Un-intended consequences

[MelissaAnn]

For those of you that don't know me I am a 51-year-old MTF living in Chicago. I currently live in a large apartment building where I know the majority of the residents. I've been coming out on my own terms and at my own speed to almost everyone I know. Now, there is a particular gentlemen(Using the term lightly), here, that is a bit sexist and everything seems to have sexual overtone to it. This being said, we have never really seen eye to eye. He was told about me by another resident, which really isn't a big deal to me, but he flat out asked me for sexual favor by saying to me. "Well, now that you think you're a girl, how about a__. This is my first experience with anything to do with this nature. I wasn't sure at first on what to say to him, but just responded you couldn't afford me and walked away. I guess ignorant people will be ignorant all their lives. Have any of you other girls experienced anything like this. It certainly does creep me out.

Hugs,

Melissa Ann

[Foxglove]

Yep.  I once was getting some verbal harassment from some idiot schoolboys, and one of them invited me to give him ****.  Why they think that just because we're trans, we must also be whores is hard to say.  It's generally impossible to follow the thinking (if there is any) of idiots.

[Jaime R D]

Yeah, it happens. They think you ought to be available for their little experiments just because you're trans. Its creepy alright and often insulting.

[barbie]

I do not waste my valuable time for dealing with them.

barbie~~

[Beth Andrea]

I would say something along the lines of "that's not appropriate" or "that is rude!", and then leave (or turn away from him, perhaps keeping him in your peripheral vision for safety).

Remember, if he touches you after making such a comment, that may be cause for a complaint to the police.

Fwiw, I've had two incidents like that...the first was a neighbor who asked point-blank, "Are those real?" and then poking a breast...I excused myself and left. My other neighbor friend (also a male) then proceeded to...umm...verbally correct the other guys behavior, with a mild emphasis on physical punctuation. (Bad guy ended up with a broken thumb)

Second incident was when I was talking to someone about transitioning, social roles, expectations, etc when he blurted out, "I bet you like playing with your boobs!" I coldly said, "That's none of your business!" and ended the conversation.

[Ms Grace]

Problem is, if you act too outraged it probably gives them a thrill. Some people are just douche bags and get off on being jerks.

[liz]

It's so hard to deal with this kind of idiots. As Foxglove said you can't know how those idiot think and surely not how they will react.
Be careful and take care of yourself

[Beth Andrea]

Problem is, if you act too outraged it probably gives them a thrill. Some people are just douche bags and get off on being jerks.

+1

There's definitely a limit to how much emotion one can express.

[Jill F]

So sorry you had to deal with this creeptastic douchenozzle.

One word comes to mind...

*CHOMP*

[♥︎ SarahD ♥︎]

..."Well, now that you think you're a girl, how about a__...

Personally, I would've taken a leaf out of my mum's book and asked him in return "do you like hospital food or something?" and walked away ♥︎

I hate to say it, but welcome to the world of misogyny and sexism, where women's bodies are just playthings to some men..  x

[Shantel]

So sorry you had to deal with this creeptastic douchenozzle.

One word comes to mind...

*CHOMP*

It really is scary at how much we think alike, could we be twins?

[Eevee]

I've kinda had the opposite experience in this area. Before I came out (I was out as bi though), my old gross roommate tried to get me to sleep with him... and he's supposedly straight. Now that I'm out and transitioning, he's been nothing but respectful towards me. I still don't like him, though. 

[gabimoneratt]

Thankfully I never went through that,  but it annoys me how ignorant people think we transition just so we can attract "real men" sexually...they ignore our issues and feelings and make us just people who "want to be women".  And when we transition we suddenly become a sexual object or perverted to them... It's as if they forget the fact we're still people while we go through transition. Go figure... but cis women also have to deal with that stuff... some men are just stupid. 
Best thing you can do is to ignore him. 

[PinkCloud]

I am glad I'm not approached like that. I do get approached on the streets from time to time. Half of them seem seriously creepy at first, but then they greet me nicely or wish me goodnight/day/evening. Which I can appreciate. But the "hey sweetie" stuff needs to go. Luckily I only got that twice. But I am not a hot woman, and I still get it. I can't imagine being super attractive. The only thing you then seem to attract are these non stop cat callers. I rather be average looking and left alone than being hot and harassed non stop. Besides, getting judged on looks alone isn't my thing. No effing way.

[suzifrommd]

Just ... Ewww!

[Ashey]

Yup, I've dealt with a lot of that, both because I'm trans and because I'm a woman.

[Shantel]

Guess we can thank the ->-bleeped-<- porn industry for those men who think that's what we are all about.

[gabimoneratt]

Guess we can thank the ->-bleeped-<- porn industry for those men who think that's what we are all about.

THIS. Exactly what I thought. I think since the trans population is so small and a lot of us live stealth, most guys only get to see trans girls on porn. It's  different for cis women because they're in much greater quantity, they're mothers of most guys, so they grow up living with one. They're seen everywhere... But even cis women suffer from the porn industry(huge boobs, ass, etc), just a lot less.

[HelloKitty]

Ugh if some guy was that rude to me and asked me for a favour like that....Idk. Would have to walk away or the outcome could be extremely bad for us both.