Susan's Place Logo

News:

Visit our Discord server  and Wiki

Main Menu

therapy?

Started by chunk, April 08, 2007, 05:03:12 PM

Previous topic - Next topic

0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic.

chunk

Has anyone gone to a therapist specifically for something like being androgyne?

Chunk
  •  

Casey

Specifically? No, but we touch on that in my sessions. (OK, sometimes that IS the session.) It's all part and parcel of me figuring out who I am.

You'll want someone who is familiar with or specializes in gender issues/gender identity issues. And be prepared to do a little educating. They're great when it comes to TSs and TGs whose gender is the opposite of their sex. But when it comes to androgynes sometimes you're the one who bridges the gap between what they learned in school and how that works in the real world. They catch on real quick though.

You know that model with high/low masculinity and high/low femininity? He got that, but he didn't quite get that being in the high masculinity/high femininity quadrant took me off the "male" scale and into the both/other/neither realm we live in. But once I overlayed the color spectrum on the gender spectrum and told him that I'm green, he got it and has been with me ever since.
  •  

seldom

Just be prepared, and keep an open mind on who you are.
I sought therapy because my gender identity issues were causing me a significant amount of anxiety and it was begining to effect my life.

I ended up with one of the best therapist in the country regarding these issues.

Therapy will open the floodgates to your soul, and you have to know that.  But if these issues are causing problems I highly recommend it. 

  •  

Kendall

I went to my first therapist when I first went to college for anxiety, depression, head aches, confusion, fears, hatred, and pain. And also a grudge that I had with a relative. So I wasnt searching for a therapist of gender specialization. What happened though is that as I talked and layers were pealed off, the root of such problems where that hidden side of me that was extremely androgynic. And I realized I had been squishing, suppressing, and hurting myself for most of my life. I am thankfull for the help I receive not just for gender related things, but for helping me feel more free from the chains that were ... killing me.

She never used the word 'androgyne'. That wasnt in my nor her vocabulary, though we did use "androgynous", and concepts like 'own mixture of gender expression" and talked about how maybe inside I am both a boy and a girl.

I still go back and revisit that time period sometimes when I have bad days, and need some inspiration.

Now her specialization was actually different then gender, though she was willing to go that way and help me learn about me.

  •  

Shana A

When I first came out as transgender, I found a therapist who specialized in gender issues. At the time I identified as m2f, and was in therapy for a couple of years, during which time I did RLT. I haven't been to anyone since identifying as androgyne, but wouldn't rule it out if I had issues that I wanted to work on.

zythyra
"Be yourself; everyone else is already taken." Oscar Wilde


  •  

Jet

I know I'm not the topic started... but this is interesting to me actually... just wondering, how would you bring this up with a therapist... I figure I want to talk to someone about this... but there's no one offline I can talk to about gender issues, I tried to a friend once... and he just assumed I was talking about transgender... which was wrong, so I just stopped bothering trying to talk about it lol
  •  

Casey

That depends, Jet. If you already have a therapist, I've always liked the "this is gonna sound weird, but" approach. I'd personally have to trust them before I brought it up though. I'd need to be reasonably certain they weren't going to freak out on me irregardless of their thoughts on the issue.

If you don't have a therapist, you'd want to make sure you find a therapist that's familiar with gender issues. I asked my doctor for a referral. That didn't pan out, so I checked the Internet for the 462nd time and found somebody literally across the street from where I work. (I don't drive so location is extremely important to me.) He actually didn't work with people with gender issues but he knew someone that did. He asked a few quick questions just to make sure we were on the same page. I called that person, who did a quick interview over the phone to see if it was worth me coming in and going into greater detail. So even before my first session he had a rough idea of what was going on. And since it was over the phone, there was still some anonymity.

They've got a whole professional network going on. So somebody will know somebody who can help. You've got to give them some reason for needing to see them, so say you have gender issues or issues with gender identity or whatever is true for you that tells them what you need to talk about but is still fairly generic, and pay attention to their response.
  •  

Jet

Thanks for the info... might look into that once I move away to unil... no point getting a new one locally (my current one, who I think is too busy to see me currently anyway... is Roman Catholic... not sure how much that'd be ok with it... lol)
  •  

Kendall

Mine I didnt bring up at first but I discussed other problems, then we talked about me and my family and childhood experiences. Then we talked about the pains, fears , and anxieties. During that time is when I revealed to her what I did with crossdressing behavior. As we dug into that part of my life, she asked why I did it, how I felt when I did it, and how I related/identified when I did it. Right there is when I revealed how I felt about being between genders.

I am positive that I could have never instantly revealed that part of me in the first visit. I am a very shy person, that has kept this part of me secret for years up to then. It took me around 3 months of going through other problems, pain, and fears to get to that point. I still am shy and get nervous when talking about it to new people, but have found that getting past that so far has been mostly a battle of fear, and the repression hasnt caused the pain and confusion anymore.
  •  

Jet

so would you say talking to a therapist about this, might be worth it?
  •  

Casey

It might be, Jet. It all depends on what you're looking to get out of it. A good therapist can definitely help you make sense of how you fit into this crazy world, especially when we have to find our own way, and give you some great feedback. Personally, I would say if you're considering it then give it a try. It will "only" cost you the price of one or two visits if it's not right for you, and in that case they can probably point you to someone or something that is right for you.
  •  

Kendall

You can try it once to see how it is, and if it brings the desired results you would like. You do get only a certain amount of time, and so be ready with what you want to cover, most important first, to least important. To get the most out of your money. It is your money, so you can judge based off the first visit.

Or like Casey said, get referred to someone else, if that person cant help you.
  •