Quote from: BlueSloth on September 02, 2012, 03:49:01 AM
Wait a minute, is all this coming out stuff about coming out of the forest, or coming out of the closet?
I like the forest.
The forest became home. It was a way of 'coming out of the closet'.
It's still home, wouldn't trade it for anything.
As things change, for myself, as society changes, it serves no useful purpose to hide away here.
If ever we are going to be accepted as legitimate Trans* people in our own right, we need to be visible.
This may just be a personal thing, to maintain ourselves as visible, for each of us.
It may be becoming more visible in our communities, the world.
It's not for everyone to just walk out and proclaim that I am Trans*.
But hiding away in the safety of the forest may not be all that beneficial in the long run for some of us.
We can, of course, never be seen by anyone but maybe some of the other forest dwellers. No problem there.
It's up to each of us, on our own terms, to define just how visible we are in real life.
It would be a more perfect world if we didn't have to worry or care what others may think.
But that's never the perfect world for anyone.
In some ways, we will never be able to function in a truly 'stealth' mode.
I think for some Trans* people, life would be more accepting if those who chose stealth, hadn't.
It's not hard to understand why they have. Life goes on, just as it should.
Cis* people would have a much better understanding that it is not just a 'man in a dress', as it were.
The same thing applies to us, but because we are fundamentally different as Trans*, stealth is not defined as such.
For sure, the stereotypes applies to varying degrees, as it does for everyone.
But we have, in a lot of cases, the ability to be running in a semi-stealth kind of mode.
Cis people aren't as likely to be finger pointing and commenting on what they don't understand.
We can, a lot of the time, be seen as just effeminate males or tomboys.
Society gives us more leeway. They haven't a clue that 'unicorns' do actually exist.
They get the androgynous presentation, they don't understand Androgyn, or being non-binary.
Coming out of the forest is a function of telling society that we are real.
The fashion industry is a good example and it is making us more visible, and more acceptable.
We have a long ways to go. Bigots of the world have united behind the religious right.
There comes a time for some of us to shed the effeminate male or tomboy look for who we are.
To stand up and be counted as just another person. To be judged as people, not some aberration.
For sure, people are judged by their looks all the time.
Different people appeal to others in different ways. Or don't appeal in their appearance.
But it is rare that a person would be considered to not be a person just by presentation alone.
Bigots rely on misguided moral bearings to justify their viewpoints, their fears, that they try to force on society.
They will always be around, being bigots about this or that. Some of us do the very same thing.
We are becoming more accepted all the time, by a growing majority of people.
It's getting to be acceptable to be able to leave the forest when we want, to not have to hide.
Many Trans* people have been hiding out of fear. We have less to fear than ever before.
That's not to say that there isn't still reasons to live in some kind of fear, there's just less of it.
Maybe it's not so much coming out of the closet as it is leaving the door open.
Maybe it's not so much leaving the forest as it is inviting people to visit.
I prefer the latter, to be honest. I'm still not ready to just walk out into the world.
But I am more than willing to show anyone around the many paths that are a part of the forest.
It's a fine place to be for those of us who so choose.
Visitors can learn it is a home for many people. Who are not unlike themselves.
There are going to be some who will come out of their closets and choose to stay.
Becoming more visible is a win situation.
You become more acceptable of yourself.
It helps to dispel the fears that aren't justifiable, even when some will still be.
Others are more willing to accept you.
It helps to dispel that myth of 'a man in a dress' stereotype.
(Regardless of those bigots within the Trans* world who would place that blame on us because the fashion world accepts us.)
(It is unfortunate that some will find anything to force their personal viewpoints, their fears, onto others)
It is helping the Cis people to understand, and as they understand it more, the more acceptable we all become.
By being more visible, we help other Trans* people, which in turn helps us, greatly.
We all have this opportunity to make life better for everyone, with less bigotry in the world.
We can take it and run.
We can just do what we feel comfortable in doing to help that.
We don't have to do anything.
We have a choice, and whatever that choice is, it will be right for you to make it.
I have chosen to move forward, one step at a time. With less fear than I had before.
I might not be leaving the forest, but I am willing to step out of it when it suites me.
I am not alone. None of us are. Not anymore.
Ativan
