Here's the start of soemthing I've been working on. Never attempted something of the sort but have always wondered can I write and keep interest. Critic welcome.
Let me hear back.
Jolted back from the daydreams which had been crowding her mind for the past two hours, Jade, noticed the scenery had changed from the constant stretching wheat fields, just a week away from harvest she estimated, to smooth easy rolling slopes with field corn on either side of the dusty bumpy dirt road. That daydream state of mind had helped pass endless miles of unchanging view from the window of the rented U-Haul truck. Thoughts of spending hours of catching up on the latest happenings in the small lazy country town in the Oklahoma Panhandle.
Jade's thoughts had been altered every since they stopped at the local convenience store to make the call. Teri, Jade's mother was calling to find out if they could get back into their old trailer. The one her family had bought during the last time they lived in this small quiet town. The town wasn't much but it was the only place she considered home. The only place she had ever felt a part of it all. She had always felt welcome by the other people she came in contact with on a daily basis.
The town was straddled along an Oklahoma State Highway, the town it's self was only about six blocks running north and south and nine block running east and west. Consisting of one convenience store, Equity Co-Op Grain Elevators, the Branch Bank of Beaver City, an Oklahoma Tag Office (that doubled as an insurance office too). Two Churches, the Baptist and the Methodist, a quaint little antique store, Lepp Trucking Company, the Post Office, and the Miller's Café where the locals rehashed the previous weeks high school football game and speculated on the outcome of the next game. Also the School that accommodated kindergarten through twelfth grades was housed all in the same building. Just outside of town, there was a feedlot that boarded cattle. The population was somewhere around 1200. Although only about 50 houses actually where located in the town itself.
The call had not been what she had hoped for, nor expected. The man from a town just across the state line in Kansas, her mother had sold the trailer to, had in their absence resold it. Now it was not available to them. Another family was doing some repairs in order that they would occupy the trailer. Teri made a call to the people she had purchased the trailer from to inquire if they had any other places open for rent or sale. Not that they could really afford to buy anything right now. Mr. Albert had let them just make monthly payments the last time because he and his wife's heart went out to the family needing to have a permanent place to call home.
This small town was just the place for spreading one's wings sort of speak, a great place to grow and experience life's beauty. The Albert's had raised three sons of their own here. Mr. Albert explained that he didn't. Being a caring and fair man, he then mentioned another trailer had been given him for just hauling it away. He warned it wasn't much, but to help her out, she could have the trailer. He would pass the trailer on to her free just as it had been to him. He had property the trailer could be moved to, she would pay rent on the ground each month. It was agreed also that she would pay him for the moving and set up and some repairs.
Jade Mercedes Ontiveros, had a pretty dark complexion. Just a slip of a girl about to turn nine years old July eighth, a little over a month away. She had deep brown eyes whose beauty was enhanced by long silky black lashes. A petit wiry body frame lent her the delicate graceful likeness of a dancer. Not a complicated girl yet her mind and heart was full to overflowing longings for a place to call home. Not just somewhere to come and go from. But a place that was truly going to be her home for years to come. Somewhere not to have to pick up and leave all her favorite dwelling spots and special friends behind.
As they continued down a slight hill, cows graced the fields lumbering along without a care. Seeing the sight of one of these calm looking creatures knelt on it's front legs stretching and craning it's neck to reach a clump of something greener and tastier to eat, reminded Jade of the saying" The grass is always greener on the other side of the hill", fence in this case. Her teacher had read a story with that line in it and explained that some people need to hold on to that thought just to make it from day to day. Just to keep hoping for something better than what they had. Just like me Jade thought silently to herself.
That statement hadn't proven true in Colorado for her family though. Now they were on the way to some sort of new home again. That wasn't something new to her and her three sister and two brothers either. They had moved six times in the past three years.Her thoughts drifted back to what could she expect to see when her sister, Mini, and brother's Noni and Joe riding in the U-Haul with her and her mother followed by Gram, Juana and Della, her other two sister in the family van, drove in to the drive of a place that seemed as though it might as well be in a whole other town for how far she would be from friends she used to just walk to see. That five minute drive to the country where the trailer was now located seemed forever.
Jade couldn't help remembering her mother had breezed on quickly when she repeated Mr. Albert's description "It wasn't much". Normally she would have gone on describing how fantastic things were turning out. This in it self was cause to be skeptical about this new place she was going to be calling home.
She couldn't help the sarcastic thought "For how long?" that flashed through her mind. Her parent hadn't been getting along all that well for more than 2 years now. That's why the six moves in the past 3 years. Three months ago they had packed up and moved to Colorado after the nasty split and legal separation of her mother and dad. Six times during the two or more years prior, her mother had packed her and her sisters up and left trying to break away from the troubled marriage, each time only to return, make up with Jade's dad , have another baby, disagreeing some more and the cycle repeated itself.
The stop at the store also revealed the information that most of her friends were gone out of town with their families on vacations. Others were busy with the early harvest just getting underway. It would be in full swing for at least a month. Then there would be the planting for the next crops. It looked bleak for the delightful giggling session she had imagined with girlfriends about all she had missed in those final two months of the school year.
Following the direction given by Mr. Albert, they met his wife on the road a few minutes later. She was driving down to show the property and trailer. Jade could only hear part of what was being said but she had a feeling from the look on Mrs. Albert's face something was amiss.
Mrs. Albert like her husband was a kind hearted caring lady. She was tall with a fair complexion. Her short blond hair waved in the wind. She step from her car and had hugs for all of them. She exchanged a few pleasantries with Teri and Gram.They continued on following Mrs. Albert as she led they way. She pulled in to a drive and waited for the Ontiveros family.
As the family rounded the corner Mrs. Albert was waiting in the drive for them. She was talking to some men in a truck that had asked for directions. Noticing the Mexican Popsicles in the cooler pushcart in the back of the mans green truck, knowing after a 8 possibly 10 hour drive being cooped up the kids would welcome the treat. She purchased one for each of the children. It was like Mrs. Albert to try to make thing seem better.
While Mrs. Albert was giving the directions the to driver of the truck, Jade eyed the trailer and surveyed the property on which it sat. The lovely rolling hills hid them and the trailer from view of the neighbors. If there were any very close they weren't in site. A stream meandered down the slight ravine just over the fence to the east. She noted the fields were dotted with grazing cattle. Some of the cows had spring calves munching grass near by. One of the newborns had managed to go under the fence and was straying across the road to visit the most massive golden brown bull Jade had ever seen. She silently hoped some cows wouldn't come into the field that was probably going to be their yard.
A cow matching in color was followed by its calf of a month or so older than the others seemed to be. Probably belonging to a neighboring farmer to the south, Jade thought as she watched them amble through the field down the well trod cow path. Every once in a while a cotton tail rabbit would run for new cover, startled by the intrusion of strangers being in its' territory. Birds caught Jade's attention as they flew overhead chirping and floating on the constant breeze.
Only a few trees stood near a place where she supposed another trailer or house had been before. With this thought, she turned her eyes to the trailer. White in color with blue trim, the trailer appeared to be newer than the other they had bought from the Albert's. It was weather worn to be sure but maybe it wasn't so bad on the inside. Maybe there would be adventures to take her mind off not being close enough to visit her friends as often as she liked. Besides hadn't she just learned most of them were either out of town or involved in the family farming at present anyway.
How could her mother pass up such a bargain? A trailer for free and only the moving and repair costs. What luck? What luck indeed? Jade stood in bewilderment as her eyes scanned over the interior of the trailer. Her imagination could never have envisioned this devastating mess. Windows were broken out and boards had been put over them, to keep the varmints out she guessed. The dirt had blown in from the windy nature of the Oklahoma Panhandle. Enough to plant a garden... her sarcasm was taking over again. Who ever had lived in this last had left a lot of ragged old furniture. It seemed everywhere she look there was trash, old papers and weathered books, and... But Jade, she chided herself hadn't Mr. Albert promised some repairs? Be fair give it a little time it'll clean up and take shape soon enough. Even her Mother's new friend she'd met on the chat lines on the Internet was coming from Louisiana to help out with the fix up.
Teri Ontiveros, was dark haired women about thirty years of age. With attractive blue eyes and fair skin. She had been married to Jade's father for eleven years. They had met while she had been the sitter for he and his first wife's children. Teri was only seventeen at the time and the children she sat for were just a few years younger than her. Now she was the mother of six children of her own. She still hadn't lost all the weight from carrying her last child. Yet she still was fairly pretty some would say.
Teri had been spending a lot of time the on the computer chatting with James. Jade felt her mother must be thinking this was a safer way to have a relationship, she could just turn off the computer if he said things to her she didn't like. Meeting and married to her dad at seventeen and now thirty, she hadn't dated all that much.
Recently after her parents split, her mom had a date or two before they moved to Colorado but no one more than one time out with the same person. Her mother and James had told each other all about the other. They had been chatting some 4 months by now. They had even exchanged pictures through email of each other and her mother had emailed photos of Jade and her sisters and brothers.
Jade was brought back to reality by hearing only part of a conversation between her mother and Gram. "No I'm not playing the campout game out here tonight!" "I think we'll just drive into town and get Marcaos to pay for a motel room. Marcaos was the children's dad.Then we can come back out in the morning and get started throwing all the trash out, vacuum and wash things up as soon as Mr. Albert get the water hooked up.
Entering into the conversation, "Can we stay at one with swimming pool mom?" "Please," she begged. Neither did she cherish the thought of camping out in the open down here where cows could get out and who knew what else might prowl around in the dark outside.Teri told Mrs. Albert that she would call and inform them where she and the brood would be staying in town.
After a quick stop at Marcaos Ontiveros's mechanic shop and his concessions to her request for him to pay for a room for few nights, Teri took the family to the Southern Winds Motel. On the way she stop for burgers at the McDonalds down the street. They ate and bathed and relaxed for the evening. The pool was closed for the night so swimming would have to wait till morning.
