I just got back from my therapist.She told me right at the end of the session that my worrying about being too egotistical before as a male was due to my using Ego as a defense mechanism.I never thought of it that way.Does anyone know this to be true?I have always kicked myself for being such an @##hole by being overly ego bound: so if what she says is true I can probably find a way to get rid of it.
Any input will be welcome.

I once heard an older fella say that he was "neither better than, nor worse than anyone else."

Simple... but it had a profound effect on me in my (partially successful) pursuit of humility.

Don't know you Collette, but I've sure seen people where this is true. If you are truly secure in yourself, you don't have anything to prove to anyone. If you feed your ego, sometimes it means you don't think as well of yourself, and feeding your ego is a defense mechanism to avoid facing that.

Hope this helps. Good luck.

Thank you for the feed back.
She was telling me that I dont give myself enough credit for overcoming some of the stuff in my life that was terrible.
So I suppose giving myself credit differs from being egotistical.Is it just a matter of degree?I am not very self assured nor secure about a lot of things.I hope I can better myself regardless until I become more secure.Transitioning so late in life has made me second guess a lot but I see progress.
I really do appreciate this forum and the peoples feedback.It is so helpful.

In short, yes IT IS TRUE.
EGO is different from true SELF and EGO is created and overlaying SELF so as to FIT IN, and create the least issues with the SELF living in a given social environment, including of course parents and THEIR believe system... i.e. also their EGO.

So, YES, the EGO is there, essentially to protect us, defend us. If the EGO and its expression is too far removed from the ACTUAL felt and experienced SELF, trouble is bound to happen.
We get neurotic at best, some might withdraw into insanity at worst or suicide, yet another added form of defence. Suicide as a form of complete withdrawal from an un-defendable situation... if all those other defences did not work.

So, I happen to agree with your therapist, by what I have seen within myself - and of course with others... during therapy and mostly Large Group Awareness Trainings, I later on assisted with after I gone through them myself...
There are yet other experiences, like exorcism that pointed exactly the same way.

Axélle