(ME FREAKING OUT) Vocal feminisation surgery with dr haben

[geeky_jamie]

So, it has been a long time since I posted but I had VFS 12 days ago and Dr Haben recommended 7 days total voice rest which I followed to the tee.  My question is, I have been whispering a lot and I am hoping I dont damage something.  I freak out a lot but work dictates me to make some kind of vocal communication.  I have sneezed once also.  I am super paranoid   

[Dena]

I don't know what to say. Dr Haben said whispering is worst than talking and you should take it easy for the first 2.5 weeks. I couldn't talk for the first 2 weeks so the problem was solved, I just continued using a note pad or keyboard. As for the sneeze, I figured out how to do it without making noise but I also took antihistamines to reduce the risk.

On the plus side, Dr Haben said to control the things you can and don't worry about the things you can't. Most of the time the sutures hold pretty well and I don't know this for a fact but Dr Haben may be using heaver sutures than before because there were some issues with then letting go early. At 12 days you can use a few test words and that may reassure you there hasn't been any damage.

[geeky_jamie]

yea my voice is still hard to get out, I have been taking ibuprofin (my choice), omeprazole and the methylpred as directed.  I just been trying to be careful.  im sure im fine but its me, im a haben girl and I just freak.  I havent drank alcohol or soda and been pretty easy. 

[geeky_jamie]

I just have a habbit on whispering

[Dena]

It can take a while for the swelling to go down to the point where the cords will vibrate. At first, they may not vibrate very well and I think I sounded more machine like because of it. The less you can use your voice, the faster it will heal because Dr Haben said it's ok to use your voice after 2.5 weeks and it's not supposed to damage it but it will slow the healing.

[anjaq]

You cannot change what is done, but if I was you I would stop whispering immediately and use nonverbal communication exclusively. You can use a text-to-speech app if you really need to be on the phone for some unavoidable reason. I almost used it once to order pizza, but then discovered they have online ordering as well. If you insist on whispering, maybe its even better to just talk normally, as whispering is, according to Dr Haben and also to Dr Kim worse than just talking.
It should be clear that VFS means that there is a no-talking period that includes no whispering or any other sounds. One has to plan accordingly and take time off work and organize things in the family to be able to keep that. If that cannot be done, maybe the timing is not right. I know that damage can be done in the first weeks - worst case happened to a friend of mine who had her suture rip open and take a part of one vocal chord with it. She shouted. Less worse case would be to induce increased scarring at the surgical site, which could result in a more hoarse or breathy voice eventually, if the vocal folds cannot close properly in that place.

[kwala]

I echo what Anja said.  Although Dr. Haben doesn't require a month of complete voice rest like Dr. Kim it is still strongly recommended to take it very easy for the entire first month.  Trying your voice out softly a few times a day is fine, but you really don't want to overdo it because the sutures could come undone prematurely which might prevent the web from forming. So...Take it easy, girl!  Wishing you a successful outcome 

[Katie]

Look it has been 3/4 of a year since I got my surgery with Dr. Haben. My voice is still healing. It takes a freaking long time and it goes through a lot of changes. It took over six months till I finally was able to control my voice well. I am not joking babe it takes a long time.

Don't sweat it all just go with the flow.

Katie

[Denjin]

You just need to reach some sort of understanding at work.  Also, speaking quietly in your normal voice is much better than whispering which is deceptively bad for your vocal cords.

It's very early days - hang in there.  I'm at five weeks (Yeson, though) and I still can only talk for a bit in the morning at work and then can't do a lot in the afternoon.

[GeekGirl]

So, it has been a long time since I posted but I had VFS 12 days ago and Dr Haben recommended 7 days total voice rest which I followed to the tee.  My question is, I have been whispering a lot and I am hoping I dont damage something.  I freak out a lot but work dictates me to make some kind of vocal communication.  I have sneezed once also.  I am super paranoid

Although I didn't have a favorable outcome (my voice didn't change) after my first go with Dr. Haben, I agree with everyone that being completely silent and not using your voice at all is the way to go. For the week and a half that I didn't speak, I tried to use all manner of hand gestures to get my point across. I wrote words every now and again and people responded well to what I was trying to say. Strangely, you may find that people go out of their way to understand what a mute is saying who is just using hand gestures.

So one thing I've noticed with everyone's journey is everyone starts off with an out of tune voice, which is normal because we're all trying to get used to hearing ourselves. Over the course of time, with more healing, talking, singing, voice training, etc, eventually our voice gets tuned to the way we want to use it. I relate this entire surgical experience as being given a kid's vocal chords and learning how to use it over time. I believe that in the beginning some of us might have unrealistic expectations of our voice because we're used to a "get-thin/pretty/rich/whatever-quick" society, but the healing process is especially slow for the voice. For those of you who've had GRS, your healing process may have been especially slow like mine. It all depends on your age, health, and healing factor. I'm always excited to hear a good VFS outcome here. It gives me hope that mine will turn out well, however, I know that everyone's journey is different.

Just counting the days until my July surgery date!