Why transition?

[LilLivvy91]

So i like to think of myself as a philosopher... And my train of thought led me to Transitionville. Why do we do it? Why do we put ourselves through the loss, torment, and physical pain of changing sexes? Just so somebody else acknowledges that you aren't a boy (or girl) after all? Who cares how they feel, its about how you feel. I no doubt have some mental issues regarding my gender. I would like to transition someday... but if it was banned tomorrow i would be content living on as i am now, albeit my weight and lifestyle. I am satisfied knowing i have a gift. Because i think like a woman, i can sympathize with them much better than average men. I know who i am, and mutilating myself isn't gonna change that.  Being a feminine male is enough for me. Currently at least... Im not anti-transition, i just have learned there are much more important things in my life to focus on at the moment.

Any thoughts? Are you good where you are at? Or you want more?

[LordKAT]

I am not doing anything for how others think of me. Bad excuse to transition if that is your only reason.

I need the dissonance between my body and how my mind interprets it to be fixed. I really don't give 2 hoots about what anyone else thinks.

[Jessica Merriman]

In my particular case the Dysphoria started to affect my mental and physical health and was leading down depression road. I had to get transition started because I needed the internal feel of femininity to relax and take my body off of high alert before I totally snapped. It is, in my opinion, not to transition because of how society treated me, but the root chemical causes in my body. Testosterone was just not good for me for some reason. Being on "E" has changed me so much in just the short time I have been on it. I am now calmer, more social, slow to anger and sleep a whole lot easier and better. I no longer feel like a Pit Bull on gunpowder, but normal and well adjusted. I really like the other changes as well and consider them a bonus or something. Even if for some reason I never get to go through SRS, the changes so far have really paid off. Talking to some of my friends going through the same thing feel the same as I do. It is not about the visuals, even though they are great, but the internal changes are what we all sought out and are the happiest about. Hope this helps a little?  By the way, time only grows the Dysphoria monster even bigger. It never goes away.

[DriftingCrow]

The part of me that does want to transition wants to for some physical reasons and social reasons (I want to be treated male). I don't care what people see me as overall.

There's many reasons why I've decided not to transition right now, one if them is that I really dislike taking medicines, seeing doctors, you know, that sort of stuff. I like being more natural I guess.

[Cindy]

Mmmm  mutilating yourself?

I had birth defects, they are being removed by hormones and surgery so my body reflects my brain.

But we are all different. If you are content as you, well be content!

[E-Brennan]

I know who i am, and mutilating myself isn't gonna change that.

A very poor choice of words!  Surgery is not mutilation, and it's certainly not to be put in the same category as self-inflicted injuries which are the result of mental disorders (e.g. cutting).  It's merely a means to have the physical body correspond with the mind which inhabits it.  Nothing more, nothing less.

But you're correct in that some people can live without genital surgery.  I'm one of them - I think I am, at least.  For me, it's more about me knowing that I'm female inside and accepting that fact, and while I'd like for others to see that too and treat me as I want to be treated in society, I'm of the opinion that my genitals really won't alter how people perceive me.  For other people, their dysphoria is such that they have to have bodies that match their minds, and that's cool.

It's whatever works for you.  As long as you end up as happy and comfortable in your own skin as you can be, then anything goes.  But we're all in the same boat, and it's a diverse boat; tolerance of the paths taken by others to reach their own gender goals is vitally important.   

[insideontheoutside]

Honestly I ask the same questions. At one time I actually thought I was weak or lazy or afraid or a number of other reasons why I didn't have the drive to want to put myself and everyone I know or who cares about me through transition. When my brief flirtation with hrt did not work out I was angry about it for a short while. I wanted to have some subtle changes that would push me further into "androgynous male", however my body had some ideas of its own in that department. The whole thing just led me back to an inner knowledge that I've known since I was around 12 years old: if I want to be healthy, I have to listen to my body. I've been into natural stuff since I was about 21 (except for a few years of depression, anxiety, and bad decisions). I feel stronger about living as naturally as I can (as in minimizing and/or eliminating chemicals, etc. from my life) than I ever did about transition. When I went against my gut instinct and tried hrt, my body reacted badly. I even have problems with things as minor as cold meds, so it really was no surprise. Still it was kind of a last resort to make some physical changes and I never planned on doing it for longer than about 6-8 months. And even if that had worked out, I had no intentions of even changing my name let alone doing anything else to transition.

I have my own personal aversion to surgery. I wouldn't call it a fear so much as I'd call it knowledge. When you know medical professionals and surgeons you get kind of the inside scoop. When a surgeon tells you that unless they were in an accident and surgery was the only way to save their life they would avoid surgery at all costs it changes the perspective a bit. I'm not a big risk taker. Even though the odds are that surgery like breast removal usually goes smoothly, I don't need to tempt fate. I wouldn't consider it mutiliation personally, and if there was a way I could just magically wake up without these blobs on my chest I would cry tears of joy. But it's my choice and I choose to not have surgery unless it was a life threatening situation.

Another thing that's completely personal is that I know I would not be satisfied with changing my body via surgery or additional hormones now. I'm generally okay with my overal appearance but I know the body is never going to match my brain. So since I'm not in a situation where I have to transition to keep living at all, I work on just being cool that I'm a different kind of guy. It really helps that I've made a life for myself that I'm pretty happy with and that I do have friends who I'm out to and accept me. My life consists of so mucho more than just my gender, that gets me through a lot.

[LilLivvy91]

My apologies for using the term "mutilation." If you feel surgery is the route for you then do it. I just have a personal moral stance against plastic surgery. I fear and lothe it.

And thank you all for your insight to the topic of discussion. Im really just trying to get to know you all a little better.

[Jessica Merriman]

Im really just trying to get to know you all a little better.

Nothing wrong with that. Hope we helped a little. PM if you ever need anything, we are now family. 

[JoanneB]

To feel comfortable in your own skin
To feel genuine - a complete person
To be able to feel good being you when you look in a mirror

If human kind and society allowed an "I am what I am" person, then there wouldn't even be a thing called Gender Dysphoria. Perhaps in few more tens of thousands of years we'll get there. Meanwhile, how you achieve these goals? What steps you need to take can vary greatly. In all cases "Transition" is not necessary. ( I am reading between your lines that transition is presenting full-time, HRT, GRS, perhaps more).

So why that sort of transition? Perhaps for some it was ingrained into them that that is what you need to do. If (A); Then B; Just like so many other implied "Rules" I tend to see. Or, the middle ground was tried for a time and the need to have more became overwhelming.

[Lyric]

Well, there are two factors worth considering, Lil. One is that we are all different and have our own distinct needs. Some of us definitely need to "transition". Some of us don't. The other is that your situation can change. Who you are was not necessarily etched in stone before your birth. It's perfectly alright to be the the way you feel right now, then change your mind later.

I went through all the am I/should I/if I/whatever stuff a long ago and realized I had no need to become as close to the other gender as possible. Much of me was feminine, but there was plenty that wasn't and I liked it that way. I may not always blend into the crowd, but I always feel good about who I am in my soul.

~ Lyric ~