Well, I seem to be going in the right direction and I'm hoping that by or around X-Mas time I can start T. My issue is whether or not I should try and find a new job when I start T.
I have an advantage. The company I work for has an anti-harrassment policy for gender identity. So I am protected in that sense. But what sucks is that ALL my co-workers know me as female.

What am I supposed to do? I assume I'd go to the manager and explain my situation. But this scares the crap out of me. And once I tell him, what would happen? Would he explain things to co-workers or would this fall on me? I honestly never wanted so many people to know. I don't like that they will. Which again, is why I'm wondering if I should just find another job.

Well,  I transitioned on the job.  I told my "team" of about six folks -- the company has over 100 employees.

I first approached HR -- and told them I was transgender and that I wanted to start going by a shortened version of my name - which was a male name.  They changed my email and the directory on the web.  So, I started signing everything with my shorten names .  Then I told my "team" and they started using it and male pronouns.  My team also got three new members and HR introduced them to me using male pronouns. 

I never formally announced that I was transgender to the company but everyone calls me by my male name and everyone is working on using male pronouns.  It hasn't been bad but sometimes its frustrating and I wish that I could be at a place that everyone only knew me as male.

I'm actually facing this same problem myself. I started the job I'm working now about a year ago. I was already out to my friends and family when I got the job, but since I knew I wasn't going to be on T for a while I didn't tell anyone at my job I was trans. I always told myself I would just quit my job when I started T, but now that date is less than 6 months away and I really don't want to leave my job. I work in the kitchen of a local country club and I know my co workers would be fine with the fact that I'm trans, but I don't think my bosses would be very accepting. I think when the time comes I'm just going to quit because even though I love my job and the people I work with, I would still much rather find a new job where I'm stealth.

Quote from: skakid on August 24, 2012, 11:09:06 AM
I'm actually facing this same problem myself. I started the job I'm working now about a year ago. I was already out to my friends and family when I got the job, but since I knew I wasn't going to be on T for a while I didn't tell anyone at my job I was trans. I always told myself I would just quit my job when I started T, but now that date is less than 6 months away and I really don't want to leave my job. I work in the kitchen of a local country club and I know my co workers would be fine with the fact that I'm trans, but I don't think my bosses would be very accepting. I think when the time comes I'm just going to quit because even though I love my job and the people I work with, I would still much rather find a new job where I'm stealth.

I think the ideal situation would be to get another job and be stealth. But in this economy I don't know how lucky I'd actually get. Maybe T will give me confidence I don't have right now lol Or rather maybe it would just allow me to not care as much what people would think. It's a matter of not wanting to get treated like a freak at work, and I am a private person and don't want the world knowing this.

Yeah, this is tough. What kind of job is it? I think it depends a lot on the company/industry you're in. It's great that they cover gender identity in the discrimination policy though unfortunately it's not always well enforced. What's the work climate like? Do you hear people joking about lgbt stuff inappropriately? It never hurts to be looking for another job. In your situation it would probably be helpful to start formulating a backup plan incase you need to move on. Even if they are accepting, I've always felt a little uncomfortable in environments where everyone knew me before. Started a new job earlier this year and have really enjoyed the fresh environment where people just see me for me. But that's just me, I imagine if you really like your job and the people you work with it would prob feel okay to stay.

Quote from: lexical on August 24, 2012, 12:16:22 PM
Yeah, this is tough. What kind of job is it? I think it depends a lot on the company/industry you're in. It's great that they cover gender identity in the discrimination policy though unfortunately it's not always well enforced. What's the work climate like? Do you hear people joking about lgbt stuff inappropriately? It never hurts to be looking for another job. In your situation it would probably be helpful to start formulating a backup plan incase you need to move on. Even if they are accepting, I've always felt a little uncomfortable in environments where everyone knew me before. Started a new job earlier this year and have really enjoyed the fresh environment where people just see me for me. But that's just me, I imagine if you really like your job and the people you work with it would prob feel okay to stay.

It's just a retail job. I got it to help pay for tuition. My mom has basically paid for the first two years and I want to pay for the rest. So I'm just a sales associate at a store. The situation just sucks. But things are going to go one of two ways. I stay, or I leave because I've found another job. But either way I need to have money for tuition.

Quote from: Stewie on August 24, 2012, 12:20:47 PM
It's just a retail job. I got it to help pay for tuition. My mom has basically paid for the first two years and I want to pay for the rest. So I'm just a sales associate at a store. The situation just sucks. But things are going to go one of two ways. I stay, or I leave because I've found another job. But either way I need to have money for tuition.

I hear ya, tuition's a killer. Knee deep in student loans here. As for your original questions, yeah I would go to your manager if you're comfortable talking to him. If not, try to find someone who can get you connected with your HR department. Ideally they would let you decide how to proceed in terms of who to tell and how/when. Given that it's a big company I'm sure they've dealt with this issue many times before. Good luck man, I hope things work out well with this.

Here are a few other things to consider. Will you be putting down your current job on your job history? If so, a prospective employer might want to get in touch with your old boss. I don't think it's very likely, but it's possible.

Have you changed your sex marker on your driver's license? I'm assuming that your sex with the SSA will stay the same, but I understand that the SSA isn't sending out "mismatch" letters anymore when the sex marker doesn't match what they have on file. This should give you greater flexibility.

If you haven't changed your name yet and plan to, will you change your name at the old job? Think of the advantages and disadvantages of doing so.

As you pointed out, the economy isn't so great. If you want another job, you're better off looking for work while you are still employed. If you're not getting any nibbles, you can always go to Plan B and stick with the old job.

Is it more important to you to be working or to maintain your privacy?

Can you get a job on campus?