Hi Fiona,
A big Aussie welcome to Susan's family. It's good of you to drop in and say "Hi". Hope you like it here, and you stay for a while.
There is a mountain of information, resources and friendship waiting for you here, you just need to jump in start talking and ask any question you like. You're quite safe here and we are very accepting.
Tread lightly with your relationship, Fiona. Women are not silly. Their intuitiveness can often reveal more than you'll ever know. The main thing you need to consider is trust. In any relationship, trust is the glue that keeps it together. Once trust is broken, it's extremely hard to get it back again. Open honesty gives trust a place to cling on to.
Just consider the repercussions if your partner found you had found "another girl with the same mind as you" What do you think that would do? Finding a good gender therapist may be a better propersition. At least it would send the right message to your partner.
Looking forward to hearing more of your story in time to come, but in the meantime, be safe, well and happy.
Lotsa huggs
Catherine