I can't do this alone. Help

[BecomingMonica]

* * *  Trigger warning * * *

Hello I am Monica Scott. My birth name is Christopher. I was three helping put laundry away. As I grabbed a pair of my step mothers panties I had this almost electric sensation and in my mind I thought. I should be a girl. I hated my male parts. They felt gross and wrong.  I was groomed at the age of three by a babysitter my drug addicted drunk and violent reaction at the site of me. The only kindness anyone had shown me was this male. I came out to three girls in grade and they loved it. They all passed down their old clothes. Life has tried to take my life many times. I beg for death and then I remember I'm trans and I feel warm and calm. I really need friends and support. I would love to make friends with all of you.

[Rochelle]

Hello and welcome to Susan's Place. Hopefully you can find some answers that you are looking for here. This community is here for people like you looking for help and support. You can find alot of answers in the forums and can always ask questions from the users. A member of the welcoming team should be along shortly to officially welcome you. We're happy you're here. 💚

[Lori Dee ✅]

Hello Monica,

I'm Lori Dee. Welcome to Susan's Place!

Thank you for that wonderful introduction.

We strive to make this a safe space for you to find information and share your thoughts and comments. No matter who you are, you are always welcome at Susan's Place.

You can find a lot of information and support here. You are not alone.

When you click on the HOME button, you will see a page listing all of the various sub-forums by category and topic. Each sub-forum has a description of what that forum is about, as well as any guidelines for posting.

Please keep in mind when posting that this is an ALL-AGES  PUBLIC  Forum and the internet never forgets. Do not post anything that you do not want to be made public.

I will add links below that are important for new and returning members.
Pay special attention to the links in RED.

If you have any questions about the Susan's Place site and the Forums, please feel free to contact me at LoriDee605@outlook.com.

Once again, welcome to Susan's Place!

~ Lori Dee
Forum Staff

Things that you should read

• New Members... Please Read this First
• Site Terms of Service & Rules to Live By
• Site Policies and stuff to remember
• Changing Your Forum Name
• Membership Agreement
• Cautionary Note
• How to Contact Forum Staff Members
• Standard Terms & Definitions
• News posting & quoting guidelines
• Photos, avatars, & signature images

• Crisis Support and Help Groups

@BecomingMonica
@Sarah B
@Charlotte Kitty
@Northern Star Girl

[Petunia]

Hi Monica,
You need some support and understanding.

You will find a lot of that here.

You will also find out about yourself more and move toward inner peace.

Have you had any councelling?

It sounds like you need it.
There are so many of us who have benefitted by talking to a trained councellor

[Sarah B ✅]

Hi Monica

My name is Sarah and I would also like to formally, Welcome you to Susan's Place!

I see that other members of Susan's have also welcomed you as well.

Thank you for trusting us with such a personal and painful part of your life.  I am very sorry for the fear, harm and loneliness you have had to carry.  You deserved safety, kindness and care when you were little and you deserve those things now.

I am glad you are here.  The way you describe remembering that you are trans and feeling warmth and calm sounds like a very important part of your strength.  You are not wrong for needing friends, support and understanding.  Many of us know what it feels like to need a place where we can be seen as ourselves.

Please stay close to support right now, especially when thoughts of death feel strong.  You do not have to face those moments alone.  There are people who will listen and help you through the next minute, the next hour and the next day.

There are people ready to support you. Suicide Prevention and Support Resources

Seeking help is a courageous step toward well-being.  At Susan's Place, we understand the importance of mental health support, especially for the transgender and non-binary community.  If you or someone you know is experiencing a crisis, here are some dedicated organizations ready to help you:

The Trevor Project 🔗 [Link: thetrevorproject.org] 🔗 [Link: thetrevorproject.org]

Specialized support for LGBTQ youth.

Helpline (24/7): 1-866-488-7386.
Text and Chat: The Trevor Project chat 🔗 [Link: thetrevorproject.org/get-​help-​now/] 🔗 [Link: thetrevorproject.org/get-help-now/] or text START to 678-678.

988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline 🔗 [Link: 988lifeline.org] 🔗 [Link: 988lifeline.org]

Nationwide, free and confidential support for those in crisis, available 24/7.

Helpline (24/7): Call #988, text #988.
Text and Chat: Chat online 🔗 [Link: 988lifeline.org/chat/] 🔗 [Link: 988lifeline.org/chat/].  Haz clic aquí para el chat en español 🔗 [Link: 988lifeline.org/es/chat/] 🔗 [Link: 988lifeline.org/es/chat/].

Trans Lifeline 🔗 [Link: translifeline.org] 🔗 [Link: translifeline.org]

A grassroots hotline and microgrants non-profit organization for the trans community.

Helpline (24/7): 1-877-565-8860.
Website: Trans Lifeline 🔗 [Link: translifeline.org] 🔗 [Link: translifeline.org]"

You can refer to the original here: Site Terms of Service and rules to live by

Take care and all the best for the future and please come back and let us know how you are going

Once you feel comfortable here, it would be appreciated if you add a little bit more about yourself in the other forums and threads.  I would appreciate it very much as, I'm always interested in learning something new about new members.

In addition members of Susan's will more than likely discuss problems or issues that are similar to yours as most have experienced these issues as well.

Please keep in mind when posting that this is an ALL AGES PUBLIC Forum and the internet never forgets.  Do not post anything that you do not want to be made public.

Take care and all the best for the future.

Once again, Welcome to Susan's Place!

Best Wishes Always
Sarah B
Global Moderator
@Devlyn  @Jessica_Rose  @Mariah  @Northern Star Girl  @Lori Dee @Charlotte Kitty
@BecomingMonica

[ChrissE]

* * *  Trigger warning * * *

Hello I am Monica Scott. My birth name is Christopher. I was three helping put laundry away. As I grabbed a pair of my step mothers panties I had this almost electric sensation and in my mind I thought. I should be a girl. I hated my male parts. They felt gross and wrong.  I was groomed at the age of three by a babysitter my drug addicted drunk and violent reaction at the site of me. The only kindness anyone had shown me was this male. I came out to three girls in grade and they loved it. They all passed down their old clothes. Life has tried to take my life many times. I beg for death and then I remember I'm trans and I feel warm and calm. I really need friends and support. I would love to make friends with all of you.

Would you like to wake up tomorrow and be a female?

[ChrissyRyan]

Welcome Monica!

Chrissy

[Stottie Girl]

Hello from the UK Monica!

I'm Sarah, It's nice to have you with us. I'm sure you will find us a warm and welcoming bunch.

Sarah xx

[ChrissyRyan]

Welcome Chrisse.


The welcoming crew will be by shortly.

Please return to visit again!


Chrissy

[Jillian-TG]

Welcome - you are in a safe space here.

[Stottie Girl]

Would you like to wake up tomorrow and be a female?

I would think most of us would ChrissE! Sadly life is not like that.

[Lori Dee ✅]

Would you like to wake up tomorrow and be a female?

I am already a female. I would like to wake up with my body aligned with my self-perception. After all, that is the very definition of gender dysphoria.