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I'm not sure.. May haps you know?

Started by Erik, June 15, 2012, 09:55:39 PM

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Erik

So here's my dilemma; for the last few years of my life I've questioned my gender. Not the sex, I am a female and don't want to change that, but sometime I feel wrong and feel the need to dress as a man. When I do, I feel better. And then other days I just feel like a girl and dress as such.

I'm so confused. I don't know if I could consider myself a crossdresser, since I do feel like a boy on the inside some days (I even prefer to go by Erik on those days), it's not just tomboyish or wanting to defy gender-roles.  But then do I count as a transgender because I don't feel like a boy all the time. Nor transsexual because I don't want surgery, I'm cissexual, but not cisgendered.

So which am I? Crossdresser or transgender, or is there something else I've not heard of yet? :-\ I appreciate any insight, thoughts or help.
"We are so accustomed to disguise ourselves to others that in the end we become disguised to ourselves."  ~François Duc de La Rochefoucauld
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Shawn Sunshine

It seems to me you might be a "two spirit" or a dual gender person. One can either be psychically both genders
(intersex of some sort by way of chromosomes or by way of hormones)
or mentally both genders or as some Native Americans believe "spiritually" dual gender as well.

I have been discovering for myself there is quite a complex idea of gender. I have come to realize that the sex part of myself (the outward appearance) does not match up to my mind and spirit. I was born 46 XY male but the doctor says I may actually have Mild AIS (Androgen Insensitivity Syndrome, which is a mild form of intersex in the body as far as hormones go. I know for sure my mind and spirit are differnt too.

My suggestion is to explore with a therapist or psychologist (best to get one that is both) that can help you discover things. Then seek out support groups or other people and in my opinion try and sense who you are via mind,body and spirit.

I am going to start embracing my female side and see just how far I really am along the spectrum and where it leads with time.
Shawn Sunshine Strickland The Strickalator

#SupergirlsForJustice
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SourCandy

*huggles* I'm no expert, but maybe it's not all gender and something of a personality split, I knew a girl for a long time who would talk about sometimes feeling like another person, who was a guy. I don't know what's going on in your heart but that sounds very similar to how she was, it just kind of faded over time for her as other things in her life started to become more stable, but that's not really a answer for you.
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Edge

lol Hi. From the sounds of it, I'd guess you are bigender or genderfluid. Yes, we count as transgender.
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Erik

^^ wow, thanks for the replies!

@strickalator dual-spirit? fascinating :) I'll have to look into that more to see if it matches...

@sourcandy [[yay huggles  :D ]] that's actually kind of what it's like. Erik is almost like a second  person entirely. We just share a body. It's hard to explain without sounding insane  ;D

@Edge ah, interesting. I like the sound of genderfluid. Even if I'm not necessarily so, it still sounds cool. I'll have to look into that!
"We are so accustomed to disguise ourselves to others that in the end we become disguised to ourselves."  ~François Duc de La Rochefoucauld
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Taka

read everything you can find on the topic in the androgyne section. there are more labels to choose between

for people who are somewhere between neither and both or something else entirely, it can be a little difficult to figure out what fits the most. there's genderqeer, genderfluid, bigender, androgyne, two-spirit, plutonian... i think you just have to explore, read and talk to people. the androgyne section is a good place to do that
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