My girlfriend has been wit guys before and had boyfriends before but she has mostly identified as a lesbian, is attracted to girls, and still identifies as a lesbian. But altho she likes my body, shes maad cool wit the transition and all (has always known me as kaleb-male) and is totally in love wit me, not my body and always assures me of that. I do believe her...but...

Im not sure how i feel about her still identifying as a lesbian? Thoughts, opinion, advice? I mean its not a huge issue, I think its jus my pride or something...Jus irritating but not a big deal...Never really brought it up to her i dont think.

I've never dated lesbians.  My wife has always identified as a heterosexual cisfemale and has only been attracted to cismales before.  If this bothers you that your gf identifies as a lesbian still, talk to her about it.

My girlfriend has always dated males, but she identifies as pansexual I believe. - you definitely need to talk to her about it...

I understand how you feel, my girlfriend has commented before that she prefers women to men and even though I'm just a questioning dork, it still makes me a bit nervous about branching out. But yeah, she identifies more as Pansexual than anything. So talk to her about the discomfort it causes you? That's pretty much all you can do.

As long as she doesn't consider herself to be in a lesbian relationship I think it's OK, but her identity as lesbian is also inaccurate. If she has the ability to fall in love with men, trans or not, while considering them 100% male, she is bisexual by definition. A lesbian is attracted exclusively to women. I don't get why she identifies as something she is not.

my wife still identifies as a lesbian .... she loves me and I look at it as a small thing so I don't worry about it

My girlfriend identified solely as a lesbian before we began dating. She is still attracted to women but she is attracted to me on both a physical and emotional level. It's best to ask your girlfriend about it. I was worried about exactly the same sort of thing, but after sitting down and discussing it, we were on the same level. Just speak to her!

When my my ex girlfriend and I were together she strongly identified as bisexual.  After she broke up with me she identified as lesbian.  Like the others said discuss your concerns with her and let her know how you feel on the subject.

My ex stopped identifying as lesbian at some point because of her attraction to me...though I know she prefers women. As she puts it, cismales would never do it for her primarily because of their socialization. I've never asked her about dating another transguy...but yeah, it never bothered me because she NEVER gave me any indication that she saw me or desired me as female.

Bisexual but I know she see's me as male so I'm cool with it :-)
She couldn't tell I was trans and became attracted to me as cismale, then I told her and she's fine with that so that's cool. I've dated a gay guy before and straight girls and I do feel more comfortable with that but it's no different I guess.
I'd be lying if I said I would date a lesbian though, for my own confidence I just couldn't...

I don't date women, but I would not appreciate my boyfriend identifying as "straight".  In fact, I had one boyfriend that claimed to be bisexual...but then decided he was only straight in the middle of the relationship.  It completely fell apart because the dynamics changed.  Plus, if he claims to be straight (or in your case, if she claims to be lesbian), I feel as though that does not acknowledge your transition at all.  Kind of like, "it's cute that you THINK you're a boy, but I'll only see this relationship as two women."

We identified as lesbians before but then it was like "SURPRISE IM TRANS". Now she identifies as a bisexual but she says gender doesn't matter. She loves me for who I am. Regardless, we have lesbian books an that bothere me for a while but now it's like who cares? It takes time  and communication between the two of you to make things work! Best of luck!

Maybe she identifies as a lesbian but considers you her one dudely exception. Either way it's probably a good idea to talk to her about it.

Quote from: poptart on February 15, 2012, 05:11:56 PM
her identity as lesbian is also inaccurate. If she has the ability to fall in love with men, trans or not, while considering them 100% male, she is bisexual by definition. A lesbian is attracted exclusively to women. I don't get why she identifies as something she is not.

I think we should be careful about making judgements about the validity of other people's identities and whether or not they're "accurate."