Ni ... ni ... ni ... nineteen days till GRS with Dr Brassard

[JourneyingSam]

28th Sept - I arrive Montreal ... my only travelling companion Einstein (My teddy bear) ... and probably a bunch of other folks on the plane but I won't know them.

30th Sept - The Op - I'm almost at the point where I am numb about it all... but not quite.  Seems so close ... so much to do ... time flows quickly at times and drags like treacle in the winter at others.

I have plans to visit another girl from this site who is there a few days before me and I suspect that I will get to know a few neew faces, I gather that there are several patients "in the system" at any stage ... feeling a bit alone with all this despite the loving support of my close friends.  I guess this is a journey that we can only make ourselves.

And so I shall be jotting various things here as well as asking questions and ... well just random thoughts.

Sam x

[mrs izzy]

You are in good hands and you will be not alone.

The patient and staff all will fill your time until dilation day and then that will become your friend for a long time.

I and others will always be around to ask questions as needed to help you on those harder days.

Hugs Sam

[Jenna Marie]

Good luck!!! They'll take good care of you.

[dkl]

What izzy said. The nurses are amazing. I actually spent a fair amount of time visiting with my four favorites, and talked to one last week. I was a little nervous about being alone there, but I honestly never felt alone. Izzy also came by to see me (thanks again). I would actually love to go back for a visit, I really feel like I left some friends there.

[JourneyingSam]

I find it ironic ... what is probably one of the most (if not the most) significant medical procedures is approaching ... and they request that I stop the oestrogen that helps my brain run well ... ARGH!!!

It's been about 9 days since my last oestrogen patch and I started to get hot flushes yesterday and have definitely been "off" emotionally the past few days.  Fortunately the business of making sure that I am logistically prepared for the trip has helped take my mind off things as has knowing that this will only be for a couple more weeks.

Sam x

[mrs izzy]

You will survive the short period of lack of your HRT.

Safety is way better.

Hugs.

[JourneyingSam]

Safety is way better.

<Samantha nods in agreement>
Thanks Izzy
I did consider not stopping HRT ... but it is only for a short time and I can;t imagine how I would feel if I had any post op complications and had not done everything I could have to avoid them ...

Sam x

[mrs izzy]

Good girl.

Still plans are up in the air on the week you are here. Will keep you advised if I will be able to stop around.

You will be here before you know.

Hugs

[JourneyingSam]

OMG ... my surgery is now a week tomorrow ... how did that happen!?!?

I look around me at the tip that is my flat and despair that I'll have everything sorted before I fly next Sunday ... this is a double edged sword ...

Being off my oestrogen for a couple of weeks now I am finding that my emotional state flies all over the place.  I was out with a friend for coffee yesterday and feeling very happy, I got a nice text from a friend, she referred to me as Samantha ... which I love ... and I had to go hide in Costa bathroom for 5 minutes to have a good weep!  IT's crazy!  The chaotic flat is not leading me to feel ... ahem ... relaxed and warm and fuzzy!

But yet all this getting ready activity means that I am not brooding on things.  I'm surprisingly blaise about the surgery itself ... which is so not what I was expecting at this point.  I just want to get it over and done with so I can move forward with my life.

I'm planning on moving in the new year (Brighton, UK) and looking for work (IT) there as I won;t have any large medical stuff looming to get in the way ... I'll also be "plumbed" correctly and so intend on getting back into the dating game.

Still there are a lot of miles ... and a huge number of dilations between here and there! I don't want to wish this time away ... but I do! 

Sam x

[mrs izzy]

FYI looks like I will be in the city.

Keep me updated and will come by and chat.

It is all good. 

Hugs
Izzy

[JourneyingSam]

It would be lovely to see you Izzy! <hugs>

Sam x

[dkl]

Hey Sam,

One week, wow that's going to go so fast.  You're going to love the staff at the house.