Susan's Place Logo

News:

Visit our Discord server  and Wiki

Main Menu

That feeling when people compare you to genetic girls.

Started by Alyx., February 15, 2012, 08:37:56 PM

Previous topic - Next topic

0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic.

Keaira

Quote from: mixie on February 18, 2012, 01:09:49 AM
To the OP  you remember when I complimented your pix in another thread.  You are one of those "fairy faced girls" that I used to envy the crap out of when I was younger.  I actually changed my avatar so you can see I'm not completely adverse to make up.  This is a pix that a friend of mine forced me into make up and gussying up.

Envy of female delicacy is something I understand very well even as a cisgendered girl.  I can never ever wear heels because I am a hulking 5 11 girl.  I literally buy one pair of shoes for each season and wear them until they fall apart.  I envy envy envy so much those petite girls around 5 7 who seem to have miraculously been born with flat stomachs and thin body.

I have issues with an enlarged mons pubis.  I'm serious when I tell you that if you reached down the front of my pants my mons pubis is probably bigger than any penis you will ever find.  So I can't wear tight fitted skirts or pants that ride up because I have a camel toe that looks like I decided to stop giving birth and throw on a pair of stretch pants.

I envy envy envy those Playboy type gals that are fit and tiny and sexy.  I have been called  a ->-bleeped-<- many times.  I've also had people just flat out call me sir on several occasions.    And I'm cis.

So I learned a long time ago that "The longer you look in the mirror,  the uglier you get."

So stop it.  You're pretty and delicate looking.  Unless you are hoisting cows over your shoulder during the day  I would not clock you at all.   


One thing I mentioned in another thread is that the difference between cis and trans is that cis girls learn really fast what works and what doesn't.   I will never be   Jennifer Aniston or Sienna Miller.   But I can be Uma Thurman or Annie Lennox on a good day.  Work what you have and ignore the rest.  There's not too much you can do about it. 

Love yourself for you.

"Be yourself; everyone else is already taken."
― Oscar Wilde

Mixie, the photo for your avatar  looks great! ^_^ you're a beautiful person both inside and out. *huggles*
  •  

Rabbit

Quote from: mixie on February 18, 2012, 01:09:49 AM
One thing I mentioned in another thread is that the difference between cis and trans is that cis girls learn really fast what works and what doesn't. 

This is soooooo true... it is why we should be super extra careful in how we present! Taking things slow (very slow) as you work in one element at a time into your look is a good way to keep from shocking those around you (and more importantly, it means you aren't making a billion mistakes at once. At worse you are making a single tiny mistake in makeup or something as you first start to explore it).

My biggest fear is going dilusional and starting to try to pull off stuff that everyone else sees is completely ugly / horrible. We have all seen it... cis people do it too... I don't know, maybe I am too paranoid of it? ... ehh, extra caution is never bad though :P
  •  

rachl

Quote from: Rabbit on February 18, 2012, 05:00:23 AM
This is soooooo true... it is why we should be super extra careful in how we present! Taking things slow (very slow) as you work in one element at a time into your look is a good way to keep from shocking those around you (and more importantly, it means you aren't making a billion mistakes at once. At worse you are making a single tiny mistake in makeup or something as you first start to explore it).


Any wisdom to share? :)
  •  


Stephe

Quote from: Rabbit on February 18, 2012, 05:00:23 AM
My biggest fear is going dilusional and starting to try to pull off stuff that everyone else sees is completely ugly / horrible. We have all seen it... cis people do it too...

Yep. I have learned this lesson and have learned what NOT to wear. Also what makeup looks good and what looks horrid. Even earrings and jewelry might look good on some person but look bad on you. It's not something you learn over night.
  •  

Steffi

Mixie
I think you are stunningly beautiful      - and CANNOT understand WTF the people who are insulting you could be thinking at all.

But thank you very much for your post.

btw ......  Please elope with me    :-*
To those who understand, I extend my hand
To the doubtful I demand, take me as I am
Not under your command, I know where I stand
I won't change to fix your plan, Take me as I am (Dreamtheatre - As I Am)
I started out with nothing..... and I still have most of it left.
  •  

AprilAero

I don't see it as an insult its more of a compliment for me , so many people have told me I am beautiful, and it makes me feel so good.
  •  

Atomic Kitten

Hello Heartwood (Alex)

In your picture you look like a girl to me,don't worry what other people think.
There are some genetic girls who's appearance and demeanour is questionable ( swearing and fighting )
Life is but a dream and this is your dream,make the most of it while you are here.
I have spent ten years of my life abusing myself with drugs to try to suppress these feelings.
Ten wasted years, don't put yourself down.
You don't look like a "->-bleeped-<-" to me.If I offended anyone I am sorry.

Namaste'
Atomic Kitten   
  •  

Keaira

Quote from: mixie on February 18, 2012, 01:09:49 AM
So stop it.  You're pretty and delicate looking.  Unless you are hoisting cows over your shoulder during the day  I would not clock you at all.   

I forgot to add that I 'almost' do something like that every day These two wrenches are tools I use daily. And it's starting to get pretty hard to hold up the 3/4 inch impact gun. And lift knockout bars. I'm beginning to feel like my Sister Jannie is right. She said the other day, "It's cute how you try to be butch, but you're not."

Weighs 14lb


Weighs 2.4lb

That's without the socket to go on them.
  •  

AbraCadabra

* That feeling when people compare you to genetic girls *

Happened just yesterday, "that feeling" when my bff (ex) blurted out: "There must be something wrong with a guy, if he wants a sex-change for a partner..."

Not sure when she said it, she realised for a moment, one such woman with a trans-history was sitting right opposite her... Me.

She (ex) is very supportive and accepts me for what and who I am... - yet, to be honest she has a point, comparing me/us to a genetic woman.
There are plenty single ggs my age about - why on earth would a guy want to get himself into more trouble (with buddies and family) by picking a TG over a GG...?

I first wanted to quiz her on that, but came to think, it is EXACTLY the way she had put it, for her knowing and the environment, friends and family, etc. she lives in.
That reality exists for you/us also, and best is not ignored either.

No need to get on the 'high-road' about it... have another cup of tea and move on.
Be a good girl and smile.
Most all ggs would do, if and when they learned they are just not 'good enough...' --- or: "Well, he's just not THAT much into you..."

Life...
Axélle
Some say: "Free sex ruins everything..."
  •  

AbraCadabra

Quote from: Beverley on February 19, 2012, 06:56:56 AM
Well, we *do* try harder....

Beverley

Hm, and in what 'department' would that be, Bev?

More often guys choose females that do not try hard at all...

Think, think,
Axélle
Some say: "Free sex ruins everything..."
  •  

AbraCadabra

Kiss, kiss honey,

naughty IS a compliment for a TG my age,
not really for a GG... now so much for comparing us... :-)

Axélle
Some say: "Free sex ruins everything..."
  •  

Stef_26

OMG you're so right and I find this a very interesting topic. I would feel quite nervous if I were to go to a group like this. I'd try to be as nice as possible though

I think some people like the 'bitchiness' as though it were a specific gender trait *sigh* ::)
  •  

Alyx.

Quote from: mixie on February 18, 2012, 01:09:49 AM
To the OP  you remember when I complimented your pix in another thread.  You are one of those "fairy faced girls" that I used to envy the crap out of when I was younger.  I actually changed my avatar so you can see I'm not completely adverse to make up.  This is a pix that a friend of mine forced me into make up and gussying up.

Fairy Faced, bahahaha, yeah right. You're way more pretty then me. :P

I pass irl about 0 percent of the time so I guess I just come off as female in pictures or something. I hope me and others start seeing what you see soon! <3

Quote from: Atomic Kitten on February 19, 2012, 02:48:07 AM
Hello Heartwood (Alex)

In your picture you look like a girl to me,don't worry what other people think.
There are some genetic girls who's appearance and demeanour is questionable ( swearing and fighting )
Life is but a dream and this is your dream,make the most of it while you are here.
I have spent ten years of my life abusing myself with drugs to try to suppress these feelings.
Ten wasted years, don't put yourself down.
You don't look like a "->-bleeped-<-" to me.If I offended anyone I am sorry.

Namaste'
Atomic Kitten   

I'm one of those swearing girls. :P Maybe if I acted more like my gender people will start to see it, hmm?
If you do not agree to my demands... TOO LATE
  •  

peky

Quote from: Steffi on February 15, 2012, 10:16:06 PM
sometimes I see cis women day to day and do get jealous ....... but so do cis girls get envious of other, prettier girls so I can live with that.


Good point Steffi !

I see TS and Trasvestites only in the television or internet, but I live in a big city and my work takes me to many places. I do not compare myself with anybody but I do observe many women. The vast majoritey are less atractive than  many of you -including you Steffi.

I think we tend to be hypercritical of ourselves; maybe we should all lay off the mirror :)

Peky
  •  

Atomic Kitten

Hello Heartwood (Alex)

I do not mean to get all spiritual on you here but in Buddhism two parts of the The Noble Eightfold Path
is Right Speech and Right Action if you can practice this you will go far.
I use to swear a lot but I heard a wise Sage say that when you swear it shows your lack of intelligence.
From that day on I have never sworn again,this is just my opinion and again if I offend anybody I am sorry.
But in today's society swearing is getting totally out of control and this is one of many reason's why I live
a solitary existence .
Where I live you often hear 9 year olds walking past using the F### and C### word and I find that disgusting.
Call me a prude if you will,that is OK I have been called worse.
Those same children pick up this "FILTH" from their families,where I come from if you do not swear people think there is
something wrong with you but I beg to differ.
This is not directed at anyone on this forum but it is just my opinion and again I am sorry if anyone takes offence.

Namaste'

Atomic Kitten
  •  

justmeinoz

I stopped worrying when I realised there is no way I will ever have cellulite, and that thanks to the late start, my boobs won't start sagging until I'm in my 80's.   :laugh:

Karen.
"Don't ask me, it was on fire when I lay down on it"
  •  

AbraCadabra

Quote from: Beverley on February 20, 2012, 03:52:18 AM
That is the secret. If you want to be thought of as a woman, it is a good idea to behave like one.

Beverley

Hit the nail on the head Bev, eh :-)

I was at a wake on Saturday and no one clocked me - there were folks that knew me pre-transition but they did not apparently mention anything.

Now on such gf outed me later on in my absents and every one was taken a back. The one woman had even offered to stand guard when I had to do a "Veltie" (wee in the veld) and this being a first for me --- I did a good job of it. (I was desperate)

So it's nice to hear no one clocked me - but I also didn't like to be outed just for the fun and entertainment of it.

Life...
Axélle

Some say: "Free sex ruins everything..."
  •  

justmeinoz

I played a game of Boules with a mixed group this afternoon and the only comments were that I had 'Beginners Luck'.  The women were all my age or older, and no one twigged.  The men were all perfect gentlemen too.

Doing that at a funeral was disrespectful in my book Misha. 

Karen.
"Don't ask me, it was on fire when I lay down on it"
  •  

Steffi

Quote from: BeverleyWell, maybe one day you can do her a 'favour' in return.

Beverley
LOL - there speaks a woman  :)
To those who understand, I extend my hand
To the doubtful I demand, take me as I am
Not under your command, I know where I stand
I won't change to fix your plan, Take me as I am (Dreamtheatre - As I Am)
I started out with nothing..... and I still have most of it left.
  •