Hi Magaale, and welcome. I'm Laura.
That's a tough spot to be in, girl. I'm sorry to hear you're struggling. From reading many peoples experiences on this site and others, the outcomes of those in similar situations have been many. Me, I am ostracized from half of my family because of the religion they still observe, which I was also raised in. Although this is not because of my ->-bleeped-<-, it
was because their beliefs upset my conscience and made me unhappy, so I had to leave the religion, which caused my mother and sister to shun me (in accordance with their religion's teachings).
So when you're at a crossroads like that, it comes to a tough, tough, tough decision. Some people have been surprised by their family's acceptance, while others, sadly, have lost family because of their transition. Even then, sometimes they do eventually come around. If it is something you feel you must do to truly live your life happily, then you just have to grit you're teeth, do what you have to do, and hope for the best. Also, know that there will always be others, like the family here at Susan's, and other support groups, who will be there to lend support and reassurance.
I would think, first of all, you should probably see a therapist to sort out and help you make sense of all these feelings. I am actually in the process of choosing one at the moment myself(as well as budgeting to make it happen). Its usually everybody's first step.
Glad you've shared with us (your English was just fine) and I hope for the best for you with your parents. Feel free to message me in the future if you wish to talk.