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Finding out who your real friends are.

Started by CosmicJoke, January 19, 2026, 10:54:37 AM

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CosmicJoke

Hi everyone. I'm actually interested if anybody else has found this too? Do you find that some people that weren't nice to you before are now just because you transitioned?

I think I've seen this happen. I try to be open however to whoever wants to be in my life. Maybe they really have changed and genuinely want to be supportive?

It's an interesting thing. I also think you have to be careful because in some cases people aren't always trustworthy.

Does anyone have any experiences to share?

ChrissyRyan

Not really.  But this seems to be a good reception change for you.  That is a plus, it seems.

Chrissy
Always stay cheerful, be polite, kind, and understanding. Accepting yourself as the woman you are is very liberating.  Never underestimate the appreciation and respect of authenticity.  Help connect a person to someone that may be able to help that person.  Be brave, be strong.  A TRUE friend is a treasure.  Relationships are very important, people are important, and the sooner we all realize that the better off the world will be.  Try a little kindness.  Be generous with your time, energy, wisdom, and resources.   Inconvenience yourself to help someone.   I am a brown eyed, brown haired woman. 

Dances With Trees

All the people who have been nice to me since affirming my gender variance are here. On Susan's Place. Most people from my past no longer talk to me. Except for a couple of sisters and my daughter. Fortunately, you can pick your friends. Family? Not so much.

Sephirah

Quote from: CosmicJoke on January 19, 2026, 10:54:37 AMI think I've seen this happen. I try to be open however to whoever wants to be in my life. Maybe they really have changed and genuinely want to be supportive?

It's also possible that you have changed and are more open to the outside world. :) Whether you transition or not, self-acceptance is like getting the key to a prison you never really knew you were locked inside.

We all read body language and subtle cues given off by the people around us. When you're keeping yourself hidden away, you're sending off signals that you don't want people to look for you. Often because you don't want to look for you. So often they don't.

As Annika alluded to, though, sometimes it isn't retroactive. Sometimes people who knew you before have their own issues, based on how they feel about trans people. And some of those never go away. Nothing to do with who you are, and what kind of friend you are. It depends on the individual and in those cases, all you can really do is just accept it and move on.

My rule of thumb is to be kind and friendly to everyone until they give you a reason not to be. And then be their worst nightmare And then smile and move on in your life. ;)
Natura nihil frustra facit.

"You yourself, as much as anybody in the entire universe, deserve your love and affection." ~ Buddha.

If you're dealing with self esteem issues, maybe click here. There may be something you find useful. :)
Above all... remember: you are beautiful, you are valuable, and you have a shining spark of magnificence within you. Don't let anyone take that from you. Embrace who you are. <3