Yeah, I'm published. It's at a place called "Susan's Place."
Seriously, many decades ago I won a Quill and Scroll Award for having the "Best Editorial in a High School Newspaper in the U.S." Very big deal. I got a certificate in the mail and everything. My editorial was about how our school buses were "Unsafe At Any Speed" (Ralph Nader was, at the time, very much in the news as he tried to fight G.M. over the Corvair's safety record). The main problem our shool had was there were not enough buses. The brilliant solution was to have three kids sit in seats designed for two kids. The third kid had to ride uncomfortably, one butt cheek on the seat, the other hanging in mid-air in the bus aisle. Girls at the school never had to sit that way, of course. They boarded the bus first and then could save seats for the popular guys. This lead to Gump-like situations where we non-masculine guys and nerds would end up hanging precariously in the aisle, praying the bus didn't go around corners too quickly. Luckily, the ride home was only forty minutes. Looking back, I find it a wonder that all the guys in the school didn't decide right then and there to become female.
These days (stop me if you've heard this one before), I'm working on my great American screenplay. Also (highly original, I know), I dabble in creating my autobiographical transsexual transition story. Ooop, wait....knocking at the door. Probably my literary agent. Hope it's not Ed McMahon! What a pest...Aw, Geez! "Leave me alone, Ed! No! I don't want any more of your money!"