Hi everyone. This is my first time writing here, but I have something inside me that doesn't let me sleep at night. I wish my body was male. I wish I was socially male. I can't go on living like this. I feel like I could never keep a relationship as my actual self,or even lead a normal life as the gender I was assigned at birth, it grosses me. I've cried, I've hurted myself, praying for waking up as a man the next day. It never worked, but in my dreams I'm always a boy. It all started at puberty, around eleven years old. Before that, I didn't care about gender and sexuality. When I was little I never played with cars, or toys that werw for "boys". I loved imagining I was a wolf, or a lion, later I got obssesed with dinosaurs.I was a happy kid. Now I feel the pain getting bigger as days pass. I think I would do anything if that leads in me becoming XY. I really, really wish I was born male. My relationship with my friends and family has deteriorated a lot. I can't walk in the street, see al those happy people with how they are. It makes me feel like >-bleeped-<. A desesperate >-bleeped-<.
