Opening the cage

[Moonflower]

Just tonight I happened to notice my wife's phone, and while she was texting my son and in our group chat, I noticed that she'd changed my name to my new name in it. That's something that I wouldn't ever really see. It's just for her.. but seeing it, made me smile.

I don't want to miss a single opportunity to have that kind of effect.

You, your wife, my wife, and I have such important stories to share. When I began learning about trans, I was overwhelmed by the warnings that most trans people lose significant others.

I couldn't see any reason why I would disconnect from her in any way. She's such an important, valuable part of my life! Her public self expression is so thrilling and means so much to me! As she said the other day, people are responding to her so much more kindly than they did to "him".

[Moonflower]

Congrats on the first steps in the name change process! Just started looking at that and it seems like a long road!!!

Just now, I started putting together a checklist to help her manage it:
First, social security, then driver's license, then birth certificate.
Citizenship and immigration documentation, such as a passport or visa.
Voter registration.
Workplace and school records.
Military/veteran records.
Licensing boards and professional associations.
Financial institutions including banks, lenders, credit unions, credit cards, investment companies/brokerages, and retirement or pension accounts.
Legal documentation and accounts for real estate and personal property (vehicles), including deeds, mortgages or lease agreements.
Legal documents including those where listed as an agent, beneficiary, or trustee, such as a Deed, Last Will and Testament, Living Trust or Power of Attorney.
Insurance documents including health, auto, home, renters, umbrella, and life.
Bills, including electric, water, sewer, fuel, internet, cellphone, memberships, medical, shopping, and subscriptions.
Social media and email accounts.
Health care proxies.

Do any others come to mind? We can post this list on another board where others are more likely to find it.

[imallie]

That seems excellent. It seems to me... at the onset (just printed out the name change paperwork for my state) that the whole process is a bit like whack-a-mole. You just keep knocking down each thing when it pops up until, hopefully, eventually you "win". 😂

[LoriDee]

I also sent a certified copy of the name change to each of the three credit bureaus, TransUnion, Experian, and EquiFax. That helps speed things along because then their information matches what the banks and credit cards are reporting.