I haven't posted for a while, I've been too unmotivated to do much more than get out of bed. But I need some encouragement.

I have a non-normative body. I'm taking steps to start low dose T in the upcoming months, but I don't want top surgery. At all. Sometimes I want a flat chest so bad it hurts and consumes all my energy, and at those times I'm glad I can bind. But often I don't really want to bind--I like my boobs more often than not. But I bind most days anyway because of social dysphoria and anxiety. I hate being constantly misgendered--I HATE having my body gendered at all. I've been trying to work on dealing with it, because binding has wrecked my back, shoulders, ribs and neck. But I'm scared to start T and feel even more pressure to constantly bind.

Are there any transguys on here who like their breasts? I'm feeling a little alone. How do you cope with social bull sh*t? For those of you who are on T, how do you stay safe but also comfortable in your body?

I dunno dude.

But speaking from personal experience breasts are pretty awesome. I don't think it's so weird to like having them.

I don't plan on having the moobs lobbed off but I hate having them too. Annoying things that get in the way. They don't even do anything for me in the "feel good" department. I get nothing out of them. Useless. But I'm personally anti-surgery so I just deal with it. The binder I have is a velcro one from Love Boat and it's not bad. No, it doesn't get me flat as a board, but normal dude chests are not that flat (unless the dude is rail skinny). I also don't have huge moobs like some of the guys on here. They're a B something or other. So the velcro binder makes me feel better but does not hurt my back, shoulders, ribs etc. If I have it on as tight as it will go, it does, so basically I just don't wear it that tight.

But, if you like 'em, why get rid of them? If they aren't huge, maybe you can try the velcro binder like I have (also helps to layer clothes) and you can adjust it so it doesn't cause you any pain?

Like Insideontheoutside, I don't like my moobs either. They're just annoying for me and they've gotten less and less appealing on any level now that I've got a hairy chest going on. I do indeed plan on top surgery, however, I'm worried that I'll never have the money, so I might just have to bind for life.

I don't think it's strange that you like having them. If they don't bother you, then that's a good thing, isn't it?

Unfortunately though, even if you don't see anything wrong in identifying as a boy and having boobs, I'm not gonna lie, the world will have a problem with it. People assume that all humans with boobs are women, "If it smells like it, looks like it, sounds like it, then it's gotta be a...." Sadly enough, chances are that if you keep the boobs and you don't bind or hide them, then you're going to constantly be addressed as a girl. You're not going to change the opinion of the whole world, not unless you become a pop-star, so instead, you're going to have to change the way that you think in order to be happy. Honestly, through the years, I've realized that I just have to stop giving a ->-bleeped-<- about what everyone else says or thinks about me in order to be happy, if I cared, I would have hung myself years ago.

I do however think it's strange that you're saying that binding has ruined your back and such. Do you mind me asking how exactly you bind and for how long you've been doing it? Perhaps you should try another method? Binding should never hurt and when it does, you need to find another way to do it and give your chest a break.

I never liked my boobs for more than sexual pleasure, I thought they looked good just didnt felt right on me, and had to much phobia with anyone touching them.

Only thing I miss is the sensation, as I said again sexually, but I will hopefully get some felling during the next 1-2 years in the future.
---
so dont really relate on this point.

on the other hand:

I do have it pretty simular with my lower part.
I do like to have a penis, but in some way I also like not having one, but in a third basic I also feel annoyed for the fear of anyong looking strange at me for not having a showable penis. its so confussing.

I do need to find a better binding method, I just haven't had a lot of money. Part of it is my body is falling apart in general...a lot of my muscles are uncomfortably tight, my joints have always been kinda bad, and I can't sleep in a way that doesn't make it worse in the morning. But when I get some more cash I'm gonna try another Les Love Boat binder (I bought one a few months ago, but it was just wrong for my body type). I need to lay down the cash for a hearing aid first...oyyy I'm falling apart

I realize I can't change people's boobs=woman construct  I think I'll just have to get used to mandatory binding after I start T. Or tune into that "I-don't-give-a-->-bleeped-<-" attitude GentlemanRDP mentioned. Kinda already there when I'm in an emotionally good place, but I'm worried about my safety after T. I realize people do it, I guess I just don't have any role models. All the older transguys I know (a luxury in itself) have had top surgery or are slowly scraping the money together to do so while constantly binding.

Quote from: Mika on February 06, 2012, 02:09:01 PM
All the older transguys I know (a luxury in itself) have had top surgery or are slowly scraping the money together to do so while constantly binding.

Unfortunately, most transguys I know are like this, even ones that identify themselves as "queer as ->-bleeped-<-" and all that. I think your situation might be an unusual one, but you should remember if this makes you happy it is what is most important. I personally cannot relate to your situation at all, but I wish you the best of luck, dude. I'm assuming as long as you plan to date and associate with mostly gender non-binary folks a situation like this is manageable.

I like my chest, and I've decided to keep it.

When I first started transitioning I had a very intense dysphoria about it, believing that I couldn't be a man with them and they weren't right. One of my friends frequently mentions the calls he got where I wanted to cut them off while we're teaching about our experiences. With time I accepted that I could be myself, a man, with them.

Plus the more I read about the surgeries the more I worried I'd lose nipple sensation. That is unacceptable since with my sex drive activated by T I need those for play!

I also had problems with binders at first. A torn chest lining had me at two ER's in a weekend and a host of people telling me to stop binding. After not binding to let it heal I compromised and bought small underarmor shirts. Properly sized I should wear mediums, but the smalls provide a decent bind without being to tight. Plus they're cheaper than binders. I will admit they don't make me flat, but even with just the underarmor (no t-shirt) I can pass as though I just have large pecs.

I'll also admit I don't fully identify as male. My gender is transgendered, female to male but my sex is gynandromorph, or someone with both male and female sex characteristics. My boobs are just a small part of my feminine sex. I just hide them so they don't interfere with my gender. If I could legally get away going shirtless and letting them flop I would. Since that would likely get me arrested/killed I deal with the clothes. I do try to take one day a week where I just were a baggy shirt and don't bind so they can breath.

Quote from: Mika on February 06, 2012, 02:09:01 PM
I do need to find a better binding method, I just haven't had a lot of money. Part of it is my body is falling apart in general...a lot of my muscles are uncomfortably tight, my joints have always been kinda bad, and I can't sleep in a way that doesn't make it worse in the morning. But when I get some more cash I'm gonna try another Les Love Boat binder (I bought one a few months ago, but it was just wrong for my body type). I need to lay down the cash for a hearing aid first...oyyy I'm falling apart

I realize I can't change people's boobs=woman construct  I think I'll just have to get used to mandatory binding after I start T. Or tune into that "I-don't-give-a-->-bleeped-<-" attitude GentlemanRDP mentioned. Kinda already there when I'm in an emotionally good place, but I'm worried about my safety after T. I realize people do it, I guess I just don't have any role models. All the older transguys I know (a luxury in itself) have had top surgery or are slowly scraping the money together to do so while constantly binding.

I feel your pain, I really wish the world wasnt so closeminded and simple.
if it helps I can say there are cis-guys who have boobs.

I havent seen many T guys without top surgery either, and who diffently dont want it,
I have seen one in some porn thing. he where on T but didnt had top or bottom surgery. I dont remember his name.
I think I saw the interviuew about him for the sexing a transman trailer but im not sure? but I will send a link if I find him.

I've spoken to a lot of non-op transguys, and I think it's just a given that everyone has a different personal view/circumstance related to surgery, whether that be top or bottom. Personally, I'm already saving for my surgery in hopes that I will be able to have it over and done with by this time next year if I can. I'm slowly saving, and I'm lucky to have the support from family/friends who are kind enough to try and help in any way they can.

Honestly, whatever you end up doing, it is your body, and you are the only person who decides how you identify. Whether that is contributed to by an aesthetic attribute(s) is entirely your business. I think for posture/comfort sake, a lot of transguys hate binding, but can't stand not doing it, particularly in public. I am unfortunately one of those people. I only ever feel comfortable without my binder around my girlfriend, and that's not even all of the time.