I already knew. That being said, I honestly believe that without being able to explore other realities I probably wouldn't be here now. Needed an outlet that was imaginative, creative, social, etc. I did get more chances to play a plethora of female characters when I was DM because we are common in a market square or inn. Always when I felt most at home!

I want someone to teach me to play regular D&D. When I was growing up my brother and his friends played but they wouldn't let me because I was a little kid. I had a boyfriend recently who played but his friends wouldn't let me because I was a girl. When I was younger I played the video games and read the books, but I never made my way into any tabletop groups.

What a shame that they excluded you because usually the groups I've played with would have fallen over themselves if a female wanted to play... Played with a few female gamers later on and they always brought the social vibe to a new level. If you really do want to play then why not dig around to find a local game shop or two, have a chat (they may even have a board asking for players) with the owner and ask who might be willing to take in a new player or two. Most game shop owners are only too happy to help. Take a look at the Players handbook and maybe just try to create a character or two by yourself without playing just to get familiar with the basics. Way back when they used to have the odd old solo adventures that you could do all by yourself but they are from previous editions e.g. M1 Blizzard Pass, M2 Riddle of the Minotaur, must be a few others. Also, if you could just find one other person there was a "One on One Adventurers Compendium" for just one player and DM. Not that I would recommend this longterm, but if they only want people in with some basic experience then it is something that could get you the basics in case people are wanting to be gatekeepers. I used to like have new people join as long as they were only 1 or 2 over a period of time because it was really great energy and changed the dynamic. You might have to try a few groups over a bit of time until you find the right group but when you do there is nothing better. Makes me want to start up again... I'm waiting for my kids to get a bit older then I think it would be interesting to play as a family! Don't know of anyone doing that...

Quote from: Lyra Dash on January 16, 2012, 08:41:54 PM
I have no friends, so all I do is play video games... It definitely does help me. I already beat Saints Row: The Third, so now nearly half of my time playing that game is spent dressing up my character, changing her hair and makeup, etc. I love the freedom to choose my gender in games like that.

I want to get an ice cream and a soda with you. I'm kind of in the same boat. I do the same thing with my character on Saints Row: The Third into a character I see fit.  I did it more so on Saints Row 2.

I love video games for the escape and the freedom to be a person other than myself.  I actually did a lot of my college papers on video games.  Until I can get on my own to start T video games will have to be my therapy.  When I play video games I feel important and not small and helpless.  I hate it say it but if I'm not exactly being a hero in video gaming then I love taking my inner rage out on the civillians running them over, burning them, shooting them, beating them up. etc you get the point.  I wouldn't do those things in real life but for my personal situation where I still have to live as a female due to my family and being the Bible belt and having no money for general therapy I just have to due with what I can.  I just love video games.  It's a relatively cheap form of therapy and escape.

QuoteI'm waiting for my kids to get a bit older then I think it would be interesting to play as a family! Don't know of anyone doing that...

Wil Wheaton Takes His Son & Friends Through D&D Campaign
http://laughingsquid.com/wil-wheaton-takes-his-son-friends-through-dd-campaign/
yay

Thanks for the pointers, grrl1nside.

Quote from: Felix on January 17, 2012, 12:22:36 AM
I used to love WoW. I had male and female characters, and that was okay with everybody.

Heh.. I did the same thing.. but my main was female.

That said.. I've used wow and work as vehicles to hide from the world for years now.

I don't think video games have helped with my gender issues, but having freedom to play however I want was always refreshing. Now this may sound silly but the most 'helpful' game to me has been Pokemon. I've played it since it first came out and still enjoy the games. It's become monotonous but there is something about raising your team and nurturing them that makes me feel a little better.

I try to avoid playing too much of any game now though. It's so easy to get wrapped up in it because it sometimes acts as a form of therapy, but it doesn't really address the underlying issues.

I like some good escapism now and again. XD Actually, probably too much. But I don't think it really helps or did help. To each his own. I do play fewer games now than I used to, but I'd attribute that more to growing up than to transitioning.

To answer the question, no. What games allowed me to do was, as others have stated, evade reality and escape into a fantasy world. Yes, I could experience being my true gender, but ultimately games proved self-destructive for me; they only served to delay my transition by allowing me to be a woman without having to do all of the work of transitioning. Reality, as much as I may have wished it at the time, does not work that way.