College and a Career As a Trans Woman

[sciencegal]

Hi everyone, this is my first post here. I'm 19 years old and about to move away for university. This will be my second year of college (I've been living at home doing community college classes this past year). My story is the same as many of yours I'm sure. I've always known that something felt off or wrong with me. During high school I was comfortable coming out as a gay boy and fought my way to defend my identity. I knew I could handle being a feminine guy. But I also know that's not all there is to it; I hate being referred to as a "guy," "man," anything like that.

Going off to college was going to be exciting. I really want to study microbiology and eventually become a professor. I love the field I will be going into. However, now I am terrified of not being able to achieve those dreams if I come out as a trans woman. I want to be taken seriously and treated with respect. I know I am still very young and have a long ways to go. It would really help if I could get some advice on where to go from here.

Thanks so much for your time xx

[Alora]

Hey science gal,

Welcome to Susan's. I'm a few years shy of twice your age but I totally understand some of your fears. Especially, discovering my real self shortly after returning. I'd like to share something with you:

http://www.southseattle.edu/news/2017/faces_kaylin.aspx

I'm not sure how the science world treats individuals that identify as transsexual, but my industry (especially the unions) can have some very old views and loud mouths. I don't want to give up my passion. In fact I'm planning on going as far as I can with it. I hope to be a beacon that anything is possible.

But I also know that I am going to have to make myself as strong as the steel I manipulate. I'm going to have to work harder to prove I belong. But I'm ok with that. I come from part of a generation that learned that it's better to show what you can do then talk about what you can do.

The thing that has helped me the most is not being concerned with passing right now. Right now I'm focusing on being happy, finding out who this girl is that locked away so long ago, and figuring out what drives her. What are her passions.

The rest will fall into place. I hope that helps you a little bit.

Loves [emoji182]❤️[emoji182]
Kay


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[Dayta]

Hiya science gal,

I know a number of gay, queer and transgender academics, and I believe that academia is probably one of the most forgiving and accepting communities wrt transgender students/teachers.  It may be somewhat less welcoming in the sciences than in humanities, but universities in general tend to accommodate us better than industry or commerce. 

I work in the aerospace industry, in Los Angeles, and besides me, who came out exactly one month ago, I know of one transgender woman at my previous company who came out about 25-30 years ago.  It may be more common at other sites/companies, but it's certainly the exception rather than the rule.  Given that, it's kind of hard to assess how easy or difficult transition will be in general. 

Erin

[Jenn88]

I am an electrician who recently came out and I can say being in construction trying to transition is going to be tough.

[Squirebuffy1990]

I know this is a controversial thing to say and it will upset a few people, but I think its especially true for young MTF women who want to be successful in the 'mainstream workplace' (as myself). You have to play the game a bit and being passable and presentable is important. Work on yourself and be push yourself to be strong and a desirable employee in your image and your attitude. It can be done.

When you look good you feel good and while it's not all about "fitting in", it certainty helps.

[Cindy]

Hi everyone, this is my first post here. I'm 19 years old and about to move away for university. This will be my second year of college (I've been living at home doing community college classes this past year). My story is the same as many of yours I'm sure. I've always known that something felt off or wrong with me. During high school I was comfortable coming out as a gay boy and fought my way to defend my identity. I knew I could handle being a feminine guy. But I also know that's not all there is to it; I hate being referred to as a "guy," "man," anything like that.

Going off to college was going to be exciting. I really want to study microbiology and eventually become a professor. I love the field I will be going into. However, now I am terrified of not being able to achieve those dreams if I come out as a trans woman. I want to be taken seriously and treated with respect. I know I am still very young and have a long ways to go. It would really help if I could get some advice on where to go from here.

Thanks so much for your time xx

Hi Sciencegal and Welcome to Susan's

All I can add to the conversation is that I am a Professor of Immunology and I have had an International and National career as both a research scientist, diagnostician and teacher. In my experience, at least in Australia,  there has been little if any discrimination to me. The anti-discrimination laws here are strong and enforced. 


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[elkie-t]

Going off to college was going to be exciting. I really want to study microbiology and eventually become a professor. I love the field I will be going into. However, now I am terrified of not being able to achieve those dreams if I come out as a trans woman. I want to be taken seriously and treated with respect. I know I am still very young and have a long ways to go. It would really help if I could get some advice on where to go from here.

Facts (as I can see them, it's my opinion only):
1) thank god, education and science is probably the most acceptable and tolerant place for career.
2) the day you come out as a trans, you'll lose your male privilege.  Meaning, you probably will be treated with some suspicion (at least academically), you will have to work extra-hard to overcome it, you might miss some great career opportunities because of your status which otherwise would be yours, and when you get a job your pay will probably be lower than your male peers (and then same story will repeat again and again).
3) if you decide to hide who you are, you will build your life pretending to be a male. If you decide to come out later, everything you worked for, your social network, your friendships, your family, is most likely to be mostly gone, and you will have to build new social life, new support system for yourself, forge new friendships. Which is not as easy at 30 or 40, than at 20s while in college...

I'd say, if you feel that you are a woman, start being one as soon as possible. Don't build your life on a sand foundation. Granted, you will have to work harder, and it's not fair to all women to be taken less seriously than men, but I think for you, it will be more rewarding to be treated as one of them (with all good and bad), than trying to game the system now and realizing that your best years were lived in lie. That way, you'd know your friends are people who accept you, and will be with you forever, your life partner will be the one who knows you and cares about you (and not of your MtF status), that your job and career in general (maybe less well-paid than it could) is safe and secure, and money don't buy you happiness.