I guess I've been feeling cynical about people lately, distrusting of others, and such, burned and continually disappointed by others.  It can be easy for me to blame others for their shortfalls.

However, its not in my nature to be cynical about others.  Being cynical itself IMO is a miserable existence, as I'm not really an introvert, I like to be with others. 

Perhaps then, I need to be more understanding.  I need to understand that culture largely influences people's thought processes and beliefs, that thus lead to actions.  I also have to understand human nature, as in that we ourselves have our own instincts, and our minds (and feelings) can resist us in terms of what we'd really like to do.  People also vary in terms of maturity.  People, especially in individualistic cultures, are largely responsible for their own selves, and in the United States, there is not that much in terms of a safety net, so people have to be extra responsible for their own selves.  Thus, they cannot give as much of their time or support as they would like to give, and they may not be able to be as thoughtful as they would like to be.  Also, in America, there's not much incentive to be honest given that individualism and capitalism don't reward honesty, and honesty in fact may be a hindrance (for instance, when trying to get a job.)  Plus, many people may not want to make others feel bad by being honest.

It thus also serves me well to not expect a lot from others, and just simply appreciate those who give more than would be minimally expected.

Hi Katelyn,
I think you do show some very good insight...

It's also a bit like being between the devil and the deep blue sea, as to being honest to who you are, even when not always feeling so friendly and civil, and trying to bend over backwards to accommodate every one and his/her uncle.

Political Correctness has LOADS to with it, and being 'punished' if you are not always falling in line with main-stream expectations - rules of engagement if you wish.

If you have to bend over backwards to often, without having 'absorbed/understood' the WHY of it all, it will absolutely lead to becoming cynical.

Being cynical is a way to protect your soft inner core - but as you say, it also leads to isolation of the self.

Loads of folks isolate themselves like that to simply fit in AND SURVIVE. The result is depression...

I do not have the perfect answer as to how to escape this cultural clinch, and in the process dealing with it myself I often win --- but then I sometimes am also shown the door. And that of course hurts, but is the unavoidable consequence of being who you are including the good and the bad which we all incorporate.

So yes, INSIGHT will help to be less cynical - plus to try an love your 'enemies' --- one tough call it can be at times, it also helps one to grow and learn to forgive.

Axélle

You have to take others for who they are. You may not understand them, you may not know what they are going through. The best thing is to wish them well.

There's much in society that can make us feel cynical ( and rightly so) but we should let others negativity, or shortedness stop us from being who we are. I agree that political correcteness (I define as not have the guts to call something for what it is) has caused some to shy away from any honest talk or have an honest opinion.

It does take courage to go against the grain, something that I'm doing more of. Everyone is entitled to their own feelings and ideas and should be respected for that.